Drastic change in rigor/prestige/whatever from high school to college

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mean like Sidwell to say Temple (totally random choice of a example)?

no, I don't think classmates comment on this. they are generally very supportive and excited for everyone. Probably grandparents and aunts may, depending on their own college roots. (I.e. those who don't know anything about the current college landscape).

It may be random, but oddly enough 2 Sidwell kids in the 2023 class did indicate they were going to attend Temple.

huh. My choice of example schools was completely random.
I don't have a kid at Sidwell and don't know anything about their 2023 class; I'm sure i could have struck on a real-life combo regardless of which 2 schools I chose.

Are they sports kids? Only athletes know where they are going now.

Class of 2023 are currently freshman in college.

[Anonymous]

OP is right to be concerned about how this decision will be viewed at her son’s school. After all, they have been living in an environment where people are very attached to the prestige/cachet/whatever of their Big X school and look down upon students at other schools they consider inferior. It’s part of the culture and not something OP has had to deal with from the other side of the equation.

Whatever choice the student makes, he will only have to deal with the snobs for a few months until he is off following his dream with his parents support. GL to him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is right to be concerned about how this decision will be viewed at her son’s school. After all, they have been living in an environment where people are very attached to the prestige/cachet/whatever of their Big X school and look down upon students at other schools they consider inferior. It’s part of the culture and not something OP has had to deal with from the other side of the equation.

Whatever choice the student makes, he will only have to deal with the snobs for a few months until he is off following his dream with his parents support. GL to him.

This is a good reminder that there is life after high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

oh good luck to him! I would think (hope) that he'll get in to the Academy.

Kids hear you loud and clear when you tell them that their school choice, career path, and lifestyle are embarrassing and they are above the lowly other people doing those things right now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My athlete son got into a school people thought was above his ability and they made comments.

OTOH, my other son went to an SEC school and the parents I met at my "athlete" son's school were super snobby about the SEC school choice, though they tried really hard to act like they were not.

Also, my son did not go to Tennessee and it was on his list and people acted like I had lost my mind.

Isn't it the craziest thing when others, including family, feel so very strong about where your kid goes to college? So rude!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

[Anonymous]

I have a kid from a respected public HS who chose a college below their academic qualifications in order to play their sport. They got money, honors college and is doing great. Yes, there were a few comments but mostly talk about recruiting. 😉

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

oh good luck to him! I would think (hope) that he'll get in to the Academy.

Going to be a challenge if parent not in service- preferably an E-6 to E-9. Academy is really for connected military families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is going to sound horrible, but I only have the best of intentions for asking, so here we go: if your child ended up at a school that was not proportionate to their ability and/or academic history, did anyone care or comment on it, especially their classmates?

If I understand your post, your child's abilities and academic experience are superior to his or her college destination ?

Comments from classmates & family friends might be unpleasant, but should not be of any concern as this is a temporary topic.

A reasonable comment from a close friend might be to ask why your child selected this particular school.

We obviously don't know for sure yet, but his safety frontrunner isn't well thought of. He could do "better", but he's choosing it for a specific reason, which we're ok with...just wondering if others will make comments. To be prepared.

(I am the poster to whom you responded. Thank you.)

My guess is that your son/daughter attends a rigorous elite private school and is considering a generous scholarship offer to a Southern flagship such as the University of Alabama or Ole Miss. Wants to enjoy his/her college experience.

If correct, attending a Southern flagship Honors College is nothing to be shy about--especially if planning to attend law school or some other type of expensive graduate program.

If your concern is to be prepared about how to handle inappropriate or derogatory comments about your child's school selection, then either state the reason behind the choice or dismiss the negative comment with a short, polite comment such as he/she wants to enjoy his or her college years.

Are you comfortable sharing why your overqualified student wants to attend this school ?

Private school senior, 1500+ SAT, top 3 in class so far, hoping for a Naval Academy slot but is looking forward to ODU as where they'll probably end up. Yes, we've considered schools with selectivity in between, but NROTC availability plus being on the coast is a draw we can't really find elsewhere. The decisions makes sense to us, but it's hard to explain why we're not considering more elite flagship.

oh good luck to him! I would think (hope) that he'll get in to the Academy.

Going to be a challenge if parent not in service- preferably an E-6 to E-9. Academy is really for connected military families.

Wait, what? We're a military family, but I had no idea children of senior enlisted are preferred. Do you have a source for that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP why do you care if anyone comments? Caring about uninformed comments should be way down on your list of concerns.

I want to be prepared.

prepared for what exactly? stop caring. this is your child’s decision and you are fixated.

[Anonymous]

Can’t live your life worrying about what other people think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can’t live your life worrying about what other people think.

Disagree. That's a great way to never get married, make friends, be offered a job...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a bit surprised as your son's academic/intellectual abilities are outstanding and ODU is full of less motivated and less talented students.

Too bad College of Charleston doesn't offer NROTC.

Right. That's exactly the issue. And we're open to other options! Just haven't found the perfect fit, and we're running out of time.

Wow. Do you hear yourself? You are agreeing with that poster and you both are saying exactly what you are afraid people will say. Are you actually supporting your son’s decision? Or are you secretly one of those people who will look down on his choice because it sure sounds like it.

Nope, totally support him (trust me, there are career decisions I would not support). But because I recognize it's an unexpected decision, I just don't know how to deal with others who will vocally NOT support him, whether they're his classmates or our friends/family.

If this is the sum total of your worries about your smart, privileged, and high-achieving kid, count your blessings. Seriously. I don’t believe in sin but it is really a lack of character you are showing. Your mental energy could be better spent on a million other problems. Just do a Sudoku when ever this thought occurs to you.