Do Asian elders typically go to nursing homes?

[Anonymous]

I would do pretty much anything to avoid relegating my parents to it. (Born here with Indian immigrant parents).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would do pretty much anything to avoid relegating my parents to it. (Born here with Indian immigrant parents).

+1, also a second gen Indian American. I’ve told my DH I’d like to have my mom move into an ADU on our property when the time comes. I appreciate that there may also come a time where I will not be able to care for her because of her medical needs, for the reasons mentioned here, so I would certainly be willing to revisit that decision. But as long as my mom is of sound mind and we are able to care for her, I plan to do so. That was what I grew up with and I feel really fortunate that I had my grandmother with me for large parts of my childhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m pretty sure that a residential care facility I pass daily in Silver Spring was established by the Korean American community.

Then there’s these facilities:

Howard County and Baltimore County, Maryland

Lorien Health Services Korean Senior Care Centers

Lorien Health Services offers three Korean Senior Care Centers in the state of Maryland: Columbia, Mays Chapel, and Golden Living. All three locations provide residents with traditional meals cooked by Korean chefs, Korean games like yoot, and Korean newspapers and TV shows. Staff speak multiple languages and visiting pastors host religious ceremonies in Korean. Across the three centers, seniors can access skilled nursing care, assisted living services, ventilator care, and independent living.

Ellicott City, Maryland

Morning Glory Assisted Living

Morning Glory Assisted Living is an assisted living home with room to care for eight elderly Korean-speaking residents. Best of all, individuals who qualify for the Medicaid waiver may be able to receive full financial aid to live at Morning Glory. Give its website a look to learn more — it's primarily written in Korean!

Probably a long shot, but does anyone know whether there’s something similar in the area for the Mandarin-speaking community? My 80-something ILs logically understand that their house is too much for them but are also fighting the idea of moving into any kind of senior residence. The cultural aspects never occurred to me, and I think the idea would be more appealing if they had that draw of food and language.

(To answer the OP’s question, I imagine modern living conditions have an influence at least as large as traditional cultural norms. More women are working outside the home and aren’t available for high-needs elder care, plus the high cost of housing, at least in cities, makes it harder to buy/rent a home with enough space for extended families. We have a tiny DC condo and can’t afford something much larger, so taking in parents is logistically impossible no matter what the cultural background or expectations.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In Japan they try to pair Kindergartens with nursing homes, so that the little kids can visit the elders regularly. It made my Grandma so happy, because she was really a child herself, and my K-aged children were here in the US - not exactly great for weekly visits.

My mother and I were just talking about this tonight! Both her biological grandchild and honorary grandchildren have reached their teens and 20s, and she misses having a child around. She said having a school program in their senior complex would brighten her whole life. Seems like a win-win, too, assuming the elderly residents are functional enough to guide, entertain, and/or tutor the kids.

[Anonymous]

Asians used to have joint families, love/respect for elderly, females tend to be SAHM and hiring help was rather affordable, hence it was doable to care for elders at home. Also there were no good nursing homes and often unaffordability, guilt, social condemnation were deciding factors.

Asian-American families here are in a different world. They have nuclear families and female working so its tougher to do it at home. Asian-Americans who immigrated as adults, often get their parents here and end up caring for them at home as parents are familiar with life here and it's difficult to adopt in old age. Many doesn't understand english well enough so its tougher for them to live in a nursing home.

Its tough regardless of race, both on elderly and for caregiver, specially if caregiver has small children, bad health or limited budget.

[Anonymous]

Human race has yet to find ways to make last decades of life comfortable and dignified, specially if you don't have financial resources.

[Anonymous]

We need to find better solutions for old age, neither keeping elderly at home nor leaving them in facilities is a good option.

[Anonymous]

Every single one of us (if we get to live long enough) has to age and face difficult years or decades, its just a matter of time so its a common problem and needs all to help resolve it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Human race has yet to find ways to make last decades of life comfortable and dignified, specially if you don't have financial resources.

I recently read Atul Gawande’s “Being Mortal,” thanks to a recommendation on this subforum, and that was basically the takeaway. It was a great book with a few hopeful notes, but the overall picture was depressing.

[Anonymous]

There is do much imbalance in this world.

So many people don't get enough to eat but so much food is wasted.

So much money is spent on experimental and cosmetic procedures but so many people don't get basic life saving medical care.

So many students get ivy full rides but so many can't afford state schools.

So many illegal migrants get support, so many citizens are struggling.

There are serious planning and distribution issues.

Our focus should be on basics for all.

[Anonymous]

+1 to the PP question about Mandarin speaking nursing homes in the DMV. Any info would be much appreciated!

[Anonymous]

After my mom died, my father and sibling moved to my parents home country. Life is affordable, including in home care, driver, cleaners, etc. they own a home in a cosmopolitan city with great private hospitals, uber, delivery from great restaurants, Amazon, etc. American retirement funds stretch far there and my father is living in dignity, speaking his mother tongue, eating his native food, in his religious tradition surrounded by relatives and trusted caregivers. I would recommend others consider it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Japan they try to pair Kindergartens with nursing homes, so that the little kids can visit the elders regularly. It made my Grandma so happy, because she was really a child herself, and my K-aged children were here in the US - not exactly great for weekly visits.

My mother and I were just talking about this tonight! Both her biological grandchild and honorary grandchildren have reached their teens and 20s, and she misses having a child around. She said having a school program in their senior complex would brighten her whole life. Seems like a win-win, too, assuming the elderly residents are functional enough to guide, entertain, and/or tutor the kids.

This would be a great model to have all over. Just needs to well supervised. Sometimes dementia can present with some alarming behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After my mom died, my father and sibling moved to my parents home country. Life is affordable, including in home care, driver, cleaners, etc. they own a home in a cosmopolitan city with great private hospitals, uber, delivery from great restaurants, Amazon, etc. American retirement funds stretch far there and my father is living in dignity, speaking his mother tongue, eating his native food, in his religious tradition surrounded by relatives and trusted caregivers. I would recommend others consider it.

Which country is this? I am looking to move overseas when I retire.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:+1 to the PP question about Mandarin speaking nursing homes in the DMV. Any info would be much appreciated!

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There is a place called Jarher in Rockville MD. I looked into it but my mom speaks a different dialect so she might as well be Korean. They run day care centers for seniors out there in Rockville. This facility has that and an assisted living portion. Maybe a good fit for your parents!