Anyone else burnt out with DC lifestyle

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even if everyone agreed that living IN DC was the be-all, end-all, where would they live? And if you think competition for those OOB spots was fierce before millions of suburban residents moved to your neighborhood, well...

But clearly not everyone thinks that. My 22 year old self would be ashamed of my 39 year old self, but I love the (close in) burbs. I couldn't do the far out ones (if I was commuting to DC, I could if I could be gauranteed a job with lots of telecommuting or that was outside the city).

Right, most people in the DC metro region will always live outside the city. It's just that middle-class and upper-middle class will tend to self-segregate in the city, and DC's poor will continue to emigrate to the suburbs where housing is cheaper, and blue-collar jobs are more plentiful. Traffic congestion will continue to get worse. Life in the 'burbs will continue to get marginally less pleasant. Live in the city (and close-in suburbs) will continue to get marginally more pleasant. Eventually DC will simply be another wealthy neighborhood in the region--albeit one with amazing transportation infrastructure and other amenities.

Please. My neighborhood in the close in burbs is full of government attorneys and the like. I'm sandwiched between two of them. Plenty of middle class professionals with a HHI of 150K and above in the burbs. We shop at Whole Foods, we meet new moms in prenatal yoga, and congregate at the neighborhood farmer's market.

Please yourself. If you're in the "close-in burbs" then for all intents and purposes you live in the city. As I said above, "Life in the 'burbs will continue to get marginally less pleasant. Life in the city (and close-in suburbs) will continue to get marginally more pleasant.." What were historically the streetcar suburbs will do fine. The sprawling developments that metastasized over the last forty years will be the ones to wither.

Agree that the sprawl and the exurbs or whatever they are called will be like this for sure. You just made it sound like everyone out of the city was in the demographic you described.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Even if everyone agreed that living IN DC was the be-all, end-all, where would they live? And if you think competition for those OOB spots was fierce before millions of suburban residents moved to your neighborhood, well...

But clearly not everyone thinks that. My 22 year old self would be ashamed of my 39 year old self, but I love the (close in) burbs. I couldn't do the far out ones (if I was commuting to DC, I could if I could be gauranteed a job with lots of telecommuting or that was outside the city).

Right, most people in the DC metro region will always live outside the city. It's just that middle-class and upper-middle class will tend to self-segregate in the city, and DC's poor will continue to emigrate to the suburbs where housing is cheaper, and blue-collar jobs are more plentiful. Traffic congestion will continue to get worse. Life in the 'burbs will continue to get marginally less pleasant. Live in the city (and close-in suburbs) will continue to get marginally more pleasant. Eventually DC will simply be another wealthy neighborhood in the region--albeit one with amazing transportation infrastructure and other amenities.

Please. My neighborhood in the close in burbs is full of government attorneys and the like. I'm sandwiched between two of them. Plenty of middle class professionals with a HHI of 150K and above in the burbs. We shop at Whole Foods, we meet new moms in prenatal yoga, and congregate at the neighborhood farmer's market.

Please yourself. If you're in the "close-in burbs" then for all intents and purposes you live in the city. As I said above, "Life in the 'burbs will continue to get marginally less pleasant. Life in the city (and close-in suburbs) will continue to get marginally more pleasant.." What were historically the streetcar suburbs will do fine. The sprawling developments that metastasized over the last forty years will be the ones to wither.

Agree that the sprawl and the exurbs or whatever they are called will be like this for sure. You just made it sound like everyone out of the city was in the demographic you described.

Ah, sorry. I wasn't being very precise. Obviously the set of walkable neighborhoods that adjoin the central urban core don't map perfectly with arbitrary political boundaries. Obviously places like Bethesda, Silver Spring, Clarendon, Alexandria, Hyattsville, etc... will thrive.

[Anonymous]

Check out the thread on the OP brining her kids to the KC evening performance. Yup, she is why I hate this area.

[Anonymous]

Yes, we moved. We had no family in the area. The poor customer service, congestion, and lack of amenities and CHILDCARE availability in the immediate area (we lived in DC) were very, very stressful (remember we are talking before the recession).

I am a fed and I work remotely, and DH is his own consulting company. We moved to the philly area and 2 years later, we are still happy we made the move. So are the grandparents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Funny, I have always thought it was the many self-righteous, nasty, mean-spirited, condescending, judgmental nerds that made this town less va-va-voom than it could be. The PP (15:53) seems to exemplify that odious type in full measure. Please, return to London immediately.

See, to each his own. "I hardly think offering the "London is way better" argument (true though it is) helps Betty from Peoria feel better about her lengthy commute home to Rockthesda . . . " is perhaps my favorite line of the year. I may start using Rockthesda as my new term of derogation for the suburbs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, it's as if these DC posters actually believe there are no jobs whatsoever outside of Washington DC.

Work in Leesburg and in a few months, will have a place in Leesburg. DW works in Chantilly, so why (aside from bragging rights) do we need to live inside the FFX County Parkway?

That's great that you were able to move out of the DC area. Not quite as far as Maine, but still...

Thanks. A few months in "Real Virginia" and I'll be looking down on you guys just as well as you look down on me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think I disagree with the PPs that say the DC burn-out would be the same in other cities/towns. I think there's something unique in DC. Haven't you had family/friends come into town and mention how unfriendly/uptight the people are here? Haven't you noticed how tense the other parents are? I've seen so many who are always jockeying to figure out what reading group your kid is in, what soccer team he's on, what school he's been accepted to. All of this competition on top of a very work oriented environment makes this a less fun place to live than many other places.

Yes! It's unique to DC. I've learned to live here and enjoy my job, my family life, etc, but I totally get it. It's tough to take sometimes. Lots of competition and stress. You need to work to reduce that in your life the best way that you can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"We moved here from a smaller city a few years ago. DH has the same exact job, but his hours have increased quite a bit and his commute is longer even though we're the exact same distance from his job. We are looking forward to eventually moving back to a smaller city so we can get back to our old quality of life. DC isn't for everyone. People have a right to feel however they feel. Every city has a culture, and I think it's fair to say that (in general) DC'ites tend to focus on education, money, and power. If that's not your "tifecta," some of the day-to-day annoyances of living here might affect you more than others. "

But isn't your DH making a lot more money here? Are you a SAHM?

I am not a SAHM, and my DH did not get a raise to move here (maybe a tiny COLA). He works for the gov't and was transferred here, though we will have the opportunity to transfer again soon. I don't hate it, but I also think some places live better (for me, anyway). No matter how much one might like it here, there are indisputable drawbacks to the region: high cost of living, traffic, etc. We've done our best to minimize them--we live in a small place close-in--and it's not too bad. But I do feel claustrophobic at times--mostly on the weekends as others have pointed out. And I did not feel this way before we moved here, which is how I know that I'm not simply a "malcontent." Also, I do realize there are many people here who are laid-back and not uber-competitive, power-hungry, greed-mongers (we've made many good friends here). However, I think because so many people come here for better work opportunities, you find more "live to work" people than you might in other areas.

I guess the bottom line is: in moving here, our free time went down, our commute times went up, our house got smaller, and our mortgage got bigger. And sometimes I b*tch about it.

It's ok. I bitch about it too. Don't listen to the folks who are telling you to move or that all you do is complain. I live my life here and work my way around the stress but it does get to me too. I exercise alot to relieve the stress. Some of us understand!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know of one federal agency where people who deploy to other parts of the country or world for a 2-3 year rotation, will FIGHT being transferred back here. Anywhere but here. I think that speaks volumes.

I think the biggest thing for me is you don't even get much of a break from the stress on the weekends. Traffic everywhere, jammed stores, often end up sitting in traffic jams on the beltway or 66. That's the big thing for me. Work week, sure it's a busy hectic time, but to have that on the weekends as well, forget it.

Other big cities have similar problems, but there are others that have the amenities of a big city, without so many of the probllems of a big city. I'm originally from Minneapolis and am looking forward to moving back there soon after 10 years in DC. Minneapolis is one of those places. Culture, diversity, vibrant city life, decent jobs, but a slower pace of life. It's the best of everything. Work isn't the #1 focus as it is here.

YES! The weekend activities are a huge source of stress for me. Its hard to relax when everywhere you go has crowd problems: getting out of town? Must leave Thurs. Shopping? super packed roads, parking and stores. Festival? wall to wall people? Even the pumpkin patch is a crowd nightmare! National Park? no parking by noon. Crescent Trail? Too packed to take kids safely. I imagine NY is like this. But most other US cities? I doubt it.

My sister has lived all over the Twin Cities now for 30 years -since her college graduation. You wouldn't be able to get her out of there if you offered her a million dollars. Minneapolis is a wonderful place and I would love to go there too, but my husband and I have jobs HERE and not there. You are right...Minneapolis has culture AND a slower pace. Love the lakes and bike paths too! I hope you get to move back to the TWIN CITIES!!

[Anonymous]

Minneapolis is really freakin' cold though. I don't think I could handle the winters. Otherwise it does sound like a nice place, but for 5 months of the year I think I'd be miserable. I just don't handle cold weather well.

[Anonymous]

Hello OP: I could have written your post. I just cannot stand how my little ones are probably getting more car time than fun time it seems sometimes as we can spend almost one hour one way in the car just to go to a crowded Target...Or the traffic...I hear you and we are looking to move to Clarence (suburb of Buffalo)...The cost of living is very affordable (beautiful house with good schools for $250K...that was another pet peeve of mine that in order to get anything nice in this area with decent schools good luck finding anything cheaper than 400K and most times all we could afford is a townhouse (no offense to those in town homes)....But I am not denying this is an incredible area with much to do and that the reason why it is so crowded and traffic is because it is a "hot" area to live....Oh well, we want out of the "rat race"..

[Anonymous]

My children have never been to Target....the few times I've been, I've left them with Dad. I'm sure the DC area stinks worse for SAHMs that for full time WOHMs. I find things set up well here to accommodate the two working parent lifestyle.