Did you DH take his paternity leave?

[Anonymous]

My husband took off 3 weeks for both kids. First was in the NICU for 2 weeks so he really only got one week of her being at home before he had to go back to work

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

[Anonymous]

OP's DH has a generous parental leave. My DH only has 7 business days.

Anywho, yes he took it.

[Anonymous]

11 years ago, my husband took...8 weeks? Whatever the max was he could get paid on sick leave from the feds. Concurrent with the birth and the first 8 weeks -- so great for bonding, so glad he did it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Yes, just like they would pick up the slack if someone was hospitalized, injured, died, or quit.

With parental leave you have the benefit of advanced notice. If the employer chooses not to hire temporary help, that is on the employer, not on the parent. It is the employer’s responsibility to understand people may not be able to come to work for a variety of reasons and to adjust business practices, NOT on the employees to sacrifice their well-being so their employer (who makes WAY more money) can get out of doing a bit of extra work.

[Anonymous]

You need to use your words rather than just being disappointed and silent.

“No, you cannot go to the conference”

“No, you cannot take only 2 weeks of leave”

Men are in general very selfish. The only way to get what you need is to be just as selfish.

[Anonymous]

Yes, twice, DH took unpaid FMLA. The first time, he took two weeks off after the baby was born and the rest two months later after my mom left. The second time, he took two weeks off after the baby was born and the rest 12 weeks later after my leave was over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You need to use your words rather than just being disappointed and silent.

“No, you cannot go to the conference”

“No, you cannot take only 2 weeks of leave”

Men are in general very selfish. The only way to get what you need is to be just as selfish.

This

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

yes, also, caring for a child you helped create is sooo snowflakey

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

yes, also, caring for a child you helped create is sooo snowflakey

DP. I’m not opposed at all to paternity leave, but this BS “give everyone the same amount” is absurd. It totally undercuts women who work at small companies who can’t afford to give every single employee 12 weeks off paid with every child. Men don’t give birth, despite this weird narrative going around. Part of maternity leave is recuperating from the body upheaval one goes through after giving birth. Men should be able to take a couple of weeks to bond and help out while the woman is in the thick of healing. Beyond that, yeah it’s pretty snowflake-y, judging by the fact that humanity has been around for thousands of years and *just now* men feel entitled to three months off PAID after every birth of their kid.

Can we just get universal paid maternity leave for women first? Can we just start there? Sheesh.
-millennial

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

yes, also, caring for a child you helped create is sooo snowflakey

DP. I’m not opposed at all to paternity leave, but this BS “give everyone the same amount” is absurd. It totally undercuts women who work at small companies who can’t afford to give every single employee 12 weeks off paid with every child. Men don’t give birth, despite this weird narrative going around. Part of maternity leave is recuperating from the body upheaval one goes through after giving birth. Men should be able to take a couple of weeks to bond and help out while the woman is in the thick of healing. Beyond that, yeah it’s pretty snowflake-y, judging by the fact that humanity has been around for thousands of years and *just now* men feel entitled to three months off PAID after every birth of their kid.

Can we just get universal paid maternity leave for women first? Can we just start there? Sheesh.
-millennial

I totally disagree.

For thousands of years, men HAVE been actively involved in raising their infants the first few months. Human babies require more care and attention than any other animal, and we wouldn’t have survived if only mothers cared for babies.

Men do need the extra rest, because they are also getting up multiple times a night to help out those first few months.

And most importantly, research has found men with longer paternity leave spend more time on childcare. This is extremely important for children’s well being AND for women, as a man who participates more with his children eases the burden placed on moms for childcare. If men are also able to leave work early, have flexible hours, take time off for doctor’s appointments, etc that is less responsibility placed on moms.

Also, I own a small business and bottom line is that if I can’t afford to give parental leave, I can’t afford to hire someone. I’ve found it is more cost effective and better for my business overall if I invest the money in hiring the right person and giving them things like leave, rather than hiring someone less qualified and then cleaning up their mistakes and having to hire a new person when they decide not to come back after having a baby. There are MANY other ways to help woman-owned businesses that are more effective than just excusing them from giving parental leave.

And I don’t buy the “recovery” argument. I recovered right away after both my births. Even after a c section, I was back to 100% within a few days. Does that mean I should have to go back to work earlier than someone who needs the full 12 weeks?

[Anonymous]

You have to figure this out before getting pregnant. First kid my husband only took 2 weeks. I asked what he’s planning to take next time. Told him if he can’t take the full amount then I can’t have another child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

yes, also, caring for a child you helped create is sooo snowflakey

DP. I’m not opposed at all to paternity leave, but this BS “give everyone the same amount” is absurd. It totally undercuts women who work at small companies who can’t afford to give every single employee 12 weeks off paid with every child. Men don’t give birth, despite this weird narrative going around. Part of maternity leave is recuperating from the body upheaval one goes through after giving birth. Men should be able to take a couple of weeks to bond and help out while the woman is in the thick of healing. Beyond that, yeah it’s pretty snowflake-y, judging by the fact that humanity has been around for thousands of years and *just now* men feel entitled to three months off PAID after every birth of their kid.

Can we just get universal paid maternity leave for women first? Can we just start there? Sheesh.
-millennial

I totally disagree.

For thousands of years, men HAVE been actively involved in raising their infants the first few months. Human babies require more care and attention than any other animal, and we wouldn’t have survived if only mothers cared for babies.

Men do need the extra rest, because they are also getting up multiple times a night to help out those first few months.

And most importantly, research has found men with longer paternity leave spend more time on childcare. This is extremely important for children’s well being AND for women, as a man who participates more with his children eases the burden placed on moms for childcare. If men are also able to leave work early, have flexible hours, take time off for doctor’s appointments, etc that is less responsibility placed on moms.

Also, I own a small business and bottom line is that if I can’t afford to give parental leave, I can’t afford to hire someone. I’ve found it is more cost effective and better for my business overall if I invest the money in hiring the right person and giving them things like leave, rather than hiring someone less qualified and then cleaning up their mistakes and having to hire a new person when they decide not to come back after having a baby. There are MANY other ways to help woman-owned businesses that are more effective than just excusing them from giving parental leave.

And I don’t buy the “recovery” argument. I recovered right away after both my births. Even after a c section, I was back to 100% within a few days. Does that mean I should have to go back to work earlier than someone who needs the full 12 weeks?

LMAO. What planet are you living on??? Women have always done most of the work after childbirth. Why do you think breastfeeding is pushed? Hint: It means men can sleep through the night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still can’t believe paternity leave is a thing. Do others have to pick up his slack when he’s gone? Does it take two people to care for a baby? My kids were born on a Tuesday and a Wednesday. DH was back at work Monday each time.

Shut up.

Yet another spoiled whiner. You will never be the Greatest Generation. The Snowflake Generation, maybe.

What exactly did the greatest generation do that was so great?

yes, also, caring for a child you helped create is sooo snowflakey

DP. I’m not opposed at all to paternity leave, but this BS “give everyone the same amount” is absurd. It totally undercuts women who work at small companies who can’t afford to give every single employee 12 weeks off paid with every child. Men don’t give birth, despite this weird narrative going around. Part of maternity leave is recuperating from the body upheaval one goes through after giving birth. Men should be able to take a couple of weeks to bond and help out while the woman is in the thick of healing. Beyond that, yeah it’s pretty snowflake-y, judging by the fact that humanity has been around for thousands of years and *just now* men feel entitled to three months off PAID after every birth of their kid.

Can we just get universal paid maternity leave for women first? Can we just start there? Sheesh.
-millennial

I totally disagree.

For thousands of years, men HAVE been actively involved in raising their infants the first few months. Human babies require more care and attention than any other animal, and we wouldn’t have survived if only mothers cared for babies.

Men do need the extra rest, because they are also getting up multiple times a night to help out those first few months.

And most importantly, research has found men with longer paternity leave spend more time on childcare. This is extremely important for children’s well being AND for women, as a man who participates more with his children eases the burden placed on moms for childcare. If men are also able to leave work early, have flexible hours, take time off for doctor’s appointments, etc that is less responsibility placed on moms.

Also, I own a small business and bottom line is that if I can’t afford to give parental leave, I can’t afford to hire someone. I’ve found it is more cost effective and better for my business overall if I invest the money in hiring the right person and giving them things like leave, rather than hiring someone less qualified and then cleaning up their mistakes and having to hire a new person when they decide not to come back after having a baby. There are MANY other ways to help woman-owned businesses that are more effective than just excusing them from giving parental leave.

And I don’t buy the “recovery” argument. I recovered right away after both my births. Even after a c section, I was back to 100% within a few days. Does that mean I should have to go back to work earlier than someone who needs the full 12 weeks?

The woman-owned business angle is so weird. Lots of regs are inconvenient for small businesses and *this* is the one you seize on??

Also, special millennial PP, look up stats on how many women have c-sections. It's a significant percentage. Are those women supposed to ignore doctors' orders not to lift anything but their baby, not drive, etc. for 6 weeks??? Not everyone has a mom living next door to help out or money to pay a full time nanny.