Can cheating be justified?

[Anonymous]

I’m in a loveless, neglect-filled, verbally abusive marriage with kids and a spouse who is mentally disordered and won’t acknowledge his diagnoses, symptoms or seek help- let alone be honest with any doctor.
I trudge through and even my own father said he wishes I found a Boyfriend.

It sux doing everything in a lonely abusive marriage in a Country where the court system gives abusers continued opportunity to neglect and abuse their children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The simple answer is no. But I’ve never been in a position that would lead me consider it so the complex answer is yes.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in a loveless, neglect-filled, verbally abusive marriage with kids and a spouse who is mentally disordered and won’t acknowledge his diagnoses, symptoms or seek help- let alone be honest with any doctor.
I trudge through and even my own father said he wishes I found a Boyfriend.

It sux doing everything in a lonely abusive marriage in a Country where the court system gives abusers continued opportunity to neglect and abuse their children.

Truth. My DH's own family told me to find a boyfriend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend with three children who has been separated from her husband for two years and he refuses to get a divorce. He has substance abuse problems and been in and out of rehab, has a difficult time holding a job and has had to have restraining orders laid on him. It’s a mess. If she “cheated” on him tomorrow I’d have no problem with it.

I hope you wouldn’t think it was ok to do this with a married man. It is incredibly frustrating as a blindsided betrayed spouse for women to talk about their cheating affair partners as their saviors when 99% of these men were worse to their wives then they’re husbands were to them.

[Anonymous]

^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

As a 51-year old female 26-year GS-15 Fed, I applaud those betrayed men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

As a 51-year old female 26-year GS-15 Fed, I applaud those betrayed men.

Wrong thread!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend with three children who has been separated from her husband for two years and he refuses to get a divorce. He has substance abuse problems and been in and out of rehab, has a difficult time holding a job and has had to have restraining orders laid on him. It’s a mess. If she “cheated” on him tomorrow I’d have no problem with it.

I hope you wouldn’t think it was ok to do this with a married man. It is incredibly frustrating as a blindsided betrayed spouse for women to talk about their cheating affair partners as their saviors when 99% of these men were worse to their wives then they’re husbands were to them.

PP - it would not be ok with a married man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

This is exactly why I have such a problem with affairs. It is a form of abuse, often of betrayed women that have no means to leave the marriage.

[Anonymous]

I stopped wearing my ring and my selfish a-hole “spouse” didn’t even notice for two years. He doesn’t notice his own kids talking to him either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I stopped wearing my ring and my selfish a-hole “spouse” didn’t even notice for two years. He doesn’t notice his own kids talking to him either.

My spouse stopped wearing it during an affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

Nope. You must have zero experience here.

People trapped in $hitty marriages and have the wherewithal to know it, know how to ask wet OPs question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I stopped wearing my ring and my selfish a-hole “spouse” didn’t even notice for two years. He doesn’t notice his own kids talking to him either.

My spouse stopped wearing it during an affair.

I stopped wearing it because it reminded me of my a-hole spouse. No affair. I have completely disassociated from him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a friend with three children who has been separated from her husband for two years and he refuses to get a divorce. He has substance abuse problems and been in and out of rehab, has a difficult time holding a job and has had to have restraining orders laid on him. It’s a mess. If she “cheated” on him tomorrow I’d have no problem with it.

I hope you wouldn’t think it was ok to do this with a married man. It is incredibly frustrating as a blindsided betrayed spouse for women to talk about their cheating affair partners as their saviors when 99% of these men were worse to their wives then they’re husbands were to them.

My spouse is mentally delusional so i have declared it an open marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^their

And they are contributing to the abuse and trauma of another woman because men in affairs are more critical, mean and abusive to their wives during that time to justify banging the OW.

If she wants to find a salvation with a single man so be it, but don’t walk into another woman’s marriage and contribute to her and her children’s pain.

This is exactly why I have such a problem with affairs. It is a form of abuse, often of betrayed women that have no means to leave the marriage.

It’s better than being driven insane by a psychopath spouse who’s never around anyhow.