Do your parents/in laws know how much money you make?

[Anonymous]

No idea at this point. I work in tech and my spouse works in sales. Our income is actually really variable but much, much higher than you'd guess in a good year.

[Anonymous]

My parents are now deceased. My mom probably had no real idea, but my dad had a sense and didn't refuse money when offered. He would have done so if he thought there was any possible way I was shortchanging my family.

ILs have a sense, partially because of the relatives told them. MiL doesn't necessarily want out our money now, but wants to be taken care of. They have far far far more than my parents ever did, but also spend far far far more.

[Anonymous]

No.

My mother knew what I had in my 401k, because she cared deeply about investing, taught me a lot about it, and revelled in my successes. But salary - no, at least not once I got out of my 20's.

Inlaws or anyone else - nope. However, my salary is actually disclosed in federal tax forms (I work for a nonprofit) so absolutely anyone could know my salary if they wanted to.

[Anonymous]

My parents know and my kids know. My brother also knows because he's a financial planner, and I sometimes ask him advice.

[Anonymous]

I’m so surprised by the all the “no” answers! All of our immediate family (parents and siblings) know, and we know what they make. It generally comes up in sharing financial planning advice. I guess it never occurred to me that family would ask for money. We got lucky that everyone in our family had done pretty well for themselves, so I can’t imagine anyone asking us for monetary help.

[Anonymous]

My mother has always judged my husband as he was a building engineer when we met and advanced to a chief building engineer earning 6 figure's plus bonus, more than I with two bachelors and two masters degrees.

My parents have never liked my husband ‘cause he was a blue collar worker, yet he made an excellent salary, has always provided for me, and we’ve travelled as time and money permitted. I moved into his home as it was larger than mine. My parents didn’t attend our wedding in protest of my taking my husband’s side. I told them it was my decision and I was living with it. They refuse to visit us, yet they fail to realize that I’m happier now than I’ve ever been. Of all my siblings, I’m the most successful and living a very comfortable life.

I’d never tell them of my husband’s net worth nor what he stands to inherit. My in laws treat me just like one of their family.

[Anonymous]

My parents and in laws knew how much my husband made because he ran a public company and that info is made public. I’m clueless as to how much my own kids make but I know they are doing very well. We always lived well below our means so when our kids still lived at home I’m sure they had no clue as to what we made.

[Anonymous]

No.

Like many PP’s we have a nice yet modestly sized house, but lots of other factors that stick out as HHI. I’m sure they’ve all imagined their own number but I’m not telling and they’re not asking.

[Anonymous]

No. My MIL looks down on our home and brags about how successful her friends’ kids are!

[Anonymous]

My in-laws don’t know how much we make, but they think they do. They think we make more than we do and accuse us of being cheap when really we are just sticking with our budget.

[Anonymous]

No, unless they have searched for it - it’s public information.

We have modest home & cars & desires, but lots of cash flow and savings. I think our parents have some idea that we are wealthy (and they have no idea about DCUM wealthy, which we are not)

[Anonymous]

One of us has a publicly listed salary and the other one is in a type of industry where it's relatively easy to come up with a ballpark range for salary, so I think if they really cared, they can figure it out.

DH did have a discussion with FIL (who is pretty good about money) about retirement savings, so they have a sense of our overall financial standing.

MIL is kind of funny about money even though they are well off. So we don't talk about it with her. She would be making all kinds of uncomfortable comments.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not.

They know that we are financially stable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m so surprised by the all the “no” answers! All of our immediate family (parents and siblings) know, and we know what they make. It generally comes up in sharing financial planning advice. I guess it never occurred to me that family would ask for money. We got lucky that everyone in our family had done pretty well for themselves, so I can’t imagine anyone asking us for monetary help.

I’m surprised by all the “yes” answers!
I cannot imagine discussing finances with my family and “sharing financial planning advice”. I wonder if this is an “old money” thing, to not talk about it. We certainly don’t.

[Anonymous]

No. I wouldn't hide it from my parents, but we've never really talked about money. I don't know what they ever made either - I can make some guesses, as I'm sure they can about me, but nothing for certain. My mom is a little more open now about her retirement fund situation, I think mainly to reassure me that I don't need to plan for supporting her.