Getting over Covid Fights

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You are dumb and hysterical, and you should do him a favor and move out.

And he is selfish and uncaring and she would be better off without him.

See how that works?

He was right though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

Unfortunately, that's not the way pandemics work. She may be at little risk of serious illness, but if she hasn't had a booster she can still get infected and infect someone else who may not be vaccinated, be elderly, poor immune system, etc. And that person can infect someone and so on. "Over" would imply she doesn't need to take any precautions or worry about interacting with others, masking and the like. She should still think about these things, she doesn't have to hide under the bed, if only to help protect others.

[Anonymous]

In this thread:

1/3 of posters: “OP IS HYSTERICAL.”

1/3 of posters: “I don’t think we should place any blame but op is hysterical.”

1/3 of posters: *actually hysterical*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

Unfortunately, that's not the way pandemics work. She may be at little risk of serious illness, but if she hasn't had a booster she can still get infected and infect someone else who may not be vaccinated, be elderly, poor immune system, etc. And that person can infect someone and so on. "Over" would imply she doesn't need to take any precautions or worry about interacting with others, masking and the like. She should still think about these things, she doesn't have to hide under the bed, if only to help protect others.

How does any of this help OP? She may be right but she’s still in a dead end relationship.

[Anonymous]

This one is tough because while I ultimately think OP is right - he should've been more sensitive - none of us anticipated last year or how it would affect us or how we would repsond.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does being 30 have to do with it? If he doesn't respect you, bye!

He’s older. He’s an Executive (hence the C level suite name drop). And they aren’t married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The issue here is not that he had different COVID safety feelings than you did. It's that he doesn't see your feelings as equal to his own. You sound incompatible in a number of ways and it sounds like you should break up for that reason. It is not going to get better with his extended family. His public health safety feelings are not going to change to be more like yours - if anything, he probably already agrees with his family and will change to be more like that.

You are not compatible. If you're staying for money or desperation, recognize that the things you are upset about right now are not going to get any better, period.

Darn straight family is important to me. And my DW is my most important family. I do think you are staying for the money, so think carefully how much that life of comfort will cost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

Sure but if she married SO, and gets pregnant, suddenly she and baby are very vulnerable to still birth etc while pandemic rages

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does being 30 have to do with it? If he doesn't respect you, bye!

He’s older. He’s an Executive (hence the C level suite name drop). And they aren’t married.

I don't think he's older. I think she was saying he felt the need to make an appearance to SEE the execs and get facetime with them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This one is tough because while I ultimately think OP is right - he should've been more sensitive - none of us anticipated last year or how it would affect us or how we would repsond.

OP This is why I haven't moved out yet. I do think it was really hard for everyone. Not just anxious folks like me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does being 30 have to do with it? If he doesn't respect you, bye!

He’s older. He’s an Executive (hence the C level suite name drop). And they aren’t married.

OP Not by much. He's 34. His boss is c-suite and would plan these monthly happy hours during covid. The other c-suite people would be invited and he felt obligated to go (but I think he wanted to)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does being 30 have to do with it? If he doesn't respect you, bye!

He’s older. He’s an Executive (hence the C level suite name drop). And they aren’t married.

OP Not by much. He's 34. His boss is c-suite and would plan these monthly happy hours during covid. The other c-suite people would be invited and he felt obligated to go (but I think he wanted to)

So he had to choose between managing your anxiety or advancing his career? He chose his career. This is who he is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

Unfortunately, that's not the way pandemics work. She may be at little risk of serious illness, but if she hasn't had a booster she can still get infected and infect someone else who may not be vaccinated, be elderly, poor immune system, etc. And that person can infect someone and so on. "Over" would imply she doesn't need to take any precautions or worry about interacting with others, masking and the like. She should still think about these things, she doesn't have to hide under the bed, if only to help protect others.

Are you a guy? It sounds like you and the OP should get together. You can have date nights where you hide under your bed together as the years just keep on rolling by...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last year, I had very bad covid anxiety. Post-vaccine, it has gotten much better and I'm pretty much back to normal except for wearing a mask when required by a business.

However, I think I resent my significant other for some things he did last year that I deemed unsafe, both at the time and still in hindsight. For example, frequent work happy hours. His boss would frequently host these indoor happy hours at restaurants (because that's what he was comfortable with) and invite the C-suite level leadership - so my SO felt obligated to go make an appearance. I specifically remember during an argument once, when I told him I was uncomfortable with this, he basically said he wasn't thrilled about it but that he needed to for work. Anyway, we have been living together for a couple of years at this point, and now that covid is over, I kind of just want to move on but I also kind of think he's not the one if he couldn't see it from my perspective and just stay home, and maybe I should move out? But I'm 30, so that factors in as well.

I don't see where the OP's SO was being disrespectful or dismissive of OP. He said didn't want to do it, but needed to for work. Given that they are not married, I can understand his prioritizing his career. What happens to his career if she dumps him, as many on this board are advising her to do? If they were married I could kind of see making a decision that might harm your career for your spouse.

BTW OP, Covid is far from over.

She is a vaccinated 30yo with no children. It’s over for her. Or do you want her to keep being anxious so you can call her hysterical.

Unfortunately, that's not the way pandemics work. She may be at little risk of serious illness, but if she hasn't had a booster she can still get infected and infect someone else who may not be vaccinated, be elderly, poor immune system, etc. And that person can infect someone and so on. "Over" would imply she doesn't need to take any precautions or worry about interacting with others, masking and the like. She should still think about these things, she doesn't have to hide under the bed, if only to help protect others.

Are you a guy? It sounds like you and the OP should get together. You can have date nights where you hide under your bed together as the years just keep on rolling by...

For shit's sake. One of you thinks she's hysterical for following public health guidance before being vaccinated, the other thinks she's irresponsible for resuming normal life post-vaccine. My god, you and PP should really date each other because you're both insane.