Anyone else burnt out with DC lifestyle

[Anonymous]

Nope, we love it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know of one federal agency where people who deploy to other parts of the country or world for a 2-3 year rotation, will FIGHT being transferred back here. Anywhere but here. I think that speaks volumes.

I think the biggest thing for me is you don't even get much of a break from the stress on the weekends. Traffic everywhere, jammed stores, often end up sitting in traffic jams on the beltway or 66. That's the big thing for me. Work week, sure it's a busy hectic time, but to have that on the weekends as well, forget it.

Other big cities have similar problems, but there are others that have the amenities of a big city, without so many of the probllems of a big city. I'm originally from Minneapolis and am looking forward to moving back there soon after 10 years in DC. Minneapolis is one of those places. Culture, diversity, vibrant city life, decent jobs, but a slower pace of life. It's the best of everything. Work isn't the #1 focus as it is here.

If we travel more than 3 miles from our house on the weekends, we metro. Voila, stress gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your life is what you make. You have some control and can chose to participate (or not). If you don't like it, change it.

Monday - Friday: DH and i go to work with drop off and pick up at day care, we get home at 6:15, fix dinner, bath, put kids to bed, load the dishwasher, tidy the living room, and we go to bed etc..

Week-ends: Do an activity with the kids in the morning, run errands, clean the house, catch up on some personal e-mail since our family lives far away, etc..

This leaves us very litte/no time to do anything for relaxation, going out, meeting with friends.

It's because you have kids, not because you live in DC. What do you think your friends in Portland or Milwaukee are doing so differently with their time if they have the same number of kids you do at about the same ages?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know of one federal agency where people who deploy to other parts of the country or world for a 2-3 year rotation, will FIGHT being transferred back here. Anywhere but here. I think that speaks volumes.

I think the biggest thing for me is you don't even get much of a break from the stress on the weekends. Traffic everywhere, jammed stores, often end up sitting in traffic jams on the beltway or 66. That's the big thing for me. Work week, sure it's a busy hectic time, but to have that on the weekends as well, forget it.

Other big cities have similar problems, but there are others that have the amenities of a big city, without so many of the probllems of a big city. I'm originally from Minneapolis and am looking forward to moving back there soon after 10 years in DC. Minneapolis is one of those places. Culture, diversity, vibrant city life, decent jobs, but a slower pace of life. It's the best of everything. Work isn't the #1 focus as it is here.

Minneapolis is very cold and very slow paced compared to DC. If you don't like winter sports, how many times can you tour the Walker Museum?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope! Love our life. Our neighborhood is 100% walkable to all amenities. I WAH full-time and DH has a 5 min Metro commute.

Our neighborhood is filled with tons of kids and great parents. Impromptu family happy hours almost every weekend, lots of local neighborhood events, etc. We have the city vibe with great public schools...and the free museums within a stone's throw.

Parents often go in on a sitter and walk to the local bars and restaurants at least once a week.

Details please! Where do you live?

This sounds like Capitol Hill except the part about the great public schools.

It probably is Capitol Hill and there ARE great public schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP who claims to live in utopia is full of crap. People who think this place is the be all and end all is full of crap. They don't call it spin city for nothing! It is ironic to me that OP and most other posters feel this place is isolating and can be depressing, and PPs react with "it must be you". WTF? Way to be supportive, a**holes! And you actually claim to wonder what OP is talking about? Really? Really?

Bloom where you're planted or move. You sound like part of the problem.

Chill. Breathe.

I love this

I have a single friend that moves to other areas constantly because it is always 'the place' that is the problem. She's never happy and assumes the next locale will be where her 'future husband' is located. After moving to several different cities over the past 5 years she is back in DC and can't stand 'the other places'.

You can change your location but if you are a miserable person---most likely you will still be miserable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your life is what you make. You have some control and can chose to participate (or not). If you don't like it, change it.

Monday - Friday: DH and i go to work with drop off and pick up at day care, we get home at 6:15, fix dinner, bath, put kids to bed, load the dishwasher, tidy the living room, and we go to bed etc..

Week-ends: Do an activity with the kids in the morning, run errands, clean the house, catch up on some personal e-mail since our family lives far away, etc..

This leaves us very litte/no time to do anything for relaxation, going out, meeting with friends.

It's because you have kids, not because you live in DC. What do you think your friends in Portland or Milwaukee are doing so differently with their time if they have the same number of kids you do at about the same ages?

We moved here from a smaller city a few years ago. DH has the same exact job, but his hours have increased quite a bit and his commute is longer even though we're the exact same distance from his job. We are looking forward to eventually moving back to a smaller city so we can get back to our old quality of life. DC isn't for everyone. People have a right to feel however they feel. Every city has a culture, and I think it's fair to say that (in general) DC'ites tend to focus on education, money, and power. If that's not your "tifecta," some of the day-to-day annoyances of living here might affect you more than others.

[Anonymous]

We moved here from a smaller city a few years ago. DH has the same exact job, but his hours have increased quite a bit and his commute is longer even though we're the exact same distance from his job. We are looking forward to eventually moving back to a smaller city so we can get back to our old quality of life. DC isn't for everyone. People have a right to feel however they feel. Every city has a culture, and I think it's fair to say that (in general) DC'ites tend to focus on education, money, and power. If that's not your "tifecta," some of the day-to-day annoyances of living here might affect you more than others.


You sound like a lovely and sensible person...what are you doing on DCUM?

[Anonymous]

"Bloom where you are planted"? "It must be you"? No wonder OP is expressing her opinion, God forbid! And God forbid we mention God! We can't actually be tolerant of other people's opinions, can we? No, we're supposed to be puppets. Angry puppets, at that.

We didn't sign up for the military honey, and have no intention of "sucking it up". We can say what we feel about where we are, including but not limited to how miserable and unwelcoming some of the people can really be. Case in point.

OP, there are some great places where people are educated, accomplished AND happy - WOW! I have to agree with PP who said that D.C. is a pit stop, not a destination for many. Ignore those with the canned responses who prove it in fact is NOT you!

[Anonymous]

"We moved here from a smaller city a few years ago. DH has the same exact job, but his hours have increased quite a bit and his commute is longer even though we're the exact same distance from his job. We are looking forward to eventually moving back to a smaller city so we can get back to our old quality of life. DC isn't for everyone. People have a right to feel however they feel. Every city has a culture, and I think it's fair to say that (in general) DC'ites tend to focus on education, money, and power. If that's not your "tifecta," some of the day-to-day annoyances of living here might affect you more than others. "

But isn't your DH making a lot more money here? Are you a SAHM?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

"Bloom where you are planted"? "It must be you"? No wonder OP is expressing her opinion, God forbid! And God forbid we mention God! We can't actually be tolerant of other people's opinions, can we? No, we're supposed to be puppets. Angry puppets, at that.

We didn't sign up for the military honey, and have no intention of "sucking it up". We can say what we feel about where we are, including but not limited to how miserable and unwelcoming some of the people can really be. Case in point.

OP, there are some great places where people are educated, accomplished AND happy - WOW! I have to agree with PP who said that D.C. is a pit stop, not a destination for many. Ignore those with the canned responses who prove it in fact is NOT you!

No denying there are other places where people are educated, accomplished and happy. But DC has the best job and real estate markets in the country right now.

[Anonymous]

These posts drive me crazy. DC is one of the most diverse places I have been. If you don't like the people you interact with, please just find other people. Honestly I do not run into a single stressed out social-climbing entitled person in my day ever. Change your circles. If you are stressed, cut out stressors - don't blame "DC culture" - blame the choices you've made and make changes.

[Anonymous]

PP, you're absolutely right. Skip the crowded festivals and pumpkin patches, and keep your kids enrolled in one activity at a time. Just slow it down!

[Anonymous]

I've come to think that a lot of the "DC Sucks" people are folks that have chosen to participate in all the negative aspects of DC culture. I certainly acknowledge they are there: the focus on work, the competitiveness, the sense of superiority stemming from professional accomplishment, money and/or education - BUT - it is avoidable if you seek to steer clear of it. If you stop just following the crowd to the "best" neighborhoods, the "best" schools, the "best" stores, the "best" activities, you might find this alternate universe of near-normalcy that exists in this area. Will this city ever be as easy as somewhere like Minneapolis? Probably not. But it doesn't have to be the sentence to a miserable existence that some people seem to feel it is. OP, what do you and DH do, where do you live, and what kind of things are you doing with your kids that have you so "burnt out with the DC lifestyle"? If you can't leave the DC area altogether, maybe there are tweaks you can make to your lifestyle here that will make you happier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've come to think that a lot of the "DC Sucks" people are folks that have chosen to participate in all the negative aspects of DC culture. I certainly acknowledge they are there: the focus on work, the competitiveness, the sense of superiority stemming from professional accomplishment, money and/or education - BUT - it is avoidable if you seek to steer clear of it. If you stop just following the crowd to the "best" neighborhoods, the "best" schools, the "best" stores, the "best" activities, you might find this alternate universe of near-normalcy that exists in this area. Will this city ever be as easy as somewhere like Minneapolis? Probably not. But it doesn't have to be the sentence to a miserable existence that some people seem to feel it is. OP, what do you and DH do, where do you live, and what kind of things are you doing with your kids that have you so "burnt out with the DC lifestyle"? If you can't leave the DC area altogether, maybe there are tweaks you can make to your lifestyle here that will make you happier.

Awesome post! I hope the OP responds. What is the major source of the problem? Long commute? Move closer to work/ask about telework/get a new job. Ok maybe easier said than done and yes, you may have to settle for smaller, older house. But if the commute is killing you, seriously there are things you can do. Stressed out by applications to private schools and charter schools and trying to decide what activities to sign your kid up for so he makes friends and has enough extra curriculars on his applications? Stop! "Settle" for one of Montgomery County's or Fairfax/Arlington County's good enough public schools. Have social climbing friends? Stop calling them.

Maybe this over-simplifying, but changes can be made. Not everyone in DC has the stereotypical DC "lifestyle.". In fact, I'd argue that very few people actually do.