Why are men still expected to make the first move?

[Anonymous]

I'm a woman who likes the idea of asking out men. But the reality is that men will generally pursue the women who interest them. They will often go along with things if the woman pursues them, but they might not be that interested and it might not go well for the woman in the long run. So I prefer it when men pursue me, because then I know they are actually interested and not just going along with things because it's easy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I made the first move on my husband. We had been friends for a couple of years and finally I decided to do something about it. That was 34 years ago.

Did you ask him out first or just express feelings for him first

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a feminist and believe women can and should ask men out… however, I never have. I like a man to show the confidence and wit and initiative it takes to ask me out. I expect to have to show the wit and intelligence to interact in such a way that he wants to ask me out. I also like a man who sometimes likes to be dominant in bed. My desire is very responsive to being desired (like most women, for better or worse). Meek, shy men can’t do this for me.

You are not a feminist. Feminists will go crazy when they hear you say thinks like you want your man to be dominant in bed

You don’t get to gatekeeper feminism, whether your comment was tongue in cheek or not.

NP here. We actually do get to gatekeep feminism and based on your initial comment you are not a feminist.

NP.
Let me help you out since you seem to be struggling with basic concepts:

fem·i·nism
noun
the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

Don’t you dare shame women for wanting a man to ask them out or even to be dominant in bed. Next you will be advocating for women to not be allowed to stay home with kids or cook dinner even if they want to. If you’re not joking, you’ve gone off the deep end. No wonder men suck so bad nowadays.
-signed progressive feminist

Same poster. You are also not a feminist. PP can want a man to ask her out. That's not feminist. Nothing in her post is feminist. That's okay not all women are feminists.

DP. I agree that you don't know what a "feminist" is.

People are welcome to their preferences. That has no bearing on their attitudes/beliefs. Feminists believe in equity/equality - meaning your preferences and choices should not be imposed on others.

There is nothing anti-feminist about the PP's preferences as long as she doesn't think only men should do the asking/pursuing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a woman who likes the idea of asking out men. But the reality is that men will generally pursue the women who interest them. They will often go along with things if the woman pursues them, but they might not be that interested and it might not go well for the woman in the long run. So I prefer it when men pursue me, because then I know they are actually interested and not just going along with things because it's easy.

This. It's to avoid passive men, men who aren't really that into you, and men who only want a relationship if the woman does all the work. It's a very, very low bar it's an important one that some men fail to clear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a woman who likes the idea of asking out men. But the reality is that men will generally pursue the women who interest them. They will often go along with things if the woman pursues them, but they might not be that interested and it might not go well for the woman in the long run. So I prefer it when men pursue me, because then I know they are actually interested and not just going along with things because it's easy.

This. It's to avoid passive men, men who aren't really that into you, and men who only want a relationship if the woman does all the work. It's a very, very low bar it's an important one that some men fail to clear.

And men are always expected to do all the work and people on society say men are not supposed to view it as work or they're supposed to view it as a joy which I never understood

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a feminist and believe women can and should ask men out… however, I never have. I like a man to show the confidence and wit and initiative it takes to ask me out. I expect to have to show the wit and intelligence to interact in such a way that he wants to ask me out. I also like a man who sometimes likes to be dominant in bed. My desire is very responsive to being desired (like most women, for better or worse). Meek, shy men can’t do this for me.

You are not a feminist. Feminists will go crazy when they hear you say thinks like you want your man to be dominant in bed

You don’t get to gatekeeper feminism, whether your comment was tongue in cheek or not.

NP here. We actually do get to gatekeep feminism and based on your initial comment you are not a feminist.

NP.
Let me help you out since you seem to be struggling with basic concepts:

fem·i·nism
noun
the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

Don’t you dare shame women for wanting a man to ask them out or even to be dominant in bed. Next you will be advocating for women to not be allowed to stay home with kids or cook dinner even if they want to. If you’re not joking, you’ve gone off the deep end. No wonder men suck so bad nowadays.
-signed progressive feminist

I'm with you, PP. I'm a self made successful female in my 40s. Men feel emasculated in RL situations but I'm deeply submissive in the bedroom. I dream of just falling in his hands at night and let him do anything he wants. It's so relaxing and enjoyable! Has nothing to do with feminism

[Anonymous]

Nevertheless I don't see this ever be coming more even I always see this being one-sided

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a feminist and believe women can and should ask men out… however, I never have. I like a man to show the confidence and wit and initiative it takes to ask me out. I expect to have to show the wit and intelligence to interact in such a way that he wants to ask me out. I also like a man who sometimes likes to be dominant in bed. My desire is very responsive to being desired (like most women, for better or worse). Meek, shy men can’t do this for me.

You are not a feminist. Feminists will go crazy when they hear you say thinks like you want your man to be dominant in bed

You don’t get to gatekeeper feminism, whether your comment was tongue in cheek or not.

NP here. We actually do get to gatekeep feminism and based on your initial comment you are not a feminist.

NP.
Let me help you out since you seem to be struggling with basic concepts:

fem·i·nism
noun
the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

Don’t you dare shame women for wanting a man to ask them out or even to be dominant in bed. Next you will be advocating for women to not be allowed to stay home with kids or cook dinner even if they want to. If you’re not joking, you’ve gone off the deep end. No wonder men suck so bad nowadays.
-signed progressive feminist

I'm with you, PP. I'm a self made successful female in my 40s. Men feel emasculated in RL situations but I'm deeply submissive in the bedroom. I dream of just falling in his hands at night and let him do anything he wants. It's so relaxing and enjoyable! Has nothing to do with feminism

Can I have your number? You are my type of women
I love submissive women when it comes to sex they often have the best orgasms

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man here, in 50s, get attention.

Disagree, woman will make the 1st move sometimes. If I was a woman, why on earth wouldn’t I want to do this when others don’t?

Of course, it is nervy.

I'd say women make the first move nearly 100% of the time, and about 90% of the time it ends up with the man asking her out on a date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a feminist and believe women can and should ask men out… however, I never have. I like a man to show the confidence and wit and initiative it takes to ask me out. I expect to have to show the wit and intelligence to interact in such a way that he wants to ask me out. I also like a man who sometimes likes to be dominant in bed. My desire is very responsive to being desired (like most women, for better or worse). Meek, shy men can’t do this for me.

You are not a feminist. Feminists will go crazy when they hear you say thinks like you want your man to be dominant in bed

You don’t get to gatekeeper feminism, whether your comment was tongue in cheek or not.

NP here. We actually do get to gatekeep feminism and based on your initial comment you are not a feminist.

NP.
Let me help you out since you seem to be struggling with basic concepts:

fem·i·nism
noun
the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

Don’t you dare shame women for wanting a man to ask them out or even to be dominant in bed. Next you will be advocating for women to not be allowed to stay home with kids or cook dinner even if they want to. If you’re not joking, you’ve gone off the deep end. No wonder men suck so bad nowadays.
-signed progressive feminist

Same poster. You are also not a feminist. PP can want a man to ask her out. That's not feminist. Nothing in her post is feminist. That's okay not all women are feminists.

You must be young. I'm old enough to remember feminism and not have this confusion the current generations have. Nothing the original PP said goes against feminism. Maybe it's your understanding of it? What's your definition?

It does. It's not feminism. You can think the sky is green and the moon is made of cheese if you want to doesn't make it so.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a feminist and believe women can and should ask men out… however, I never have. I like a man to show the confidence and wit and initiative it takes to ask me out. I expect to have to show the wit and intelligence to interact in such a way that he wants to ask me out. I also like a man who sometimes likes to be dominant in bed. My desire is very responsive to being desired (like most women, for better or worse). Meek, shy men can’t do this for me.

You are not a feminist. Feminists will go crazy when they hear you say thinks like you want your man to be dominant in bed

You don’t get to gatekeeper feminism, whether your comment was tongue in cheek or not.

NP here. We actually do get to gatekeep feminism and based on your initial comment you are not a feminist.

NP.
Let me help you out since you seem to be struggling with basic concepts:

fem·i·nism
noun
the advocacy of women's rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.

Don’t you dare shame women for wanting a man to ask them out or even to be dominant in bed. Next you will be advocating for women to not be allowed to stay home with kids or cook dinner even if they want to. If you’re not joking, you’ve gone off the deep end. No wonder men suck so bad nowadays.
-signed progressive feminist

Same poster. You are also not a feminist. PP can want a man to ask her out. That's not feminist. Nothing in her post is feminist. That's okay not all women are feminists.

DP. I agree that you don't know what a "feminist" is.

People are welcome to their preferences. That has no bearing on their attitudes/beliefs. Feminists believe in equity/equality - meaning your preferences and choices should not be imposed on others.

There is nothing anti-feminist about the PP's preferences as long as she doesn't think only men should do the asking/pursuing.[/quote

Again you can think the moon is made of cheese if you like. Doesn't make it so. You are not a feminist and neither are any of the other pps. That's okay.

[Anonymous]

I'm sure it'll still be this way even a full Century from now or a full Millennium from now, as in, men normally being the ones to make the first move and ask the woman out and be the initiator in starting a relationship

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure it'll still be this way even a full Century from now or a full Millennium from now, as in, men normally being the ones to make the first move and ask the woman out and be the initiator in starting a relationship

They don't make the first move now. That's a myth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re a man and have never had a woman make a first move with you, that’s a you problem. Do you have friends who can tell you the honest truth?

Lol, the vast majority of men will never be approached by a woman no matter how much effort they put in. You have to be really above average looking (genetically speaking) to get approached by women, or simply right place right time and be very lucky. I’ve been with a lot of women but had to make the first move 100% of the time.

Women don’t make the first move for a number of reasons but the biggest is because they don’t have to, men are way hornier and desperate in general so they’re more motivated to risk rejection and embarrassment vs women who naturally have lower sex drives and levels of promiscuity

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm sure it'll still be this way even a full Century from now or a full Millennium from now, as in, men normally being the ones to make the first move and ask the woman out and be the initiator in starting a relationship

They don't make the first move now. That's a myth.

Are you saying women don't? If so yeah then that's how it is normally