How did we survive?

Anonymous
It wasn't that bad because I didn't make it that bad for myself. I didn't virtue signal about "staying indoors" or wearing masks alone in the woods. The biggest change is that I started working from home, and still work from home. And I got a few jabs in my arm.
Nobody I knew died from covid that wasn't already dying of something else. The people I knew that got Covid never got all that sick. I never got covid. The worst thing was during 2020 and some of 2021 it was frustrating when in-person events were canceled which honestly really didn't need to be. I definitely think people in Blue states overreacted and that's why there is such a strong Red tide among typically Blue demographics. I don't think there was a grand government control conspiracy, I think governments just didn't want to admit that they had no clue what they were doing and just wanted to look like they were doing something.
As soon as I got my first vaccine in May 2021, I:
Resumed any and all social activities
Resumed travel, parties, events, dining, you name it
Never wore a mask unless it was absolutely mandatory
Did. Not. Care. about case rates or numbers.
Basically, as soon as I got that vaccine, I lived like it was 2019 again and never looked back. I feel negative shame about this.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:God will never give you more than you can handle.


This statement is far more harmful that helpful.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Recent death in the family?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Beaten by your spouse?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Suffer a racist attack?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING ABOUT EVERYTHING BECAUSE BABIES ARE DYING SOMEWHERE.


Bingo. Stop complaining.

And if you must complain or vent about something relatively trivial, fine, but try not to put it in such grandiose terms like “How did we survive?” And stop referring to WFH and missing one summer vacation as “trauma”. That’s the annoying part.

Also, most the people I know IRL absolutely loved Covid and continue to enjoy its aftermath. This is why DC is a wasteland… we’re all thriving in the tranquility of the suburbs with our friends and families, working half-days and eating noodle salad. Quite content.
Anonymous
There were some people who had it harder than I did during that time and some who had it easier. That's always the case with these things, and it's not for us to judge what others were going through.

I'm sorry it was difficult for you, OP, and hope things are better now.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It wasn't that bad because I didn't make it that bad for myself. I didn't virtue signal about "staying indoors" or wearing masks alone in the woods. The biggest change is that I started working from home, and still work from home. And I got a few jabs in my arm.
Nobody I knew died from covid that wasn't already dying of something else. The people I knew that got Covid never got all that sick. I never got covid. The worst thing was during 2020 and some of 2021 it was frustrating when in-person events were canceled which honestly really didn't need to be. I definitely think people in Blue states overreacted and that's why there is such a strong Red tide among typically Blue demographics. I don't think there was a grand government control conspiracy, I think governments just didn't want to admit that they had no clue what they were doing and just wanted to look like they were doing something.
As soon as I got my first vaccine in May 2021, I:
Resumed any and all social activities
Resumed travel, parties, events, dining, you name it
Never wore a mask unless it was absolutely mandatory
Did. Not. Care. about case rates or numbers.
Basically, as soon as I got that vaccine, I lived like it was 2019 again and never looked back. I feel negative shame about this.


This post is one big virtue signaling LOL.
Anonymous
Telling people to STFU with regards to trauma (OP had PPD, a newborn, and two kids; other people in the thread talk about suicide and other damage, etc) reflects poorly on the person saying it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Look around. We all survived but we didn't make it through unscathed. There are so many ways to see how people were psychologically scarred by the pandemic. People are recovering now, or learning to live with the scars. But they're there.


This. It kicked off major mental health issues in DH that turned out to be related to childhood trauma and neglect. He's been in therapy for it for the last two years now and is just beginning to heal from it. We've been married for over 25 yrs and I had no idea how horrific his childhood was.....
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Recent death in the family?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Beaten by your spouse?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Suffer a racist attack?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING ABOUT EVERYTHING BECAUSE BABIES ARE DYING SOMEWHERE.


Are you in a war zone? Didn't think so. STFU
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Recent death in the family?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Beaten by your spouse?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

Suffer a racist attack?
PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES HAVE IT WORSE.

QUIT YOUR COMPLAINING ABOUT EVERYTHING BECAUSE BABIES ARE DYING SOMEWHERE.


Are you in a war zone? Didn't think so. STFU


I believe that was sarcasm.
Anonymous
I hear you, OP. On the hard days today, it sometimes feels strange to reflect on that time.
I also had a newborn (hello fellow March 2020 parents!) and a 3 year old at home with a husband who started working from home and gave up paternity leave since there was a lot of volatility in his industry. I was miserable with postpartum rage, a 3 year old who struggled with the new family life and loss of his daycare structure and a job I was worried about losing if I didn't stay responsive, even on leave. I felt very sorry for myself and the big plans I had for my last maternity leave. It sucked.

But for what its worth, the more time passes and the more I think about it, I had it better than most. I didn't have to deal with online schooling and young kids or teenagers developing anxiety and depression. I had kids that napped for hours during the day so I could take a break. I had family that was comfortable with visiting as things started opening up. I had a small yard and spent a lot of time outdoors.

I survived, but I regret my behavior during those months and would give anything to have that time back.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I hear you, OP. On the hard days today, it sometimes feels strange to reflect on that time.
I also had a newborn (hello fellow March 2020 parents!) and a 3 year old at home with a husband who started working from home and gave up paternity leave since there was a lot of volatility in his industry. I was miserable with postpartum rage, a 3 year old who struggled with the new family life and loss of his daycare structure and a job I was worried about losing if I didn't stay responsive, even on leave. I felt very sorry for myself and the big plans I had for my last maternity leave. It sucked.

But for what its worth, the more time passes and the more I think about it, I had it better than most. I didn't have to deal with online schooling and young kids or teenagers developing anxiety and depression. I had kids that napped for hours during the day so I could take a break. I had family that was comfortable with visiting as things started opening up. I had a small yard and spent a lot of time outdoors.

I survived, but I regret my behavior during those months and would give anything to have that time back.


This is OP - I feel the last sentence so much. I screamed at my 3 and 5 year old so many times I couldn't even count during those first few months. I still feel horrible about it. I was just sooooo tired and so depressed. They were needy and lonely, missing their friends, structure and we had to add in a new sibling to the mix. I know there were people who had it way worse than me but at the time it felt like a black hole was swallowing me up and I couldn't get out of my own way. Lack of sleep and stress that everyone was going to die (that is what they made it sound like in the beginning) really messed me up. My first two kids were such good sleeper that having my 3rd be the worst sleeper for 5 months straight was too much for me.
Anonymous
It was a terrible, scary time and NO ONE could provide reassurance. I shudder to remember it, and am actually offended at how many people say to just get over it.

We should try to learn from our experience, not minimize it.
Anonymous
Yeah it wasn't pleasant for me either - my father went to the hospital in March 2020 and then to rehab and we weren't allowed in to see him. He had dementia so he didn't understand why he was all alone. He died in May 2020 and we literally only got to see him on his death bed. I can barely think about it sometimes.
Anonymous
Are you in therapy? I had bad PPD and my memory and thoughts surrounding DS' first year were pretty miserable until I got therapy. (this wasn't during Covid).

I was a Covid nurse. I've legitimately blocked out some memories because it got so bad. What helped me was to concentrate on the positives. It reaffirmed what a great guy DH is and how strong our marriage is. I gained a lot of confidence as a nurse. Etc etc. It isn't so much about "getting over it" as it is about not letting those memories consume you. It is what it is. What happened isn't going to change and it won't do you good to concentrate on all you regret
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:It was a terrible, scary time and NO ONE could provide reassurance. I shudder to remember it, and am actually offended at how many people say to just get over it.

We should try to learn from our experience, not minimize it.


I find it amazing that at the same time everyone was stating that we needed to protect each other, there was this constant refrain that no one should express any mental health struggles associated with the pandemic. Worried you might die? Struggling having little kids while working at home? Lonely and depressed? You better shut up because PEOPLE IN WAR ZONES. It was the opposite of trying to help each other.
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