Jealousy among siblings and spouses

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our income is more than three times yours and I don't wear designer stuff because ... I don't want to. I think it's gaudy to wear tons of jewelry and/or recognizable brands.

Okay humblebragger. Let’s take away 2/3 of your income and see how you feel then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our income is more than three times yours and I don't wear designer stuff because ... I don't want to. I think it's gaudy to wear tons of jewelry and/or recognizable brands.

+1
We are also VHNW and I wear simple good quality clothing and jewelry - preferring no labels or recognizable anything.

FFS WE ALL KNOW you are speaking in not very discreet code for “oh I’m so rich I don’t show it” — this is just a different form of bragging. We are not stupid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are the flip of you. I’m the SAHM. DH earns 2-3m and I am not into jewelry. I don’t notice or care what jewelry people are wearing because that is not what I am into. I do have a lot of designer bags but I have gotten used to just going places with only my phone, especially if I’m just going to someone’s house.

I think this is a you problem. Many of my friends work while I don’t. I don’t really think about money and don’t spend more or less than I was working.

I love how all the VHNW people come here to say how they don’t think about money. Not thinking about money is there hallmark of money. Your comments are therefore pointless although certainly self-serving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At 300K you can afford a Goyard bag and a piece or two of Cartier jewelry. Why don’t you buy some?

What I mean is if it would make you happy to have things that cost $5,000 you can afford to buy them.

I think the issue is that this is nearly their entire HHI. If she had a spouse making even $200K, sure.

[Anonymous]

If you’re not enough without the designer stuff, you won’t be enough with the designer stuff.

[Anonymous]

DH and I do not make nearly as much as his brother + wife (BIL), I'd estimate they make 2x what we make. They have a much bigger house, in a much nicer neighborhood, always drive fancy cars (Gwagon, SLR) and trade them out every few years.
During covid, BIL asked DH to attend an informal meeting with a financial advisor (i think it was BIL friend) and do a check in. Turns out that they have almost no savings! SIL spends so much $ (tbf she prob makes most of it too) that BIL feels like he has to spend $ otherwise he doesnt get any. So they are both just spending spending spending and burning through cash. She also spends a ton supporting her parents, so BIL also buys random sht for his parents, like randomly buying them a new garage door. Their old one was fine, and they barely drive the car in the garage. Or a water softening system that they literally dont know how to use and dont know if its working lol. It's keeping up with the jones', but its his own wife hes trying to keep up with!

Anyways. Just to say, you have no idea whats happening in other peoples homes. Be happy with what you have and how you are doing - which is great! Congrats on your new promotion!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP how did you recognize those brands? We have high HHI and I wouldn’t know them or particularly care. House yes. Jewelry no.

I’m not a handbag person either, but all the women in my family fawn over them. It’s always a conversation at get togethers. Everyone is oohing and ahhing over each other’s handbags and giving tips on how to get the VIP ones. I smile politely and try to follow along but eventually I find scamper off to find the wine. Boring!

[Anonymous]

OP, make a list of a few items that you really like and buy one of those items. done!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you’re not enough without the designer stuff, you won’t be enough with the designer stuff.

x1000000

THIS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP how did you recognize those brands? We have high HHI and I wouldn’t know them or particularly care. House yes. Jewelry no.

I’m not a handbag person either, but all the women in my family fawn over them. It’s always a conversation at get togethers. Everyone is oohing and ahhing over each other’s handbags and giving tips on how to get the VIP ones. I smile politely and try to follow along but eventually I find scamper off to find the wine. Boring!

+1

I would be completely bored, and wonder how I ended up in such a vapid, shallow family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DH and I do not make nearly as much as his brother + wife (BIL), I'd estimate they make 2x what we make. They have a much bigger house, in a much nicer neighborhood, always drive fancy cars (Gwagon, SLR) and trade them out every few years.
During covid, BIL asked DH to attend an informal meeting with a financial advisor (i think it was BIL friend) and do a check in. Turns out that they have almost no savings! SIL spends so much $ (tbf she prob makes most of it too) that BIL feels like he has to spend $ otherwise he doesnt get any. So they are both just spending spending spending and burning through cash. She also spends a ton supporting her parents, so BIL also buys random sht for his parents, like randomly buying them a new garage door. Their old one was fine, and they barely drive the car in the garage. Or a water softening system that they literally dont know how to use and dont know if its working lol. It's keeping up with the jones', but its his own wife hes trying to keep up with!

Anyways. Just to say, you have no idea whats happening in other peoples homes. Be happy with what you have and how you are doing - which is great! Congrats on your new promotion!

This sounds like an insane and terrible way to live, honestly. Be glad you are not them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our income is more than three times yours and I don't wear designer stuff because ... I don't want to. I think it's gaudy to wear tons of jewelry and/or recognizable brands.

+1
We are also VHNW and I wear simple good quality clothing and jewelry - preferring no labels or recognizable anything.

FFS WE ALL KNOW you are speaking in not very discreet code for “oh I’m so rich I don’t show it” — this is just a different form of bragging. We are not stupid.

NP/Dp
People who are not into junk labels exist in all classes.

[Anonymous]

Our HHI is $800k and I’ve never bought a designer bag. I’m extremely happy. You’re chasing the wrong things, OP.

[Anonymous]

People who spend huge amounts on designer handbags are stupid skanks even if they are wealthy stupid skanks. What a moronic sort of thing to waste their money on.

People who are envious of stupid skanks are even dumber. How TF could you be earning $300k OP? Are you a university president by chance?

[Anonymous]

O/T - I’m sincerely curious what all these rich people “not into designer bags” use for a handbag? I am frugal and not into labels (I’m also not rich) but I still like my bag to be cute and functional. What’s your go to?