For fun: Let's be the worst Thanksgiving ever

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This one is not off to a good start. Picked 80 yr old parents up at DCA today. In the 20 minute drive home from airport found out:
1. Dad has been diagnosed with terminal cancer
2. Mom has signs of dementia and is in denial about Dad’s diagnosis
3. They need place to stay for 6-9 months due to damage to their home

And while the above was being discussed, my college senior in the backseat received a phone call to get a rejection for the job she’d been waiting to hear back about.So instead of discussing topics 1-3, my, apparently inherited, avoidance techniques kicked in and we all spent the rest of the drive home discussing the job rejection instead of topics 1-3…

“What kind of company calls to reject you at 4:30 on Thankgsiving Eve???” (Grandpa)
- The kind of company you DEFINITELY don’t want to work for. (Me)

“Why couldn’t they wait and call you on Friday or Monday?” (Grandma)
- Because they work 100 hours a week and didn’t realize tomorrow is a holiday. (DH)

“Don’t they know she is a workhorse who doesn’t know when to stop?” (Grandpa)
“And a smart, kind, beautiful Ivy League grad?” (Grandma)

And so and so on until we arrived home and I realized how incredibly thankful I am to have both of my parents, my children and spouse together one last time for the holidays.

Nice.

[Anonymous]

I remember when I was younger….like in my 20’s.
I was working at Denny’s on Thanksgiving. There was an older man, maybe sixty or so who was seated up at the counter alone.
He was just drinking a cup of coffee while reading the newspaper.

He looked so alone & sad.
It broke my heart.
He just sat at the counter for hours w/his coffee, browsing the newspaper.
Then after awhile he got up, paid for his coffee then walked out.

This was about three decades ago but it made me think that being alone on Thanksgiving must be one of the roughest situations to ever find oneself in…..

[Anonymous]

I am your phone. I’m silent. Is your friend’s family coming over today or aren’t they? They have come for the past 6 years. When you invited them this year, they said yes with the caveat that their very disorganized relatives may try to pull something off this year and then they’d feel obligated to go. But silence since then. I may ping later with a text asking you what time they should come…or…I may not. It will be a Thanksgiving surprise.

[Anonymous]

I am your SIL’s feral four year old, screaming at the top of my lungs when I’m excited, unhappy, tired, or told to sit down. Rather than being sent to my room to calm down, I’m going to crawl under the dinner table and bite your leg. While my mom laughs and says I’m playing dinosaur.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This one is not off to a good start. Picked 80 yr old parents up at DCA today. In the 20 minute drive home from airport found out:
1. Dad has been diagnosed with terminal cancer
2. Mom has signs of dementia and is in denial about Dad’s diagnosis
3. They need place to stay for 6-9 months due to damage to their home

And while the above was being discussed, my college senior in the backseat received a phone call to get a rejection for the job she’d been waiting to hear back about.So instead of discussing topics 1-3, my, apparently inherited, avoidance techniques kicked in and we all spent the rest of the drive home discussing the job rejection instead of topics 1-3…

“What kind of company calls to reject you at 4:30 on Thankgsiving Eve???” (Grandpa)
- The kind of company you DEFINITELY don’t want to work for. (Me)

“Why couldn’t they wait and call you on Friday or Monday?” (Grandma)
- Because they work 100 hours a week and didn’t realize tomorrow is a holiday. (DH)

“Don’t they know she is a workhorse who doesn’t know when to stop?” (Grandpa)
“And a smart, kind, beautiful Ivy League grad?” (Grandma)

And so and so on until we arrived home and I realized how incredibly thankful I am to have both of my parents, my children and spouse together one last time for the holidays.

You win. I hope you’re able to enjoy the holiday! Keep your humor.

[Anonymous]

I am your FIL’s dirty fingers, coming in to break off a piece of whatever you are cooking.

[Anonymous]

I’m the single bottle of white Zinfandel that your mom bought for 10 people to share.

[Anonymous]

I’m the microwave oven that MIL and BIL use to “finish cooking” their turkey every damn year, after which they will be amazed that so many people think the turkey is moist because theirs was “a bit dry dear, but nothing that the gravy couldn’t cover up.”

[Anonymous]

It's me, covid. Just doing a quick pass through! I'll say hi to everyone real quick and then I have to get along to the next gathering!

[Anonymous]

I am the “easy” pie you made last night!

Hahaha JK. I was not easy and now I am delightfully ruined. No pie for you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's me, covid. Just doing a quick pass through! I'll say hi to everyone real quick and then I have to get along to the next gathering!

Hey there, Covid! It's me, influenza strain A. This is the best Thanksgiving I've had in years!

[Anonymous]

I’m your lactose intolerant brother who refuses lactose free milks, and consumes a large amount of cheese.

[Anonymous]

I'm your mother-in-law, here to criticize your home, cooking, children's wardrobe, and possible weight gain. I'm just trying to help, really.

[Anonymous]

This thread is hilarious!

Way too many carbs.
Do today’s calories count?
One more piece of pie.

Breakfast glass of wine?
Takes the edge off the crazy
Family antics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I remember when I was younger….like in my 20’s.
I was working at Denny’s on Thanksgiving. There was an older man, maybe sixty or so who was seated up at the counter alone.
He was just drinking a cup of coffee while reading the newspaper.

He looked so alone & sad.
It broke my heart.
He just sat at the counter for hours w/his coffee, browsing the newspaper.
Then after awhile he got up, paid for his coffee then walked out.

This was about three decades ago but it made me think that being alone on Thanksgiving must be one of the roughest situations to ever find oneself in…..

I’ve been that person. The reality though is that moment was one of the happiest for me. Sitting alone, being able to quietly read a newspaper and drink coffee with no interruption, no rush, nowhere to go, is a thrill I rarely experienced. Being alone doesn’t mean a person feels lonely.