If your kid asks how they played, do you tell the truth?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

[Anonymous]

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.


I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.


I have 2 kids that play top 10 D1 sports, but okay.

They also have sports psychologist in college paid for by the school.

Fact... you don't know the game as well as their coach, stop thinking you know better or are "right" or know "the truth".

Right, I am sure.

[Anonymous]

I want my kid to be intrinsically motivated and analyze his own performance. I would ask a bunch of questions in response first. Start with, Why do you ask? And keep going. You can weave feedback in but it should be in support of his own exploration process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

No you should provide support not feedback.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I want my kid to be intrinsically motivated and analyze his own performance. I would ask a bunch of questions in response first. Start with, Why do you ask? And keep going. You can weave feedback in but it should be in support of his own exploration process.

This^^^

[Anonymous]

Parents … the worst part of sports

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ReKw6J5tK2c

[Anonymous]

I only comment on sportsmanship unless it's a sport I've played, then I respond the same--I give one area she excelled and one area with some instruction to do differently (ie, better) the next time.

[Anonymous]

THE truth? No, I give him my perspective, my obversations, etc. But I usually ask him the questions (you enjoy it, what parts, etc).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

No you should provide support not feedback.

protect the meal ticket dont be a yes man.

[Anonymous]

The car ride home

https://www.coachup.com/nation/articles/the-car-ride-home--why-so-many-kids-quit

When I played sports a gazillion years ago I had a friend beg me to carpool home after games so her parents would couch their “review” of her play on the car ride home.

[Anonymous]

Luckily for us I guess our kids don't ask us how they did. We just ask them if they had fun and that's it. If they want to talk more about their game or whatever they will on their own and we just listen. If they are hard on themselves then we try to put it into context for them and/or ask them if their friend did the same thing/had the same thing happen to them would they really be mad at their friend etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

No you should provide support not feedback.

Uh huh. Yeah. Sure. Thanks Coach. Parenting is fine. Parenting includes feedback. Constructive feedback. School, sports, life. You should try it sometimes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DS asked me how he played yesterday, and I responded, "you weren't bad, but you weren't your usual self either. Probably because you had trouble sleeping last night." DH is now claiming that I gave a mean answer to DS, and am not being encouraging. DS is 13 years old, and I feel like I gave a what I perceived as an accurate answer to a question that DS asked. I would never have said anything either way unless DS asked. Do people see anything wrong with my answer?

1. You are not a professional coach.
2. You did not play soccer professionally or in the Olympics
3. You suck as a parent

Get help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

No you should provide support not feedback.

Uh huh. Yeah. Sure. Thanks Coach. Parenting is fine. Parenting includes feedback. Constructive feedback. School, sports, life. You should try it sometimes.

You are the problem in youth sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Say, I'm not sure, then ask open ended questions.

Why at the end of the 1st you sent it long, when you could have possessed?
When you took it to the goal should you have taken 1 less touch?
What happened with the corner kick?


I think an average 13 year old (after an eye roll) will interpret this series of questions as:
1. poor passing choice at the end of the 1st.
2. shoot earlier on goal.
3. bad corner kick.

I agree. This person must have a much younger kid, or be seriously underestimating the intelligence of your average U13 kid.

Also, a kid that knows the game will say

1. We decided to play defense we were up by 1, we only had 2 minutes on the clock and we didn't want to go into 1/2 time tied.
2. I thought the goalie would come out, he didn't so yea in hindsight probably could have shot.
3. I jumped too high it hit my chest instead of my head.

They know, they are smart, their coach is the person that should give them feedback.

Not true at all the coach , the teammates, and the family. are all a part of the athletes support team. All should play a part in helping the athlete. All should provide feedback

No you should provide support not feedback.

Uh huh. Yeah. Sure. Thanks Coach. Parenting is fine. Parenting includes feedback. Constructive feedback. School, sports, life. You should try it sometimes.

You are the problem in youth sports.

No, actually. You are.