Son starting to go over a girl’s house….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach him to reciprocate, with consent of course.

The consent really needs to be in writing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teach him to reciprocate, with consent of course.

And teachers your daughters to say me first then maybe I will reciprocate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just for him to be polite, personable. Manners, say please and thank you and make eye contact, say hello and goodbye. Clean up after yourself. Usual stuff.

This. No sex.

Why not?

NP. Because they are rising freshman…so that makes them 14. Too young for sex.
Sure it may happen, and you should teach safety around that, but I would also say they shouldn’t be having sex at this age and it can come with a lot of emotional complications bc while their bodies may want to, their brains aren’t ready yet.

Way more freshman than you think are having sex. So you have to be prepared. My issues is the amount of oral sex a guy thinks he deserves the first time he hooks up with a girl. I don't remember that being a thing but it def is. D and T pics and videos are also very much happening on Snap, even in middle school.

Yeah parents are kinda clueless on this. Most kids don’t even “go out” anymore like boyfriend and girlfriend. Just a lot of hook ups

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teach him to reciprocate, with consent of course.

The consent really needs to be in writing.

. Doesn't really change anything, pretty easy to say they were forced to write it under duress or false pretense.

[Anonymous]

If it was my daughter, I’d appreciate it if you could enroll your son in a more demanding school, demand stellar academic performance, sign him up for more time-consuming extracurricular activities, and give him more chores to do at home.

All of which is what I’d be doing for her if I found out she had time for “relationships,” “practice intimacy” and similar distractions.

I don’t get the parents who see no problem with young kids getting involved sexually as if there were no potential complications, risks and dangers. Kids aren’t barnyard animals and need to be taught from an early age not just the mechanics of sex but also the associated morality and ethics, which go way beyond “consent,” especially in an age group that the law recognizes as incapable of actually giving any (“Romeo & Juliet” exceptions notwithstanding).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wait. Are you guys seriously suggesting that parents of teens who are dating reach out to each other due to their kids relationships? Please land your helicopters. Teens have been hooking up since the beginning of time. Do not do this. You will create a hostile environment, where your kids won't tell you what they are doing and who they are doing it with, and they'll just do it.

Yes. And not just dating but even friendships or club activities together means that you connect with parents. At the HS level, you should have the phone numbers of kids and parents of most close friends. At college level, phone number of the roommates and their parents.

I live in a diverse community and it is quite common for parents to be in touch with each other. We are not subscribing to broken family or social systems.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh dear. He’s not even a freshman and you’re allowing this crap?

What, exactly, do you imagine the OP is "allowing?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he knows about birth control and other sex ed stuff like consent, not being selfish, etc.

CONDOMS.

OP is a boy-mom and she’s speaking to other boy-moms. Please don’t sugar coat this issue; say the word: CONDOMS. People: buy your sons some condoms. Don’t just buy a lame 3-pack; that is used up in one night. Buy a dozen and make sure he knows about them.

My son buys himself all his clothes, he goes to giant and buys himself snacks, he buys his own deodorant and gets his hair cut. Is there a reason he can’t buy his own condoms? They don’t check ID, do they?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh dear. He’s not even a freshman and you’re allowing this crap?

What, exactly, do you imagine the OP is "allowing?"

Allowing him to go over to a girl’s house one on one in a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. Hell no. Weekdays are for homework and/or activities and weekends are family time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If it was my daughter, I’d appreciate it if you could enroll your son in a more demanding school, demand stellar academic performance, sign him up for more time-consuming extracurricular activities, and give him more chores to do at home.

All of which is what I’d be doing for her if I found out she had time for “relationships,” “practice intimacy” and similar distractions.

I don’t get the parents who see no problem with young kids getting involved sexually as if there were no potential complications, risks and dangers. Kids aren’t barnyard animals and need to be taught from an early age not just the mechanics of sex but also the associated morality and ethics, which go way beyond “consent,” especially in an age group that the law recognizes as incapable of actually giving any (“Romeo & Juliet” exceptions notwithstanding).

Your looking for a guy in finance, 6’5”, blue eyes, trust fund.

[Anonymous]

Yes. When my now 17 started hanging out with her boyfriend (she was 14.5) and he invited her to his house, his mom texted me, introduced herself and told me she was going to be there, working. They were together for 2.5 years and we had a goos relationship with his parents, not close by any means, just communicative.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wait. Are you guys seriously suggesting that parents of teens who are dating reach out to each other due to their kids relationships? Please land your helicopters. Teens have been hooking up since the beginning of time. Do not do this. You will create a hostile environment, where your kids won't tell you what they are doing and who they are doing it with, and they'll just do it.

Yes. And not just dating but even friendships or club activities together means that you connect with parents. At the HS level, you should have the phone numbers of kids and parents of most close friends. At college level, phone number of the roommates and their parents.

I live in a diverse community and it is quite common for parents to be in touch with each other. We are not subscribing to broken family or social systems.

H E L I C O P T E R

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh dear. He’s not even a freshman and you’re allowing this crap?

What, exactly, do you imagine the OP is "allowing?"

Allowing him to go over to a girl’s house one on one in a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. Hell no. Weekdays are for homework and/or activities and weekends are family time.

In what world is a teen only with their family all weekends. Get real sweetie

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Oh dear. He’s not even a freshman and you’re allowing this crap?

What, exactly, do you imagine the OP is "allowing?"

Allowing him to go over to a girl’s house one on one in a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. Hell no. Weekdays are for homework and/or activities and weekends are family time.

+100

The girls parents would appreciate if you kept your boy home

[Anonymous]

1) if it’s clear this is going to continue, def connect with the girls mom. Just to have contact information and to let you know if there are issues.

2) educate him on BC/safe sex (as I’d do for my DD).

3) Teach DS to be polite, respectful and all that.