Why don’t parents file more police reports?

[Anonymous]

As a teacher, I have wished that some parents would file charges, because then the kid could be ordered into therapy by the courts or moved to a more appropriate placement. A lot of parents don’t get their kids help and it would get that help much more quickly if parents would call the police. I’m talking about serious issues,nit kindergarten biting or third grade pinching, unless it went on and on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

- and yet, here on DCUM, there is some person posting the lie that “assaults are not really happening.”

Question is:

- why is that person spreading a lie? What is their agenda?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A few years ago, they probably expected the schools to handle it by expelling the student.

Now, they probably know the school will do nothing but don’t want to call the cops because they don’t want to be cancelled.

But I agree with you. If someone assaults my kids, I’m pressing charges. I don’t care if it happens at school or not.

What do you consider assault? When a kindergartner bites another kid? When a 3rd grader hits another kid because he didn’t like the way a game ended? When a middle schooler trips a kid in the hallway as a joke? When another kid gets jealous of a toy or something and pushes them down to get it? I’ve seen all of these things and I wouldn’t consider any one of them assault.

DP. Anything that leaves a physical mark, especially past upper elementary. With the exception of the biting, the rest of the things you mentioned wouldn’t warrant that. A closed fist punch, a shove hard enough to cause a hard fall and bruising, a puncture wound from being stabbed with a pen? Yes. I wouldn’t press charges if a kindergartner bit my kid but I’d make it clear that better be the last time or I’d escalate the issue. You get kicked out of daycare or private preschool for that. I’m not sure why it’s expected to be tolerated in kindergarten or first grade.

Who are you escalating the biting to, the principal? What will they do? Make the kid develop/mature faster?

NP. Not trying to derail...but if a kid kept biting my kid, yes I would escalate. Are you saying you wouldn't and would just let some kid keep biting your kid? I might let it slide once, maybe twice, but after that, we got a problem that needs to be addressed (not by the police).

Yep, the problem may be that they are intellectual disabled or stunted in another way developmentally. These kids are in school. You’re kid will survive a bite or two.

Yeah. No. One of us is rolling out, most likely the biter. My kid will survive a bite, but why would I expect my kid to put up with it. That sets a bad example for your kid accepting abuse, even from other children. The fact that they are are in school is irrelevant. At what age does it stop? If there is a child in class that is that intellectually disabled or otherwise developmentally deficient that kid needs to be removed. When children was in kindergarten, bitting was strictly monitored and dealt with. After three instances, the child was counseled out.

I'm digressing and obviously triggered....so let me move on.

There’s not any counseling out in public school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

- and yet, here on DCUM, there is some person posting the lie that “assaults are not really happening.”

Question is:

- why is that person spreading a lie? What is their agenda?

Maybe their kid's school doesn't have this happening? I work in an urban school district. Assaults are nothing new. I feel like kids are just much touchier now. Little things set them off. There are quite a few kids who say that went after other kids because "they were looking at me." I have kindergarten students trying to stab other kids with pencils, 2nd graders smacking each other with their backpacks, and 5th graders jumping other students after school. I cannot even imagine what the middle schoolers are doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

+1

The PPs saying assaults "don't happen" are the PPs who have troublesome kids. Anger prone parents have anger prone kids. No surprise there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

Can you at least share your district?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a teacher, I have wished that some parents would file charges, because then the kid could be ordered into therapy by the courts or moved to a more appropriate placement. A lot of parents don’t get their kids help and it would get that help much more quickly if parents would call the police. I’m talking about serious issues,nit kindergarten biting or third grade pinching, unless it went on and on.

Some parents fail their kids miserably, I have seen it in very wealthy areas of the DC area.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because assaults are not really happening IRL.

Teacher here. I see assaults happening at least 1-2 days a week in my school. It has gotten worse since I started 10 years ago. This year has been pretty awful.

You are a required reporter so you are breaking the law…. Or you are lying.

[Anonymous]

We did after a year of no action from the school. The police considered it harassment. We moved, but I know the police went to the school. The principal was told that he was failing to keep ds safe, and creating an environment that encouraged harassment and bullying.

There was a school assembly that parents were encouraged to attend, led by police. It was a very small town. Nothing changed until there was a new principal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We did after a year of no action from the school. The police considered it harassment. We moved, but I know the police went to the school. The principal was told that he was failing to keep ds safe, and creating an environment that encouraged harassment and bullying.

There was a school assembly that parents were encouraged to attend, led by police. It was a very small town. Nothing changed until there was a new principal.

So your child was harassed not assaulted?

[Anonymous]

This is such a delicate thing. I would hesitate to file a police report on a child because I don’t want a childhood mistake, during a phase they would most likely outgrow, to follow them for the rest of their lives on the other hand I want my child to feel safe in school. So it would depend on what the child does..sexual assault, injury with knife etc. absolutely; persistent bullying I will remove my child from the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We did after a year of no action from the school. The police considered it harassment. We moved, but I know the police went to the school. The principal was told that he was failing to keep ds safe, and creating an environment that encouraged harassment and bullying.

There was a school assembly that parents were encouraged to attend, led by police. It was a very small town. Nothing changed until there was a new principal.

So your child was harassed not assaulted?

Correct. We would have called police immediately if he had been physically assaulted.

We are still in touch with one person from there. One of the worst offenders for harassing ds has been charged with domestic violence as an adult. He beats his wife and kids when daily berating doesn't work for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A few years ago, they probably expected the schools to handle it by expelling the student.

Now, they probably know the school will do nothing but don’t want to call the cops because they don’t want to be cancelled.

But I agree with you. If someone assaults my kids, I’m pressing charges. I don’t care if it happens at school or not.

What do you consider assault? When a kindergartner bites another kid? When a 3rd grader hits another kid because he didn’t like the way a game ended? When a middle schooler trips a kid in the hallway as a joke? When another kid gets jealous of a toy or something and pushes them down to get it? I’ve seen all of these things and I wouldn’t consider any one of them assault.

DP. Anything that leaves a physical mark, especially past upper elementary. With the exception of the biting, the rest of the things you mentioned wouldn’t warrant that. A closed fist punch, a shove hard enough to cause a hard fall and bruising, a puncture wound from being stabbed with a pen? Yes. I wouldn’t press charges if a kindergartner bit my kid but I’d make it clear that better be the last time or I’d escalate the issue. You get kicked out of daycare or private preschool for that. I’m not sure why it’s expected to be tolerated in kindergarten or first grade.

Children have a right to a free appropriate public education in the least restrictive environment where can be reasonably successful. There's no similar right to daycare or private preschool.

Obviously the school should provide appropriate supports to reduce the risk of biting or other injuries. But try to keep things in perspective. Your kid can handle most bites another kid might do. But think of the damage you'll do to the other kid if you successfully kick them out of class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A few years ago, they probably expected the schools to handle it by expelling the student.

Now, they probably know the school will do nothing but don’t want to call the cops because they don’t want to be cancelled.

But I agree with you. If someone assaults my kids, I’m pressing charges. I don’t care if it happens at school or not.

What do you consider assault? When a kindergartner bites another kid? When a 3rd grader hits another kid because he didn’t like the way a game ended? When a middle schooler trips a kid in the hallway as a joke? When another kid gets jealous of a toy or something and pushes them down to get it? I’ve seen all of these things and I wouldn’t consider any one of them assault.

DP. Anything that leaves a physical mark, especially past upper elementary. With the exception of the biting, the rest of the things you mentioned wouldn’t warrant that. A closed fist punch, a shove hard enough to cause a hard fall and bruising, a puncture wound from being stabbed with a pen? Yes. I wouldn’t press charges if a kindergartner bit my kid but I’d make it clear that better be the last time or I’d escalate the issue. You get kicked out of daycare or private preschool for that. I’m not sure why it’s expected to be tolerated in kindergarten or first grade.

Children have a right to a free appropriate public education in the least restrictive environment where can be reasonably successful. There's no similar right to daycare or private preschool.

Obviously the school should provide appropriate supports to reduce the risk of biting or other injuries. But try to keep things in perspective. Your kid can handle most bites another kid might do. But think of the damage you'll do to the other kid if you successfully kick them out of class.

The rights of the bully must come before the rights of the victim - is that your argument?