Style choices that age women in their 40s

[Anonymous]

Too many women keep their long hair and don't realize how it drags them down. I'm sure many of you keep your hair styled and cut. But this is DCUM-world. And too many women don't take of their long hair. Too many ponytails.

And dying hair - same as above. Too many women choose the wrong shading or don't touch up. My eyes are immediately drawn to the difference from the natural gray hairline to the colored part.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t realize how much disdain there is for capris! What are options when it’s super super hot out and jeans are not comfortable, and skirts are not practical (eg sitting on a picnic blanket with little kids)?

Midi skirts and dresses

Workout dresses/skirts with bike shorts underneath.

Lightweight pants (linen, technical knits)

Shorts (longer inseams are in right now so it’s easy to find comfortable shorts that are easy to wear while sitting on the ground or playing with kids)

I don’t get the appeal of capris for this reason anyway? Is your calf really the hottest part of your body? For me it’s less about exposing more skin than about choosing the right fabrics and making sure nothing sits too close to my body. I’d take a pair of full length linen pants with a wider leg of fitted capri pants any day if the week.

Sorry haters, but capris and skinny jeans are here to stay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Too many women keep their long hair and don't realize how it drags them down. I'm sure many of you keep your hair styled and cut. But this is DCUM-world. And too many women don't take of their long hair. Too many ponytails.

And dying hair - same as above. Too many women choose the wrong shading or don't touch up. My eyes are immediately drawn to the difference from the natural gray hairline to the colored part.

Agree with the hair length. My mom kept super long hair and it looks awful

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t realize how much disdain there is for capris! What are options when it’s super super hot out and jeans are not comfortable, and skirts are not practical (eg sitting on a picnic blanket with little kids)?

Shorts.

I’ve hated capris for years but it feels so hard to find light weight pants that are full length. . I’m 5’8 and so many spring/summer pants are cropped to some degree these days. Now there are some casual ones with drawstring waists, but I prefer a more tailored look. Appreciate any suggestions .

https://www.loft.com/613548.html

https://www.loft.com/610928.html

Also, I think cropped to the ankle is fine. People are specifically talking about capri pants that are cropped to just below the knee. It cuts your legs in half, visually, and often has this very unflattering way of hugging the top of your calf. It’s a bad look on anyone, but fir some reason middle aged women wear them a lot and many of us associate it with middle aged frump.

But a pair of pants cropped to the ankle or even an inch or two above don’t bother me, especially in summer with a pair of cute sandals.

I will just point out with the two examples you linked - the sailor pants only work if you are skinny and fairly tall, unless they come in a petite version. The other pants are nice, but I'd never wear these in place of casual capris. Like I am not wearing these to a picnic or the 4th July parade.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know I will be argued with for this. But letting hair go completely grey is the most aging. Even heavy wrinkles aren’t as ageing.

I think it depends, and I also think this is one of those things that we've been societally conditioned to believe is a hallmark of aging (but only in women!), and aging is bad for women because, again, society tells us that it makes unattractive to men. And we are conditioned to believe our worth only exists in relation to the male gaze.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone here pointed out that after your 20s, larger breasts age you. It's hard to explain how, but when I tried on a shirt with a padded pushup bra and a regular light bra, the extra boob size definitely made me look older. It's subtle but there was a difference. So throw out the miracle bras or, if you're bustier, go for a smoothing sports bra style.

Large breasts aren't a style choice. Unless you are talking about implants. It's like saying, being under 5'6" ages you. Or blue eyes age you.

NP and I’m taking this personally! I’m 52, 5’5” 130 lbs. and a bra size of 33E. I’ve always had large breasts on a small frame, but post menopause I think my 10 pound weight gain is because my breasts went up 2 bands and 2 cup sizes.

Get professionally fitted bras. I have for years. No tunic tops - makes me look like I’m wearing a choir robe. My bra fitting store convinced me to give up on
a minimizer and opt for well fitting, supportive bras instead.

Correctly fitting bras and great posture help!

PP here and ITA! I am a similar size. The right bra size and a good bra is key.

Saying big breasts age you is just another slam on body type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Too many women keep their long hair and don't realize how it drags them down. I'm sure many of you keep your hair styled and cut. But this is DCUM-world. And too many women don't take of their long hair. Too many ponytails.

And dying hair - same as above. Too many women choose the wrong shading or don't touch up. My eyes are immediately drawn to the difference from the natural gray hairline to the colored part.

No, gravity exists in DCUM. I made a similar comment earlier this year and the reaction was - well, enjoy your mom Bob. (As though those are the only two options).

if your face and body are aging, then your hair likely is too, and you need to figure how to adjust.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will be argued with for this. But letting hair go completely grey is the most aging. Even heavy wrinkles aren’t as ageing.

I think it depends, and I also think this is one of those things that we've been societally conditioned to believe is a hallmark of aging (but only in women!), and aging is bad for women because, again, society tells us that it makes unattractive to men. And we are conditioned to believe our worth only exists in relation to the male gaze.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

+1. Also it’s an example of where we don’t realize what true aging looks like because women have been covering grey for so long.

I follow a lot of IG gray hair sites and I am struck by how early lots of people actually reach the tipping point to dye. I had no idea because everyone is dying.

[Anonymous]

What is wrong with tunics?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will be argued with for this. But letting hair go completely grey is the most aging. Even heavy wrinkles aren’t as ageing.

I think it depends, and I also think this is one of those things that we've been societally conditioned to believe is a hallmark of aging (but only in women!), and aging is bad for women because, again, society tells us that it makes unattractive to men. And we are conditioned to believe our worth only exists in relation to the male gaze.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

+1. Also it’s an example of where we don’t realize what true aging looks like because women have been covering grey for so long.

I follow a lot of IG gray hair sites and I am struck by how early lots of people actually reach the tipping point to dye. I had no idea because everyone is dying.

Lots of people dye by the time they are around 30. I worked in an office with a lot of (fashionable, attractive) 30 something women and most of them probably dyed their hair. They were super fastidious about it though (going regularly to the salon) so they never had roots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t realize how much disdain there is for capris! What are options when it’s super super hot out and jeans are not comfortable, and skirts are not practical (eg sitting on a picnic blanket with little kids)?

Shorts.

I’ve hated capris for years but it feels so hard to find light weight pants that are full length. . I’m 5’8 and so many spring/summer pants are cropped to some degree these days. Now there are some casual ones with drawstring waists, but I prefer a more tailored look. Appreciate any suggestions .

https://www.loft.com/613548.html

https://www.loft.com/610928.html

Also, I think cropped to the ankle is fine. People are specifically talking about capri pants that are cropped to just below the knee. It cuts your legs in half, visually, and often has this very unflattering way of hugging the top of your calf. It’s a bad look on anyone, but fir some reason middle aged women wear them a lot and many of us associate it with middle aged frump.

But a pair of pants cropped to the ankle or even an inch or two above don’t bother me, especially in summer with a pair of cute sandals.

I will just point out with the two examples you linked - the sailor pants only work if you are skinny and fairly tall, unless they come in a petite version. The other pants are nice, but I'd never wear these in place of casual capris. Like I am not wearing these to a picnic or the 4th July parade.

If you want to wear capris, wear capris. I'm not your personal shopper -- I posted a couple pairs of pants to demonstrate that yes, you can find linen or other lightweight pants that are comfortable and appropriate for summer, because the PP specifically asked for suggestions that didn't have a drawstring waist. I maintain that capris are unflattering on like 99% of women because of where they cut off your leg, and that most people will look better in either a longer pant or a pair of shorts, both of which are widely available in weights and cuts that appropriate for summer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t realize how much disdain there is for capris! What are options when it’s super super hot out and jeans are not comfortable, and skirts are not practical (eg sitting on a picnic blanket with little kids)?

Midi skirts and dresses

Workout dresses/skirts with bike shorts underneath.

Lightweight pants (linen, technical knits)

Shorts (longer inseams are in right now so it’s easy to find comfortable shorts that are easy to wear while sitting on the ground or playing with kids)

I don’t get the appeal of capris for this reason anyway? Is your calf really the hottest part of your body? For me it’s less about exposing more skin than about choosing the right fabrics and making sure nothing sits too close to my body. I’d take a pair of full length linen pants with a wider leg of fitted capri pants any day if the week.

Sorry haters, but capris and skinny jeans are here to stay.

You say this like we're trying to tell you they are extinct. Of course not -- I see them all the time. But they are less flattering than other options and are not stylish or, especially in the case of capri pants, fashionable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will be argued with for this. But letting hair go completely grey is the most aging. Even heavy wrinkles aren’t as ageing.

+100. I will never do this.

But I also think that dying hair brown is also aging when most of your hair is grey. And blond just looks like all your doing is trying to not be grey. I also think gray roots with any color hair is aging. The problem is dyed hair can look washed out/faded and dry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know I will be argued with for this. But letting hair go completely grey is the most aging. Even heavy wrinkles aren’t as ageing.

+100. I will never do this.

But I also think that dying hair brown is also aging when most of your hair is grey. And blond just looks like all your doing is trying to not be grey. I also think gray roots with any color hair is aging. The problem is dyed hair can look washed out/faded and dry.

This is why you go to a professional to dye your hair and you go frequently.

[Anonymous]

Moto jacket or cropped leather jacket