How to date while high maintenance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your best bet is to be yourself. Always go on dates with full makeup, perfect hair, manicure/pedicure, heels, fancy clothing.

Some men really appreciate a girly girl who always looks perfect by their side. Don’t downplay this part of your personality and make sure it is something he appreciates.

I don’t really do makeup, nails, or hair much. My high maintenance is subscriptions, massages, a house cleaner, etc.

Lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's not about individual things on your list, OP but rather the attitude. What do you envision will happen when you're married with kids? Someone will have to make food for the children, you will not be able to travel as easily, and your time may be severely curtailed such that massages will be out of the question.

The reason people are confused is that it's not about being "high-maintenance". It's about presenting yourself as possibly rigid in your lifestyle. Dating and marriage require adaptability. You can't just add someone to your life and not expect it to change considerably, even if it's just one mature adult.

I will be a mother first. That includes cooking, cleaning up after kids, limiting travel, limiting massages to be with them, and making all the necessary cuts to be the best mom to them.

I did the cooking and cleaning when I couldn’t afford to outsource. I’m taking advantage of it now knowing that it may change or stop once I’m married and have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you fat? I know it sounds superficial, but lots of guys care more about that than whether a woman pays for a cleaning service or uses meal kits.

No. Petite with a slender frame and ample breasts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you fat? I know it sounds superficial, but lots of guys care more about that than whether a woman pays for a cleaning service or uses meal kits.

No. Petite with a slender frame and ample breasts.

Sound fabulous to me. How ample? Cup size… 🙏

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It's not about individual things on your list, OP but rather the attitude. What do you envision will happen when you're married with kids? Someone will have to make food for the children, you will not be able to travel as easily, and your time may be severely curtailed such that massages will be out of the question.

The reason people are confused is that it's not about being "high-maintenance". It's about presenting yourself as possibly rigid in your lifestyle. Dating and marriage require adaptability. You can't just add someone to your life and not expect it to change considerably, even if it's just one mature adult.

I will be a mother first. That includes cooking, cleaning up after kids, limiting travel, limiting massages to be with them, and making all the necessary cuts to be the best mom to them.

I did the cooking and cleaning when I couldn’t afford to outsource. I’m taking advantage of it now knowing that it may change or stop once I’m married and have kids.

I already told you this was totally fine as a high earning woman- if you're thin and good looking and not finding luck in dating it's not these "high maintenance " things you list (which I really don’t think are that high maintenance for someone making good money and working long hours.) I was arguably much higher maintenance (I did want the hair and nails and botox etc!) Knew how to cook but also had to mail it in occasionally with 75+ hr weeks and had no issues finding dates and a husband. You're fine. If this is an issue for you you need to figure out why that is, but I promise in a city likr DC it's not the cleaning service or meal kits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your best bet is to be yourself. Always go on dates with full makeup, perfect hair, manicure/pedicure, heels, fancy clothing.

Some men really appreciate a girly girl who always looks perfect by their side. Don’t downplay this part of your personality and make sure it is something he appreciates.

+2

I’m high maintenance and never downplayed this. I always had a date/boyfriend (am married now, still high maintenance).

[Anonymous]

I had a roommate in college who was overweight, super high maintenance in the way you describe (i.e. a spoiled princess from a rich family) and basically a sexual (never dated and had zero interest in men, virginity intact through her 20s) and she ended up getting married in her early 30s to a RICH GUY! So who knows.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It's not about individual things on your list, OP but rather the attitude. What do you envision will happen when you're married with kids? Someone will have to make food for the children, you will not be able to travel as easily, and your time may be severely curtailed such that massages will be out of the question.

The reason people are confused is that it's not about being "high-maintenance". It's about presenting yourself as possibly rigid in your lifestyle. Dating and marriage require adaptability. You can't just add someone to your life and not expect it to change considerably, even if it's just one mature adult.

I will be a mother first. That includes cooking, cleaning up after kids, limiting travel, limiting massages to be with them, and making all the necessary cuts to be the best mom to them.

I did the cooking and cleaning when I couldn’t afford to outsource. I’m taking advantage of it now knowing that it may change or stop once I’m married and have kids.

Well then, as long as you express to any significant other that this is a temporary breather, fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your best bet is to be yourself. Always go on dates with full makeup, perfect hair, manicure/pedicure, heels, fancy clothing.

Some men really appreciate a girly girl who always looks perfect by their side. Don’t downplay this part of your personality and make sure it is something he appreciates.

I don't think that's what she means by "high maintenance".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m 31 and really want to marry and have a family. Admittedly, I’m high maintenance. I’m aware but do not plan to change this because that’s what works for me. Am I a lost cause or is this still hope to find a man?

Depends on what you mean by high maintenance.. If it is financial (you spend a bunch on things), that's minor. If, on the other hand, you are a bi**h, no sense of humor, think and act like you are better than your spouse, etc. most men who are in your age bracket won't put up with that. I mean, some betas would, but in general a man who's close to 35, unmarried or divorced has no reason to add a high maintenance partner to his daily routine.

Other than that, if you take care of yourself, and take care of your future DH and are generally good looking & personable, I don't see why you shouldn't be able to find a good man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you fat? I know it sounds superficial, but lots of guys care more about that than whether a woman pays for a cleaning service or uses meal kits.

No. Petite with a slender frame and ample breasts.

Sound fabulous to me. How ample? Cup size… 🙏

36C

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a roommate in college who was overweight, super high maintenance in the way you describe (i.e. a spoiled princess from a rich family) and basically a sexual (never dated and had zero interest in men, virginity intact through her 20s) and she ended up getting married in her early 30s to a RICH GUY! So who knows.

I’m not overweight, didn’t come from a rich family, and definitely no virgin.

[Anonymous]

Adopt the cats, you are a lost cause.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you fat? I know it sounds superficial, but lots of guys care more about that than whether a woman pays for a cleaning service or uses meal kits.

No. Petite with a slender frame and ample breasts.

Sound fabulous to me. How ample? Cup size… 🙏

36C

Nice!

[Anonymous]

The most important thing is to be honest and be yourself. The right person will like you the way you are.