Drastic change in rigor/prestige/whatever from high school to college

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

If this is the sum total of your worries about your smart, privileged, and high-achieving kid, count your blessings. Seriously. I don’t believe in sin but it is really a lack of character you are showing. Your mental energy could be better spent on a million other problems. Just do a Sudoku when ever this thought occurs to you.

Lack of character? It was just a question on how to interact with others in a very specific set of circumstances - something I'm not great at. If you want to judge me, you can judge me for not wanting him to enlist. Happy now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can’t live your life worrying about what other people think.

Disagree. That's a great way to never get married, make friends, be offered a job...

Perseverating on how you are embarrassed by your child’s college choice (because that is what this is about) is not the road to happiness and job satisfaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

You do you OP. That is a little bit of an unusual choice but you seem to have some very specific parameters so if you and your child have considered the options and concluded this makes sense it’s not really anyone else’s business.

I’m this PP and I think prestige is irrelevant. My concern about this decision would be twofold: 1) will he be happy at ODU? I’m sure there are bright kids there but the academic rigor probably isn’t going to be what he would typically be used to, or at least the academic caliber of a lot of the students. 2) what if NROTC isn’t what he expected? I guess he could always transfer but the job opportunities out of ODU probably are lesser than many other schools he could attend if he doesn’t end up as a naval officer.

But again, if you are all sure, it’s no one’s business

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

If this is the sum total of your worries about your smart, privileged, and high-achieving kid, count your blessings. Seriously. I don’t believe in sin but it is really a lack of character you are showing. Your mental energy could be better spent on a million other problems. Just do a Sudoku when ever this thought occurs to you.

Lack of character? It was just a question on how to interact with others in a very specific set of circumstances - something I'm not great at. If you want to judge me, you can judge me for not wanting him to enlist. Happy now?

You’re only asking this question because you are embarrassed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

If this is the sum total of your worries about your smart, privileged, and high-achieving kid, count your blessings. Seriously. I don’t believe in sin but it is really a lack of character you are showing. Your mental energy could be better spent on a million other problems. Just do a Sudoku when ever this thought occurs to you.

Lack of character? It was just a question on how to interact with others in a very specific set of circumstances - something I'm not great at. If you want to judge me, you can judge me for not wanting him to enlist. Happy now?

You’re only asking this question because you are embarrassed.

Wrong. Just...absolutely wrong. I'm thrilled he's chosen ROTC.

[Anonymous]

My daughter received early acceptance to Northwestern last year. She only told a couple of close friends when she was notified of her acceptance and that was it. Over the course of her senior year, she knew where he friends were going to end up. However, it wasn't until they published the school newspaper at the end of the year did she have a clue what school most of her fellow classmates would attend. She and her friends were not obsessed about college admission. Most kids are really indifferent to what their classmates are doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

You do you OP. That is a little bit of an unusual choice but you seem to have some very specific parameters so if you and your child have considered the options and concluded this makes sense it’s not really anyone else’s business.

I’m this PP and I think prestige is irrelevant. My concern about this decision would be twofold: 1) will he be happy at ODU? I’m sure there are bright kids there but the academic rigor probably isn’t going to be what he would typically be used to, or at least the academic caliber of a lot of the students. 2) what if NROTC isn’t what he expected? I guess he could always transfer but the job opportunities out of ODU probably are lesser than many other schools he could attend if he doesn’t end up as a naval officer.

But again, if you are all sure, it’s no one’s business

That's...all fair, and things we hadn't thought of. I suspect an academic break would be welcome, but he won't tolerate classmates who don't take things seriously, no. We'd assumed ROTC would take care of a bit of that problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

If this is the sum total of your worries about your smart, privileged, and high-achieving kid, count your blessings. Seriously. I don’t believe in sin but it is really a lack of character you are showing. Your mental energy could be better spent on a million other problems. Just do a Sudoku when ever this thought occurs to you.

Lack of character? It was just a question on how to interact with others in a very specific set of circumstances - something I'm not great at. If you want to judge me, you can judge me for not wanting him to enlist. Happy now?

You’re only asking this question because you are embarrassed.

Wrong. Just...absolutely wrong. I'm thrilled he's chosen ROTC.

just say that then.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

MIT or BU? Tulane?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

MIT or BU? Tulane?

If a student doesn't get accepted to the USNA, those are unlikely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

You do you OP. That is a little bit of an unusual choice but you seem to have some very specific parameters so if you and your child have considered the options and concluded this makes sense it’s not really anyone else’s business.

I’m this PP and I think prestige is irrelevant. My concern about this decision would be twofold: 1) will he be happy at ODU? I’m sure there are bright kids there but the academic rigor probably isn’t going to be what he would typically be used to, or at least the academic caliber of a lot of the students. 2) what if NROTC isn’t what he expected? I guess he could always transfer but the job opportunities out of ODU probably are lesser than many other schools he could attend if he doesn’t end up as a naval officer.

But again, if you are all sure, it’s no one’s business

NP. I live right near ODU, fwiw. I think he might find higher caliber students in areas directly tied to it being a coastal school/port city. Oceanography, coastal resilience, supply chain management, things of that nature. Some kids do actually come here intentionally.

That said, is he into boating or sailing, or does he want to be on the coast because he thinks he’ll hang out at the beach or something? (The beach is a bit of a drive.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

They will probably wonder what’s up but not ask you about it unless they are a close friend

[Anonymous]

OP, I assume you’ve looked through https://www.netc.navy.mil/Commands/Naval-Service-Training-Command/NROTC/Navy-ROTC-Schools/#div6. ?

Seems like there are options in Florida, California, etc (near coast and NROTC)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

You do you OP. That is a little bit of an unusual choice but you seem to have some very specific parameters so if you and your child have considered the options and concluded this makes sense it’s not really anyone else’s business.

I’m this PP and I think prestige is irrelevant. My concern about this decision would be twofold: 1) will he be happy at ODU? I’m sure there are bright kids there but the academic rigor probably isn’t going to be what he would typically be used to, or at least the academic caliber of a lot of the students. 2) what if NROTC isn’t what he expected? I guess he could always transfer but the job opportunities out of ODU probably are lesser than many other schools he could attend if he doesn’t end up as a naval officer.

But again, if you are all sure, it’s no one’s business

NP. I live right near ODU, fwiw. I think he might find higher caliber students in areas directly tied to it being a coastal school/port city. Oceanography, coastal resilience, supply chain management, things of that nature. Some kids do actually come here intentionally.

That said, is he into boating or sailing, or does he want to be on the coast because he thinks he’ll hang out at the beach or something? (The beach is a bit of a drive.)

He loves to sail, which is a huge reason for the choice. Thinking about aero or civil engineering (I know, not similar).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

You do you OP. That is a little bit of an unusual choice but you seem to have some very specific parameters so if you and your child have considered the options and concluded this makes sense it’s not really anyone else’s business.

I’m this PP and I think prestige is irrelevant. My concern about this decision would be twofold: 1) will he be happy at ODU? I’m sure there are bright kids there but the academic rigor probably isn’t going to be what he would typically be used to, or at least the academic caliber of a lot of the students. 2) what if NROTC isn’t what he expected? I guess he could always transfer but the job opportunities out of ODU probably are lesser than many other schools he could attend if he doesn’t end up as a naval officer.

But again, if you are all sure, it’s no one’s business

NP. I live right near ODU, fwiw. I think he might find higher caliber students in areas directly tied to it being a coastal school/port city. Oceanography, coastal resilience, supply chain management, things of that nature. Some kids do actually come here intentionally.

That said, is he into boating or sailing, or does he want to be on the coast because he thinks he’ll hang out at the beach or something? (The beach is a bit of a drive.)

He loves to sail, which is a huge reason for the choice. Thinking about aero or civil engineering (I know, not similar).

Oh, he’ll be fine! He might really enjoy it.