Should I Continue Babysitting My Boyfriend’s Kids?

[Anonymous]

I would leave him with his kids and also your kids and go away for the weekend. Fun times!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: We’ve been officially dating for 7 months, but we’ve known each other since college. I’ve been babysitting for about four months now. I have two kids — a 15-year-old daughter, and a 19 year daughter away at college, with my ex-husband. I was also briefly married right out of high school/in freshman year college (young and dumb, so I don’t really count that one..).

OK but his kids haven't known you since college. And nothing you said changes the fact that you're free, a convenient way for him to dump his kids and avoid responsibility. Do you all live together?

No, we don’t live together. He’s very busy with work, including during weekends, which is why he asked me to babysit. The kids mother, doesn’t mind.

You're a fool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been dating and do you plan to marry him?

We’ve been dating 7 months, and we haven’t talked about marriage yet, I don’t know.. I’m twice divorced.

So you're used to making bad decisions and being exploited. At the same time, I suppose these poor kids have nowhere else to go and no mother figure in their lives. Maybe you are doing some good in the world by being a part-time mother to these children, and thanks to you, they will grow up to be better adults.

But yes, your boyfriend is totally abusing your generosity and goodwill. It seems like you're in the same circle of bad men. You should move and break into different social circles.

OP, please read this to yourself until you memorize it.

[Anonymous]

Why are you dating a man who isn't spending time with you and also taking advantage of free babysitting? You need to dump him and find someone who can manage adult life much better. And since your picker is off, no.meeting the kids for 1 year.

[Anonymous]

If you can't say no, at least charge him the market rate for being his nanny. We pay $40/hr for an experienced nanny for our kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: We’ve been officially dating for 7 months, but we’ve known each other since college. I’ve been babysitting for about four months now. I have two kids — a 15-year-old daughter, and a 19 year daughter away at college, with my ex-husband. I was also briefly married right out of high school/in freshman year college (young and dumb, so I don’t really count that one..).

OK but his kids haven't known you since college. And nothing you said changes the fact that you're free, a convenient way for him to dump his kids and avoid responsibility. Do you all live together?

No, we don’t live together. He’s very busy with work, including during weekends, which is why he asked me to babysit. The kids mother, doesn’t mind.

He could make choices about his schedule to be more available, he just doesn't want to do it. He's using you and you are letting him. I'd be very suspicious about what he's actually doing "at work" overnight on the weekend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: We’ve been officially dating for 7 months, but we’ve known each other since college. I’ve been babysitting for about four months now. I have two kids — a 15-year-old daughter, and a 19 year daughter away at college, with my ex-husband. I was also briefly married right out of high school/in freshman year college (young and dumb, so I don’t really count that one..).

OK but his kids haven't known you since college. And nothing you said changes the fact that you're free, a convenient way for him to dump his kids and avoid responsibility. Do you all live together?

No, we don’t live together. He’s very busy with work, including during weekends, which is why he asked me to babysit. The kids mother, doesn’t mind.

He could make choices about his schedule to be more available, he just doesn't want to do it. He's using you and you are letting him. I'd be very suspicious about what he's actually doing "at work" overnight on the weekend.

Me too. Guarantee he is not actually working. But even if he is, the kids need to either go to their moms or he needs to pay a babysitter.

[Anonymous]

What is the age difference between you two? What does he do for work? How often has he asked you to babysit since that initial ask?

[Anonymous]

You are so creative with all your posts. What do you think you should do?

[Anonymous]

Say no more often. You're being taken advantage of.

[Anonymous]

So he is using you as free labor to get out of paying more child support to the mom of his children?

DTMFA.

[Anonymous]

Ive been with my bf for 18 months. He has 8 and 10 year olds and we are just starting to talk about me meeting them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No way. He is taking advantage of you.

+1 why bother paying someone when he can get his gf, whom he hasn't talked about marrying, to do it for free.

[Anonymous]

Stop being a free babysitter

[Anonymous]

OP - are you older than him ?

He needs to pay child support or pay you for baby sitting

But I wouldn’t have babysit anyway. I would devoted my free time on weekends to do something bonding with my own kids. Your child are still young. Teens and young adolescents need a lot of emotional and financial support. You could instead take your 15 yo hiking , and call your child in college have a long chat how they are doing, their dating troubles etc.

Seriously, invest time in your own kids. Telling you this a mom who made a mistake of prioritizing dating and now has a very depressed young adult son in college