Location sharing

[Anonymous]

This is how I found out my husband was having an affair.

Before, I would have bet my children’s lives that he wasn’t cheating. I would have bet every penny I had.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are good friends with another family. Between us, we have 5 kids and all of us share everyone's location.

It's all about logistics.

If you're traveling or something special is going on, sure. But c'mon, did you grow up being tracked? Can you imagine giving up all sense of freedom as a teen because your parents treated you like a dog? I think it's gross. It's inhuman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I would never ever agree to being tracked.

It just kind of goes against my valuation of privacy. The whole "if you have nothing to hide, why not" just seems like a normalization of lack of boundaries and trust. It's also why I wouldn't go through my spouse's phone or have my spouse go through mine.

Also setting the cultural expectation of lack of privacy at home or modeling it for my children to me presents a problematic larger picture.

+1

[Anonymous]

Everyone's getting too comfortable living in a surveillance state.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No. I would never ever agree to being tracked.

It just kind of goes against my valuation of privacy. The whole "if you have nothing to hide, why not" just seems like a normalization of lack of boundaries and trust. It's also why I wouldn't go through my spouse's phone or have my spouse go through mine.

Also setting the cultural expectation of lack of privacy at home or modeling it for my children to me presents a problematic larger picture.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds good. If one of you got kidnapped, or murdered, it would help tremendously, why wouldn’t you share locations?

To be fair, odds of OP or her DH getting kidnapped or murdered are minuscule but it can be helpful for more likely smaller emergencies.

Murdered...it's too late. Kidnapper tossed your phone on minute 2.

[Anonymous]

It did not exist when we met/married and we just never started. I guess maybe when we are old enough for health concerns. We do do it on long trips.

[Anonymous]

Our family of 4 shares all our locations. I don’t look unless absolutely necessary and it’s just helpful. Info. People afraid of “surveillance” are paranoid. I really don’t have anything to hide. I’m at work, home, grocery store, a friends house. No big deal to me at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The weirdest thing happened to me once. Spouse and I were having problems and were briefly separated, and during our separation location sharing had me in a place (a harmless place) where I absolutely was not. This was a while ago, and I think was Facebook? So I'm sure they're more accurate. In any event, I was asked why I was there and denied I was and came across as lying even though I wasn't. So it wasn't a good thing and I've been queasy about location sharing ever since.

To the point that it could make a bad marriage worse, you were clearly having issues if you were separated and having problems. My husband and I wouldn't accuse each other of lying if this had happened, we'd think it was funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I would never ever agree to being tracked.

Well, you are being tracked all the time, just to be clear.

[Anonymous]

We don't. Together 26 years.

Discussed it with DH one time after reading a thread on here. Just as an interesting point of topic, not trying to suggest we try.

Interestingly, neither of us cared about our own privacy concerns. We work from home, we're not doing anything interesting.

But we both didn't want to track because we don't want to know what the *other* is doing all the time. Not from a trust way. But from a "it's mentally healthy to be digitally untethered" way. It fine to not know when DH is coming home from work. It's fine to not know exactly where someone else is all the time. The poster above who said they've got their kids really into following the tracker.... i just feel bad for kids who get that level of immediacy on everything in life.

For people who need this level of information, or constant comfort that DH or kids are okay, this always sounds like anxiety to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We do as a family. Its been helpful when my car has broken down so my husband can find me and other times.

this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did, and then my husband's (of 25 years) kept going out, and I didn't think much of it. and didn't really ask. I mean he only really went to work, work events and back.
Well, turns out he was having an affair with a married coworker and he ended up leaving our family for her (and she left her husband).

So, now location sharing is a must in my family with my kids and any future partner.

Ugh!!!

[Anonymous]

I would feel like a stalker. No thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The weirdest thing happened to me once. Spouse and I were having problems and were briefly separated, and during our separation location sharing had me in a place (a harmless place) where I absolutely was not. This was a while ago, and I think was Facebook? So I'm sure they're more accurate. In any event, I was asked why I was there and denied I was and came across as lying even though I wasn't. So it wasn't a good thing and I've been queasy about location sharing ever since.

To the point that it could make a bad marriage worse, you were clearly having issues if you were separated and having problems. My husband and I wouldn't accuse each other of lying if this had happened, we'd think it was funny.

No, you wouldn't. You would not think the location was wrong. It's easy for you to think that in the abstract, but you wouldn't.