Should single women over 35 settle if they want children?
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Anonymous
She can still meet someone she likes, and have children |
Anonymous
Sniff, sniff. Such a cute story! I hope your current husband realizes how much you sacrificed to be with him! You could have had a hot guy! |
Anonymous
But are you attracted to your partner? |
Anonymous
Someone she likes but isn’t attracted to??? |
Anonymous
| One of the most important attributes is how much you are romantically desired by the other person. Don’t settle for someone who doesn’t truly desire you. |
Anonymous
|
No settling. Never works |
Anonymous
I'm using likes and attractive interchangeably |
Anonymous
| OP if you ever do get married, it won't be you who is doing the settling . |
Anonymous
| 35 is too old dangerous for the baby |
Anonymous
Yes of course but that's want my main goal |
Anonymous
It's not. Relative risk is higher, but absolute risk is low, you rearhat. |
Anonymous
| Did you recently see yourself single or you've been single for a while with little to no previous romantic experience? |
Anonymous
Your framing is wrong. What many are trying to point out to OP is that, once you are years down the road raising kids, it’s common to realize that some of the qualities you value most in your partner were not the ones you prioritized while dating. |
Anonymous
The best biological window for pregnancy is generally the 20s to early 30s. That is when fertility is highest, egg quality is better, miscarriage risk is lower, and pregnancy complications are generally lower. ACOG says fertility starts declining by around age 30, declines faster in the mid-30s, and by 45 has declined so much that natural pregnancy is unlikely for most women. ASRM also says fertility begins dropping in the late 20s or early 30s and falls more rapidly after 35. That does not mean every woman over 35 cannot have a healthy baby. Of course many do. But it is dishonest to pretend 35 is medically the same as 25 or 30. It is not. ACOG specifically classifies pregnancy at 35+ as "advanced maternal age" because risks are higher for both the mother and baby, including miscarriage, chromosomal abnormalities, gestational diabetes, preeclampsia, cesarean delivery, preterm birth, low birth weight, and stillbirth. And no, "absolute risk is low" does not erase the issue. Relative risk matters when you are talking about fertility, miscarriage, stillbirth, and genetic abnormalities. A risk can still be statistically meaningful even if many pregnancies turn out fine. After 35, women are often told to seek fertility evaluation after only 6 months of trying, not after a full year, because fertility declines with age. CDC says some providers evaluate and treat women 35+ after 6 months of unprotected sex, and NIH/NICHD gives the same general threshold. Also, fertility treatments are not magic. Hormone stimulation, IVF, egg retrieval, genetic testing, donor eggs, and high-risk OB monitoring may become more relevant with age, but they do not fully undo age-related egg quality decline. ASRM says women delaying pregnancy after 35 should get information on testing and treatment while staying realistic about the chances of success. So the accurate medical statement is this: the ideal biological age to have a baby is usually in the 20s to early 30s. After 35, fertility is lower and pregnancy risks are higher. Plenty of women still have healthy babies after 35, but pretending age does not matter is misinformation. |
Anonymous
| Don't settle its better to stay childless than settle. Its selfish to settle and bring poor child into your unhappy mess. |