Are women's standards higher now or is it just a myth?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Hold on. So women, who only recently got the right to work and to exist independently outside of a man, picked up the skill of multi-tasking through osmosis while men's ability to cope and do the same fell in the gutter? And their increased ability to function took away mens' ability to function due to a limited supply? Sure Jan.

I think this is pretty insulting to every woman who lived before 1960. What do you think the avg woman's life was like before reliable birth control and a washing machine. Yes, I think women, on average, have always been better at multitasking then men, on avg.

There’s “multitasking” and then there is literally fighting their way into careers that were closed to women as recently as mothers and grandmothers day, and somehow that is the less challenging task than learning to fold laundry? I think you’re doing a disservice to every woman who became a pilot, a diplomat, a judge, a surgeon in the last 40 years…

The average woman today will never become a pilot, a diplomat, a judge or a surgeon. But now it's also a hell of a lot harder for her to become a mother and wife.

Nor will the “average” man.

But the woman will be expected to do a lot more at home than her below-average spouse will.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I'm a youngish woman. I hear lots of younger guys complaining that women's standards are higher now than in past generations, but how would they even know? They weren't dating 20+ years ago. Is there any truth to this or do they just have grass is greener syndrome?

Men don’t have standards because they’re used to others - mom, nanny, sitter, secretary, jr employees, wife, daughters - doing things for them. So they can focus on what they prefer to.

This. It’s this simple.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I'm a youngish woman. I hear lots of younger guys complaining that women's standards are higher now than in past generations, but how would they even know? They weren't dating 20+ years ago. Is there any truth to this or do they just have grass is greener syndrome?

Majority don’t pass a pretty basic level of standards for maintaining a home, communicating, or planning for others. Nothing crazy, just don’t or can’t do basic stuff.

+1. Many still try to just be a Paycheck Provider. That is the only “standard” their parents or society taught them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Hold on. So women, who only recently got the right to work and to exist independently outside of a man, picked up the skill of multi-tasking through osmosis while men's ability to cope and do the same fell in the gutter? And their increased ability to function took away mens' ability to function due to a limited supply? Sure Jan.

I think this is pretty insulting to every woman who lived before 1960. What do you think the avg woman's life was like before reliable birth control and a washing machine. Yes, I think women, on average, have always been better at multitasking then men, on avg.

There’s “multitasking” and then there is literally fighting their way into careers that were closed to women as recently as mothers and grandmothers day, and somehow that is the less challenging task than learning to fold laundry? I think you’re doing a disservice to every woman who became a pilot, a diplomat, a judge, a surgeon in the last 40 years…

I think you are missing the point. The multi-task comment is about women's evolutionary skillset at juggling multiple tasks of raising serial children while having to skin leather for garments, mind the food in the firepit, remembering to make sure there is enough water in the cistern, watch that her toddler doesn't wander too close to the peat bog... all the requirements of running stable home for her family group. It's not about a law degree vs. folding laundry, it's about the ability to juggle all the activities. The early women who were untalented at multi-tasking usually didn't survive and neither did their progeny. The survivors passed down their advantageous traits. This is Darwin's theory of evolution.
Men didn't have to tend to the homefront. The successful surviving hunter gathering man had mostly a single task which required laser focus, stalking the animals and bringing that food resource home. A male with strong physique could wrestle down that protein for his family. A weak male who couldn't focus and prioritize could not ensure his progeny would survive.

So this is the general explanation for how the different skills came about. Women frankly are more talented (X chromosome sperm are denser as it carries more info than the Y chromosome). Men have the other talents but unfortunately we don't expect them to hunt down wild boar anymore. Women can just as easily get some bacon from the deli aisle today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: I'm a youngish woman. I hear lots of younger guys complaining that women's standards are higher now than in past generations, but how would they even know? They weren't dating 20+ years ago. Is there any truth to this or do they just have grass is greener syndrome?

Majority don’t pass a pretty basic level of standards for maintaining a home, communicating, or planning for others. Nothing crazy, just don’t or can’t do basic stuff.

+1. Many still try to just be a Paycheck Provider. That is the only “standard” their parents or society taught them.

Most don’t even do this. Overwhelming majority of families with two adults have both adults working outside the home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

But if women's standards are higher, in theory, wouldn't that be incentive enough?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Hold on. So women, who only recently got the right to work and to exist independently outside of a man, picked up the skill of multi-tasking through osmosis while men's ability to cope and do the same fell in the gutter? And their increased ability to function took away mens' ability to function due to a limited supply? Sure Jan.

Usually the multi-tasking skill, or talent, is something one is born with. You either have it or you don't.
The common understanding is that women evolved this skill whereas men didn't have to. So the modern homo sapien male generally does not exhibit this ability.

In today's society, the man that does exhibit and exercise this talent is at a considerable advantage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

But if women's standards are higher, in theory, wouldn't that be incentive enough?

Duh, if they are getting free sex via grinder, find no pushback companionship from a dog and daily life is satisfying at this level, what incentive is there?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Matchmakers (women) are quitting because single women have become completely unreasonable with their wish lists and high standards. The men are dating younger or are dating foreign women.

So, yes.

+1

American women have a captive audience. The vast majority of men never seek out women from other countries and it's 100% their fault. The difference in quality is night and day. I've yet to find an American male expat who prefers American women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think women for the last 30 years have had higher standards. I will add a big "BUT" to this. Many do not have realistic expectations. You can't demand a 10 if you are not one yourself. The same goes for men.

I am middle aged and witnessed a lot of my peers pass on good guys because they did not believe they were up to their standards in regards to looks and income. Those people are still single and unhappy.

I am just saying, it is good to gave standards but be real about it.

My cousin has passed up nice, cute guys with good jobs because she has a height requirement of at least 6 feet, preferably taller. I think she’s maybe 5’8” so it isn’t like she’s super tall herself.

I snagged a great/hot 5'8" guy late in the game and I couldn't believe he was still single.

Thanks cousin and others like her!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

And what is the best version of manhood? As far as I can tell from this thread it's to be a good feminist. Do we raise our daughters with that sort of reverence and respect for the capabilities of men? My 8 year old son sees all of the girl power stuff my daughter has. There are no 'boy power' t-shirts and stickers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

And what is the best version of manhood? As far as I can tell from this thread it's to be a good feminist. Do we raise our daughters with that sort of reverence and respect for the capabilities of men? My 8 year old son sees all of the girl power stuff my daughter has. There are no 'boy power' t-shirts and stickers.

Yeah it’s so sad that there are so few examples of men in power for them to aspire to…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe having to excel in two spheres (work and home) is easier for women, on avg, and harder for men, on avg. Combine that with the fact that women, on average, don't withhold sex until marriage, you're going to see an increasing number of males not striving to be the best version of themselves.

If the past 50 years can be considered a success for women, someone else is going to be less successful. Social and political revolutions always have knock on effects.

Financial independence is nothing to sneer at, but there are always going to be trade offs and making men less essential could very well mean that their incentives to fulfill our ideals as husband's as father's have been cratered.

Agree, there isn't much incentive today for males to strive to be the best version of themselves.

But if women's standards are higher, in theory, wouldn't that be incentive enough?

Duh, if they are getting free sex via grinder, find no pushback companionship from a dog and daily life is satisfying at this level, what incentive is there?

So you are saying men are becoming gay video gamers with dogs? What is the incentive for women then? Why are women finding incentive and not men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Matchmakers (women) are quitting because single women have become completely unreasonable with their wish lists and high standards. The men are dating younger or are dating foreign women.

So, yes.

+1

American women have a captive audience. The vast majority of men never seek out women from other countries and it's 100% their fault. The difference in quality is night and day. I've yet to find an American male expat who prefers American women.

We have a rise in nationalism, not the other way round.