I deserve better

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify I got the message late because I was tired from Thanksgiving travel and took a nap. But I don’t get why it would be so hard for him to make birthday plans a few days in advance?

Get over "plans" and try to be more spontanious! Good lord!
Plans are sooooo boomerish and decades ago.

Total BS. People wouldn't be able to plan anything for their lives if they do everything last minute.

That's the whole point that is lost on you. Boring people plan everything out.
It's made fun of in movies, etc. "Ok honey, I have our trip planned out, every stop, every sight, every restroom break! We have to stay on schedule!"

People like that are no fun to be around. OP sounds like might be one of those people. She should go over to her BF's and hang out with him and then they can have some awesome sex after the party. But noooo, she just wants to skulk and gripe and probably stuff her face with junk food. That gets you nowhere.

It's giving unreliable...

And OP going to his place to "hang out" on HER birthday is not really a plan. It is actually very homey and boring. In any large city you have to plan interesting things ahead of time: buy tickets, book restaurants for Friday-Sat night.
Her BF is cheap and uninventive and he tries to mask it under "lets not be boring babe" disguise

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today’s my birthday. I told my boyfriend a week in advance I’d like him to come over today and spend time at my place for my bday. he said he didn’t know if he was free.

I was disappointed and have been taking space this week assuming we won’t see each other. he texted this afternoon asking if I could come over because he wanted to cook me a nice bday dinner.
I didn’t see it til a few hours later and said ok.

Then he says he hadn’t heard from me all day so now he made plans to play video games with his friends. I deserve better.

You do. So what are you going to do about it?

This ..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea, this is your fault. It's your birthday and you didn't look at your phone for hours to see if you'd hear from your boyfriend? That's odd.

No. It's his fault. She communicated, a week ago, that she'd like to spend time. He didn't make it a priority. He waited until the day of, probably to see if something better would come along. He's 100% treating her like he could take it/leave it.

Leave him, OP. He sucks, and you do deserve better. Don't settle.

That's how one becomes a bitter old cat lady yelling at kids on their lawn.

There are tons of unhappily married women on this board who settled for men like this boyfriend and they are very defensive — they feel trapped and are triggered by the OP’s ability to walk away. (Case in point the PP)

Maybe tge OP will meet someone else or maybe she won’t. I will say that the never married single women with cats tend to be a lot more fulfilled with friends and hobbies than the women who are attached to fat balding men who treat them like bang maids. The loneliness and self esteem loss in these marriages is its own hell.

If women wouldn't let themselves go and get all fat, then they could keep a hot man. I never eat carbs and stay fit so my man has to as well. Set an example!

Most women now are just lazy and spoiled and want it all and give nothing in return, so it's no wonder they cannot get a good man.

or when they do, they can't appreciate a good man and take him for granted. I came across this thread and it is an interesting one to read on people's value and what they care:

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1303438.page

[Anonymous]

Yes, he's not organized and doesn't understand what a relationship entails. Drop him now before you waste anymore of your life, OP.

[Anonymous]

I have a daughter and a son. I plan on telling both of them often that it’s far better to be single than to be with the wrong person. Some one who doesn’t know if they are busy on your birthday until day of is the wrong person (unless they are on call or something which OPs boyfriend is clearly not).

OP I hope you were not alone because you were hoping this guy would show up for you. That happened to me a few times when I was dating but never on an important date like a birthday.

[Anonymous]

First of all, Happy Birthday 🎉 🎁 to you today OP!!

And as a birthday gift to yourself - - you may consider unhitching yourself from this immature + thoughtless rat.

You can do much better on your own and good for you for realizing this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify I got the message late because I was tired from Thanksgiving travel and took a nap. But I don’t get why it would be so hard for him to make birthday plans a few days in advance?

Get over "plans" and try to be more spontanious! Good lord!
Plans are sooooo boomerish and decades ago.

Total BS. People wouldn't be able to plan anything for their lives if they do everything last minute.

That's the whole point that is lost on you. Boring people plan everything out.
It's made fun of in movies, etc. "Ok honey, I have our trip planned out, every stop, every sight, every restroom break! We have to stay on schedule!"

People like that are no fun to be around. OP sounds like might be one of those people. She should go over to her BF's and hang out with him and then they can have some awesome sex after the party. But noooo, she just wants to skulk and gripe and probably stuff her face with junk food. That gets you nowhere.

It's giving unreliable...

And OP going to his place to "hang out" on HER birthday is not really a plan. It is actually very homey and boring. In any large city you have to plan interesting things ahead of time: buy tickets, book restaurants for Friday-Sat night.
Her BF is cheap and uninventive and he tries to mask it under "lets not be boring babe" disguise

You sound high-maintenance and expensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify I got the message late because I was tired from Thanksgiving travel and took a nap. But I don’t get why it would be so hard for him to make birthday plans a few days in advance?

Get over "plans" and try to be more spontanious! Good lord!
Plans are sooooo boomerish and decades ago.

Total BS. People wouldn't be able to plan anything for their lives if they do everything last minute.

That's the whole point that is lost on you. Boring people plan everything out.
It's made fun of in movies, etc. "Ok honey, I have our trip planned out, every stop, every sight, every restroom break! We have to stay on schedule!"

People like that are no fun to be around. OP sounds like might be one of those people. She should go over to her BF's and hang out with him and then they can have some awesome sex after the party. But noooo, she just wants to skulk and gripe and probably stuff her face with junk food. That gets you nowhere.

It's giving unreliable...

And OP going to his place to "hang out" on HER birthday is not really a plan. It is actually very homey and boring. In any large city you have to plan interesting things ahead of time: buy tickets, book restaurants for Friday-Sat night.
Her BF is cheap and uninventive and he tries to mask it under "lets not be boring babe" disguise

You sound high-maintenance and expensive.

As she should be. What’s the point of having a boyfriend if he just wants to sit around and “hang out”? Easier to just watch Netflix alone and use a vibrator.

So weird to me that men don’t want an actual relationship. Just go hang out with your buddies if you’re so low energy.

[Anonymous]

His behavior is not justifiable. But OP - this didn’t happen in a vacuum, did it? Why are you still with him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify I got the message late because I was tired from Thanksgiving travel and took a nap. But I don’t get why it would be so hard for him to make birthday plans a few days in advance?

Get over "plans" and try to be more spontanious! Good lord!
Plans are sooooo boomerish and decades ago.

Total BS. People wouldn't be able to plan anything for their lives if they do everything last minute.

That's the whole point that is lost on you. Boring people plan everything out.
It's made fun of in movies, etc. "Ok honey, I have our trip planned out, every stop, every sight, every restroom break! We have to stay on schedule!"

People like that are no fun to be around. OP sounds like might be one of those people. She should go over to her BF's and hang out with him and then they can have some awesome sex after the party. But noooo, she just wants to skulk and gripe and probably stuff her face with junk food. That gets you nowhere.

It's giving unreliable...

And OP going to his place to "hang out" on HER birthday is not really a plan. It is actually very homey and boring. In any large city you have to plan interesting things ahead of time: buy tickets, book restaurants for Friday-Sat night.
Her BF is cheap and uninventive and he tries to mask it under "lets not be boring babe" disguise

You sound high-maintenance and expensive.

As she should be. What’s the point of having a boyfriend if he just wants to sit around and “hang out”? Easier to just watch Netflix alone and use a vibrator.

So weird to me that men don’t want an actual relationship. Just go hang out with your buddies if you’re so low energy.

Why would they, if they had to put up with women that had attitudes like you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. To clarify I got the message late because I was tired from Thanksgiving travel and took a nap. But I don’t get why it would be so hard for him to make birthday plans a few days in advance?

Get over "plans" and try to be more spontanious! Good lord!
Plans are sooooo boomerish and decades ago.

Total BS. People wouldn't be able to plan anything for their lives if they do everything last minute.

That's the whole point that is lost on you. Boring people plan everything out.
It's made fun of in movies, etc. "Ok honey, I have our trip planned out, every stop, every sight, every restroom break! We have to stay on schedule!"

People like that are no fun to be around. OP sounds like might be one of those people. She should go over to her BF's and hang out with him and then they can have some awesome sex after the party. But noooo, she just wants to skulk and gripe and probably stuff her face with junk food. That gets you nowhere.

It's giving unreliable...

And OP going to his place to "hang out" on HER birthday is not really a plan. It is actually very homey and boring. In any large city you have to plan interesting things ahead of time: buy tickets, book restaurants for Friday-Sat night.
Her BF is cheap and uninventive and he tries to mask it under "lets not be boring babe" disguise

You sound high-maintenance and expensive.

As she should be. What’s the point of having a boyfriend if he just wants to sit around and “hang out”? Easier to just watch Netflix alone and use a vibrator.

So weird to me that men don’t want an actual relationship. Just go hang out with your buddies if you’re so low energy.

Why would they, if they had to put up with women that had attitudes like you?

Eh. I have a boyfriend who’s a 6666. He’s with me because he wanted someone to go do stuff with. So we go out every weekend, go on weekend trips, etc. We’d both be VERY unhappy in a relationship that was just “come over and hang out”. And we do nice things for each other because that’s what couples do.

Doesn’t really make any sense to be in a relationship with someone you want to treat like a housecat. Get a plant or whatever if you just want a decoration with minimal involvement.

[Anonymous]

If he liked you he would have made plans in advance to make your birthday as special as possible. You have low self esteem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Today’s my birthday. I told my boyfriend a week in advance I’d like him to come over today and spend time at my place for my bday. he said he didn’t know if he was free.

I was disappointed and have been taking space this week assuming we won’t see each other. he texted this afternoon asking if I could come over because he wanted to cook me a nice bday dinner.
I didn’t see it til a few hours later and said ok.

Then he says he hadn’t heard from me all day so now he made plans to play video games with his friends. I deserve better.

Girl let me explain what happened here.

First, you are dating a dusty-@$$ manchild. He is not going to change. It is dating 101 that you do something nice on your partner’s birthday. He knows this.

“I don’t know if I’m free” means he was free but was waiting to see if a better option came along.

You distanced yourself, which made him panic and try to reel you back in. So then he pulls the “I want to cook for you!” BS.

He was NEVER gonna cook for you. Even if you had responded immediately, he would have done the “oops sorry didn’t see your response!”

There are only 2 correct options here:

1. You dump him (preferred)
2. On your birthday, because he said he was busy, you should have put on your skankiest dress, gone out with your girlfriends, and post a ton of pictures to your IG stories.

May not be too late for that. Get dressed up and take a mirror selfie, even if you don’t go out. Then turn your phone off the rest of the night. Leave it off until at least 2pm tomorrow. Then when you see his texts of “where are you?” just respond “sorry crazy night!”

Then dump him, LOL. Take it from an old lady, men don’t suddenly change. The best thing to do is end things the second they stop putting in effort.

This is so painfully accurate.

[Anonymous]

OP - you should have dumped him right on a spot when he said he wasn’t sure about his availability on your BD. He clearly is sleeping with other women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Guy here, and as you didn't respond he has the right to make other plans.

But you should dump him simply for the fact he made plans to play video games.

Absurd. Video games are not any less valid than watching sports and yet I don’t see anyone saying that a woman should automatically dump a guy who watches football.