Husband wants to spend the entire new years weekend with his mom and dad

[Anonymous]

Is this the Alaskan cruise OP?

[Anonymous]

How long have you been married, OP?

Not sure I'd have kids with this guy. Was he like this when you were dating?

It's not about his plans for you, to me, it's that he'd rather spend another holiday weekend with them than with his wife romantically or with wife and friends. And it's so knee jerk he did not think to ask you and is DARVOing when you object.

Having kids with a man like this will be a nightmare, esp with ILs so close by.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t reward bad behavior. I would stay home. Husband can go have a sleepover with mommy and daddy. Do not engage in the fight. Leave the room when he brings it up.

OP here. He says that he and his mom discussed this in front of me at Christmas and it’s on me because I did not say anything! Well, yes HE said we will come stay over next weekend without talking to me!! I don’t want to create a scene in front of his family so I ignored it. And when I brought it up today, since he told me to pack my overnight bags, he flipped out and locked himself in his office. He says I keep him from his parents and he will make a decision to go do what he wants.

Erm his parents live 20 mins away! I have never said he can’t spend time with them!

This is so not believable. Sorry.

Agree. Troll coming back to add dramatic detail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been married, OP?

Not sure I'd have kids with this guy. Was he like this when you were dating?

It's not about his plans for you, to me, it's that he'd rather spend another holiday weekend with them than with his wife romantically or with wife and friends. And it's so knee jerk he did not think to ask you and is DARVOing when you object.

Having kids with a man like this will be a nightmare, esp with ILs so close by.

Op here. Almost 9 years. I am so sad too that he still sees his mom and dad as his family and not me. And it never occurred to him to have a quiet romantic evening with his wife.

I’m going to say he is free to spend the weekend with his parents and use this time for self-love and reflect on whether I want to be on this union.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How long have you been married, OP?

Not sure I'd have kids with this guy. Was he like this when you were dating?

It's not about his plans for you, to me, it's that he'd rather spend another holiday weekend with them than with his wife romantically or with wife and friends. And it's so knee jerk he did not think to ask you and is DARVOing when you object.

Having kids with a man like this will be a nightmare, esp with ILs so close by.

Op here. Almost 9 years. I am so sad too that he still sees his mom and dad as his family and not me. And it never occurred to him to have a quiet romantic evening with his wife.

I’m going to say he is free to spend the weekend with his parents and use this time for self-love and reflect on whether I want to be on this union.

You've been married 9 years and have no kids. Isn't almost every night a quiet romantic evening? He's probably bored out of his mind at this point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

32 is not that young, and certainly far older than the bar crowd on NYE>

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

I strongly suspect it’s more about not wanting to disappoint overbearing mommy and daddy. That said, I’d be seriously thinking of divorcing a man so enmeshed with mommy and daddy, who doesn’t check with me before making plans with them, who is afraid to tell them no after all, and who locks himself in an office over any of this. I’d be done with him. Cut and run while you can still have fun with someone else, and kids if you want them, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

32 is not that young, and certainly far older than the bar crowd on NYE>

Who said anything about a bar? Keep reaching.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

I strongly suspect it’s more about not wanting to disappoint overbearing mommy and daddy. That said, I’d be seriously thinking of divorcing a man so enmeshed with mommy and daddy, who doesn’t check with me before making plans with them, who is afraid to tell them no after all, and who locks himself in an office over any of this. I’d be done with him. Cut and run while you can still have fun with someone else, and kids if you want them, OP.

This is probably all part of the husband's plan to make it seem like OPs idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

I strongly suspect it’s more about not wanting to disappoint overbearing mommy and daddy. That said, I’d be seriously thinking of divorcing a man so enmeshed with mommy and daddy, who doesn’t check with me before making plans with them, who is afraid to tell them no after all, and who locks himself in an office over any of this. I’d be done with him. Cut and run while you can still have fun with someone else, and kids if you want them, OP.

This is such a weird mindset. People hang out with their extended family and/or people of different age groups on NYE. It's very common

[Anonymous]

[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

I strongly suspect it’s more about not wanting to disappoint overbearing mommy and daddy. That said, I’d be seriously thinking of divorcing a man so enmeshed with mommy and daddy, who doesn’t check with me before making plans with them, who is afraid to tell them no after all, and who locks himself in an office over any of this. I’d be done with him. Cut and run while you can still have fun with someone else, and kids if you want them, OP.

This is such a weird mindset. People hang out with their extended family and/or people of different age groups on NYE. It's very common

If both spouses want to, great. If only one does, fine. If one doesn’t and isn’t going to go, and the other one LOCKS HIMSELF IN HIS OFFICE over it, now we’ve got a problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More context is needed. How far away are ILs? Do you have small kids? Did you see them at Christmas? Why does DH want to go for the long weekend?

No kids. In our thirties. In laws are 20 mins away. He promised his parents at Christmas that we will be spending the New Years weekend with them, in front of me, without prior consultation with me. I didn’t say anything and thought we could discuss in private afterwards. When I did say no, he is flipping out about how he doesn’t want to break their hearts.

You go and then ask for a trip for just the two of you for Valentine's Day, etc. NBD. Stop looking for a fight.

Um, no. NYE for a child-free couple should be champagne, caviar and sex, not dominoes with old people.

You are making a lot of assumptions about the plans for both days. OP is looking for a fight - not a good way to start off the year.

OP is looking to relax after already seeing family for the holidays. It doesn’t matter if her plans are champagne or a face mask and bed by 10, it’s HER time and she doesn’t want to spend it with them. Get over it, Gladys!

Maybe DH is BORED and wants to be around other people...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[twitter]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You sound like a child, OP. Never have children, for our sake.

Um hanging out with old people isn’t fun on NYE. Sorry you are sensitive about being 50.

I truly hope you are a teenage troll.

I truly hope you can open your mind enough to imagine that most normal adults would rather spend a romantic or relaxing New Year’s Eve with their spouse, or their spouse and friends, vs. hanging around with the parents they just saw during the holidays. If you can’t figure out why young, no-kid adults would rather be with their spouse or their peers on NYE vs. their parents, then I strongly suspect you are 50+ and are warming up to be That MIL.

Well, except OPs husband. He doesn't want to be with his spouse.

I strongly suspect it’s more about not wanting to disappoint overbearing mommy and daddy. That said, I’d be seriously thinking of divorcing a man so enmeshed with mommy and daddy, who doesn’t check with me before making plans with them, who is afraid to tell them no after all, and who locks himself in an office over any of this. I’d be done with him. Cut and run while you can still have fun with someone else, and kids if you want them, OP.

This is such a weird mindset. People hang out with their extended family and/or people of different age groups on NYE. It's very common

If both spouses want to, great. If only one does, fine. If one doesn’t and isn’t going to go, and the other one LOCKS HIMSELF IN HIS OFFICE over it, now we’ve got a problem.

Now we have a problem? These things don't happen out of the blue. This marriage has probably been on the rocks for some time.