How often do you communicate with your child in college?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The responses to this thread are crazy! People really communicate with their college kids daily?? Wow

Yes, I love my kids and love talking to them. What’s wrong with that??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Daughter: often text multiple times a day. Call two or three times a week. Sometimes go a few dayx without contact if we are all busy.

Son: once a week if we are lucky.

Our DS is close to this. We text about packages that have been or things we see in the student newspaper. Sometimes call.

Responds about 20% of the time. Doesn’t feel the need for daily communication but does like to share every now and then. Not very responsive to our inquiries.

He seems to be doing well on his own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Girl: calls most days 2-4 times a day, often while walking to class (until she runs into a friend and then hops off) or while throwing laundry in washer/changing it to dryer, etc., texts tons (pic of food, quick msg (“just took a spin class”) type
Of thing

This is similar to my freshman daughter who’s having a great year at Northwestern

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boy. Texts a couple times a week. Maybe 1-2 calls a week. I still wonder if that’s helicoptering but this isn’t 1990 when we called our parents once a week.

Too bad!

You do not need to talk to your adult children every day.

Clearly you don’t have a close family.

[Anonymous]

I'd say we text every other day or so. Mostly it's just him asking questions (I got this charge on my account. Do you want me to pay it?), making observations (My lit professor was legit high in class today), sending memes. He probably calls once a week (he FaceTimes the dog

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The responses to this thread are crazy! People really communicate with their college kids daily?? Wow

Apparently multiple times a day. Not sure how everyone has time for that but they do

I work two jobs and even I have time for that. How long does it take to send a text?

[Anonymous]

My son who is a sophomore and NOT a chatty Cathy, we text once a day, usually I send a “have a great day” text around midday, and he replies. Sometimes he tells me “I need new tshirts” or “my shower curtain is moldy, what should I do?” He is generally pretty happy in school and pretty self sufficient. He will text or call if he needs something.

We FaceTime for about 10 minutes once a week, usually on Sundays.

With DD who is a high school senior, I hope it will be slightly more. 😅

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Daily in one way or another

May I ask what is being discussed daily? I am not asking in a rude way at all.

Feelings, problems, venting about classmates or professors, politics, plans, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boy. Texts a couple times a week. Maybe 1-2 calls a week. I still wonder if that’s helicoptering but this isn’t 1990 when we called our parents once a week.

Too bad!

You do not need to talk to your adult children every day.

What are we supposed to do? Ignore them? Most of the time it is my kids reaching out daily in some way or another.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Boy. Texts a couple times a week. Maybe 1-2 calls a week. I still wonder if that’s helicoptering but this isn’t 1990 when we called our parents once a week.

Too bad!

You do not need to talk to your adult children every day.

Clearly you don’t have a close family.

People’s opinions will be all over the map about this, because it is kid-specific and family-specific. We may be more enmeshed in our kids’ college lives than our parents were in ours. Not sure if it’s all healthy. At the same time, our kids are dealing with stressors and issues that most of us did not have to deal with. Everyone is trying to figure out a balance or the best way to launch.

[Anonymous]

I'm happy my kid still likes me after the teenage years and vice versa. We talk maybe once a week and text every other day or so.

[Anonymous]

I do think it’s sign of closeness if you are in daily/every other day contact with a family member.

This isn’t an aunt. It’s your children. If you aren’t close to them now, don’t expect to be in ten years.

[Anonymous]

Sophomore son: Every day just about via text. I let him initiate most of the time and it is usually something like "It is so cold here" or a nice picture from campus or something. Casual but nice to check in often. Actual call about once every 10 days or so.

[Anonymous]

DD, multiple times per day via FT, chat and audio calls. Nothing urgent ever, we’re just in each other’s lives. She’s also the one who keeps the family group chat going.

DS, a few times per week via text, maybe every 7-10 days a call or FT.

We let them set the rhythm.

[Anonymous]

Daughter texts maybe 2-3 times a week. Either a question one of us has or just to tell me good news. Pretty sure she is texting her little sister a bit more often, which I think is as it should be. I believe I only called home once a week when I was in college, so this feels normal to me.
Side note I know a teen boy who FaceTimes his college sister every Friday after school —a standing arrangement they have— and it’s super sweet— he’ll tell me how much he is looking forward to their weekly conversation.