Husband and I fighting over moving

[Anonymous]

Do you work? How will your commute be affected? What's your childcare plan? Do you plan to have more than one kid?

I mean, there's really no way for anyone to answer that question for you, but generally I'd say it makes sense to own something rather than keep renting because you don't have any equity in your current place, but if it increased your commute by an hour it might not make sense now.

Do you not have a life plan? It sounds like you're surprised to find yourself pregnant?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I have rented in this luxury high rise for the past year. We pay a huge premium to live here. It’s been really nice but the unit itself is not super big - 1200-1300sqft. There are so many incredible amenities - close to work, stores, restaurants, huge gym + pool in building, and multiple work spaces within in the building. They even have a children’s area. We found out last month that we are expecting and my husband now wants to move to a condo or townhome with much more room. He’s been scouting out condos and the like and have found some nice 3bd places with more square footage. I’m super happy here but my husband is insistent we move because we will outgrow the space very quickly.
He’s ready to put an offer in on a certain property. It will be cheaper to pay a mortgage.

I’ve always been super indecisive and not great with change. What are your thoughts on this? Am I naive to think we can make it work in this small space? Is moving more wise? Should I stick to my guns and not move?

Imho if it gives you more space for less or even same money and payment is building equity then he is making a wise decision. Change is tough but inevitable so get on with the process. Its easier to move before baby than it is with a baby. Good luck with new place and new baby.

My reasons for not moving are

- We will not stay in a condo or townhome for more than 3 years. Maybe 4 max. We will eventually want a house.

- The one he likes the most is about what we pay here now. I know that equity is important but it feels like we lose money if we don’t stay for 5+ years in a new place.

- Longer commute to work. Not ideal.

This should not be underestimated. Is it also a longer drive for childcare or will you have a nanny?

[Anonymous]

Do share back on if you move or stay put.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you work? How will your commute be affected? What's your childcare plan? Do you plan to have more than one kid?

I mean, there's really no way for anyone to answer that question for you, but generally I'd say it makes sense to own something rather than keep renting because you don't have any equity in your current place, but if it increased your commute by an hour it might not make sense now.

Do you not have a life plan? It sounds like you're surprised to find yourself pregnant?

I didn’t know this thread was still going.

I work. My commute is a 5 minute walk and will turn into a 20 minute drive. We will probably hire a nanny. We want another child.

We wanted kids but we weren’t sure how long it would take. I got my iud removed and got pregnant right away. We just weren’t expecting it to be that soon. It’s not an issue but we expected it may take months to get pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Do share back on if you move or stay put.

We have decided to move if our offer gets accepted. It’s a much bigger space. We will have room for guests.

My husband did make a point that almost no one seems to use the children’s room and we have used the work space like 10 times in the 2 years we have lived here. The one thing I will miss is proximity to stores, work, and the gym.

We decided to get a membership to a nice gym close to the new place, there are some stores and we can have groceries delivered, and commute is not that bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You posted this before.

I haven’t. Must have been someone else.

Are you sure?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1086255.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You posted this before.

I haven’t. Must have been someone else.

Are you sure?

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1086255.page

That was over 3 years ago not even the same details. Op said they are already in a 2bd and looking at 3bd.

She hasn’t said anything about her husband being upset or mad.

Why you do concerned with what people post on here? I’m sure you can find something better to do with your time than searching for posts over 2 years old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whenever husband and wife are not mutually agree on something, then husband has the tie breaking authority, scripture makes it clear

GO AWAY

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whenever husband and wife are not mutually agree on something, then husband has the tie breaking authority, scripture makes it clear

GO AWAY

OP here. It’s a good thing we aren’t religious lol. My husband and I make decisions together. He doesn’t get the last say just because he’s the man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Do share back on if you move or stay put.

We have decided to move if our offer gets accepted. It’s a much bigger space. We will have room for guests.

My husband did make a point that almost no one seems to use the children’s room and we have used the work space like 10 times in the 2 years we have lived here. The one thing I will miss is proximity to stores, work, and the gym.

We decided to get a membership to a nice gym close to the new place, there are some stores and we can have groceries delivered, and commute is not that bad.

Congratulations on that new home!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let your husband be the boss. He's the breadwinner after all. Now that you are expectinf, you should be preparing for your new role as a mother.

Where is the vomit emoji?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I have rented in this luxury high rise for the past year. We pay a huge premium to live here. It’s been really nice but the unit itself is not super big - 1200-1300sqft. There are so many incredible amenities - close to work, stores, restaurants, huge gym + pool in building, and multiple work spaces within in the building. They even have a children’s area. We found out last month that we are expecting and my husband now wants to move to a condo or townhome with much more room. He’s been scouting out condos and the like and have found some nice 3bd places with more square footage. I’m super happy here but my husband is insistent we move because we will outgrow the space very quickly.
He’s ready to put an offer in on a certain property. It will be cheaper to pay a mortgage.

I’ve always been super indecisive and not great with change. What are your thoughts on this? Am I naive to think we can make it work in this small space? Is moving more wise? Should I stick to my guns and not move?

Imho if it gives you more space for less or even same money and payment is building equity then he is making a wise decision. Change is tough but inevitable so get on with the process. Its easier to move before baby than it is with a baby. Good luck with new place and new baby.

My reasons for not moving are

- We will not stay in a condo or townhome for more than 3 years. Maybe 4 max. We will eventually want a house.

- The one he likes the most is about what we pay here now. I know that equity is important but it feels like we lose money if we don’t stay for 5+ years in a new place.

- Longer commute to work. Not ideal.

2 or 3 bedrooms in a townhouse is not worth moving. Just wait until you’re ready for a house.

Personally I think townhouses are the worst of both worlds when you have young kids. You’re going to have park in the street and schlep car seats and groceries up a billion stairs. All the stairs are horrible when you have a crawling baby. If you have covered parking and an elevator, don’t give that up for constant stress over street parking. Plus, after the baby is born you’ll have a much brides of what you actually NEED in a family home.

Buy a house or stay where you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband and I have rented in this luxury high rise for the past year. We pay a huge premium to live here. It’s been really nice but the unit itself is not super big - 1200-1300sqft. There are so many incredible amenities - close to work, stores, restaurants, huge gym + pool in building, and multiple work spaces within in the building. They even have a children’s area. We found out last month that we are expecting and my husband now wants to move to a condo or townhome with much more room. He’s been scouting out condos and the like and have found some nice 3bd places with more square footage. I’m super happy here but my husband is insistent we move because we will outgrow the space very quickly.
He’s ready to put an offer in on a certain property. It will be cheaper to pay a mortgage.

I’ve always been super indecisive and not great with change. What are your thoughts on this? Am I naive to think we can make it work in this small space? Is moving more wise? Should I stick to my guns and not move?

Imho if it gives you more space for less or even same money and payment is building equity then he is making a wise decision. Change is tough but inevitable so get on with the process. Its easier to move before baby than it is with a baby. Good luck with new place and new baby.

My reasons for not moving are

- We will not stay in a condo or townhome for more than 3 years. Maybe 4 max. We will eventually want a house.

- The one he likes the most is about what we pay here now. I know that equity is important but it feels like we lose money if we don’t stay for 5+ years in a new place.

- Longer commute to work. Not ideal.

2 or 3 bedrooms in a townhouse is not worth moving. Just wait until you’re ready for a house.

Personally I think townhouses are the worst of both worlds when you have young kids. You’re going to have park in the street and schlep car seats and groceries up a billion stairs. All the stairs are horrible when you have a crawling baby. If you have covered parking and an elevator, don’t give that up for constant stress over street parking. Plus, after the baby is born you’ll have a much brides of what you actually NEED in a family home.

Buy a house or stay where you are.

Townhouse vary greatly. Mine has an attached two car garage and far more room than many SFHs.