Am I the only one who doesn't feel bored as a stay at home mom?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

When I asked the OP how she filled her day I did not hope for this kind of mundane minutae. I think I am just going to have to kill myself now, so bored.

Life IS mundane minutiae. A bunch of boring, routine moments with sprinkling of excitement. I know so many people who go to work every day thinking, I’m so bored; kill me now!

and the 2+ hours in traffic five days a week? Now that's a life waster. How many people are sitting in their cars on 495 thinking "kill me now"? That would be me.

+1
Talk about soul-sucking.

Why is the answer to SAH, instead of to find a job with a shorter commute, or one that allows telecommuting?

I'm going to say this as clearly as possible, to hopefully clear up any confusion on your part. We chose to stay home with our kids because WE WANTED TO. Getting rid of a pointless, wasteful commute was merely a bonus.

Are you actually on this thread with the intention of making us all feel like we should be WOHMs again? How would you react if we were trying to persuade you to SAH against your wishes? It really seems so many of you never learned what feminism really means. Hint: it doesn't mean WOH just to prove some sort of point.

Then why talk about the commute as soul sucking? Why single that part of WOH out? If you SAH because you wanted to, I am not sure what the point is in posting with a bunch of other SAHMs just to agree that SAH is not boring but very fulfilling.

Wow. You can't leave this thread, can you? You simply can't go because this is all eating you alive. SAHMs discussing how fulfilled they are - GAHHH!! On their own thread, even!! This will not stand! MUST TROLL!

But why not, I'll indulge you. Ditching the commute was a bonus, as a PP said. A cherry on top of the cupcake that is staying home with one's children.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Newsflash: Raising kids is a contribution to society.

Newsflash: you can raise kids, plus have a career.

You can. Or you can stay home. Or you can work for part of their lives and stay home for part. We all get to decide. Life is crazy like that.

+100
I'm thinking there are some very dense and defensive women here who simply don't "approve" of SAHMs, so they try and couch their disdain in terms of feminism. They're really looking foolish.

How does choosing to SAH in 2017 differ from having to SAH in 1963?

I'll speak (write) slowly, just for you.
IT.IS.A.CHOICE.NOW.WHEREAS.IT.USED.TO.SIMPLY.BE.THE.DEFAULT.

Wow. Dense doesn't even begin to cover it.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I really love it but maybe I'm doing it wrong!

as everyone knows. you have to have vagina to do this. not sure what happened to feminism. all the rich liberals in our mclean neighborhood have the wives stay at home.

Which goes to show feminism is alive and well. Good for these women for choosing something that was important to them and to their families. Oh, and to society. Having choices is what it's all about. Clearly, you didn't get the memo in your Womyns Studies 101 class.

How many men who are not downsized "choose" to be SAHDs? If we didn't need feminism, more men would take on the at home parent role.

They do have that choice, they just don't exercise it as often.

And why is that?

Oh, I don't know (DP). Maybe personal preference? But you wouldn't understand that. Complex concepts are hard.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

When I asked the OP how she filled her day I did not hope for this kind of mundane minutae. I think I am just going to have to kill myself now, so bored.

Exactly how I felt while on the 9-5 treadmill. Couldn't wait to end that misery and be at home with my children. Yes, there are some "boring" days while at home, but I'd much rather have a few of those with my kids, than be bored at work, without my kids. Different strokes and all that.

But unless you keep having babies, at some point kids are gone 30+ hours each week. What will you do with your time then?

Well, I imagine I'll be involved with other interests and volunteering. Or perhaps I'll head back to work at that point. Why do you assume SAH is a lifetime decision?

The larger question is, of course, why do you care so much about what other women do with their time? I certainly don't care about or concern myself with *your* choices.

I was hoping you had a plan for your life when you started SAH. And you're certainly not going to go back to a career after being at home for 15+ years.

Maybe you can mentor her or someone like her when she goes back to working full time. Isn't that what we should do as women, support each other's choices? It's okay to like what you do, and no one choice is more valid than another. Stop resenting other women. We are individuals. And let's reject ALL of the patriarchal molds, from mandatory housewife to corporate power-drone. Balance is everything in a happy life and healthy society.

+100
But please, don't let someone like her mentor anyone. Sounds like she's the one who could use the mentoring. Or therapy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Newsflash: Raising kids is a contribution to society.

Newsflash: you can raise kids, plus have a career.

You can. Or you can stay home. Or you can work for part of their lives and stay home for part. We all get to decide. Life is crazy like that.

+100
I'm thinking there are some very dense and defensive women here who simply don't "approve" of SAHMs, so they try and couch their disdain in terms of feminism. They're really looking foolish.

How does choosing to SAH in 2017 differ from having to SAH in 1963?

I'll speak (write) slowly, just for you.
IT.IS.A.CHOICE.NOW.WHEREAS.IT.USED.TO.SIMPLY.BE.THE.DEFAULT.

Wow. Dense doesn't even begin to cover it.

Same result though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are there people who claim to be bored as a stay at home mom? I haven't met anyone who said that.

I know literally know no one IRL who feels bored at home. There's a ton of stuff to do. Only boring, uncreative people get bored - regardless of work status.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay op - tell us, how do you fill your days? (plus what is your highest educational degree level, if at all?)

Not OP, but this was my day today:

I’m a SAHM with a SAC

Got DD to the bus at 8:30. Came home, made beds and tidied up, and then went for a run. Got back, showered, sat down to have coffee and breakfast and catch up on some news and check emails, etc.

Turned on a podcast and cleaned the bathrooms. Put away some laundry. After that, I drove to pick up something I bought on a mom2mom site, went to the post office to throw some cards in the mail, then went to Costco.

Came home, put away the things from Costco, and then ate lunch. After lunch, I went outside and cleaned up some yard debris for garbage day tomorrow. I came inside, put on another podcast and prepped a casserole for dinner. I then cleaned the kitchen.

Next, I sat down to watch a 30min episode of a Netflix show, and then left for school pickup at 3:45.

I have a BA and I’m happier at home than I ever was at work. I’m never bored. I find ways to fill my day. Sometimes with mundane tasks, always with exercise, and always with either a book or some other literature, or interesting podcast.

I am beginning to understand why 30 years of this would make someone has unintelligent as my MIL. You are just taking up space.

When I asked the OP how she filled her day I did not hope for this kind of mundane minutae. I think I am just going to have to kill myself now, so bored.

Life IS mundane minutiae. A bunch of boring, routine moments with sprinkling of excitement. I know so many people who go to work every day thinking, I’m so bored; kill me now!

and the 2+ hours in traffic five days a week? Now that's a life waster. How many people are sitting in their cars on 495 thinking "kill me now"? That would be me.

+1
Talk about soul-sucking.

Why is the answer to SAH, instead of to find a job with a shorter commute, or one that allows telecommuting?

I'm going to say this as clearly as possible, to hopefully clear up any confusion on your part. We chose to stay home with our kids because WE WANTED TO. Getting rid of a pointless, wasteful commute was merely a bonus.

Are you actually on this thread with the intention of making us all feel like we should be WOHMs again? How would you react if we were trying to persuade you to SAH against your wishes? It really seems so many of you never learned what feminism really means. Hint: it doesn't mean WOH just to prove some sort of point.

Then why talk about the commute as soul sucking? Why single that part of WOH out? If you SAH because you wanted to, I am not sure what the point is in posting with a bunch of other SAHMs just to agree that SAH is not boring but very fulfilling.

Wow. You can't leave this thread, can you? You simply can't go because this is all eating you alive. SAHMs discussing how fulfilled they are - GAHHH!! On their own thread, even!! This will not stand! MUST TROLL!

But why not, I'll indulge you. Ditching the commute was a bonus, as a PP said. A cherry on top of the cupcake that is staying home with one's children.

DP. If you think she's a troll, why do you respond? Your responses (and those of other SAHMs that go off on the trolls) make you sound worse than she does. Just ignore...repeat to yourself...ignore...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok, I'm starting to believe that SAHM might be bored, they have spent a LOT of effort on this thread.

Hey at least it’s a thread that applies to me. Can you imagine all of these busy world saving working moms taking all this time to not work and not care for their kids- because they are taking time to insult others? Man.

You're not taking care of your kids either. Glass houses and all that...

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:The implication in this thread is that staying at home is preferable to working and the women posting that they aren’t bored seem to b8e gloating about it. So that is what is bringing out the venom from the working moms. Maybe I should start a thread about how great it is to be a working mom and see how the SAHMs respond.

Go ahead. I do think staying home is great. That is why I do it. Why should I pretend that it sucks? If you prefer working, fine by me.

Seriously! I agree completely. Besides which, we hear all the time from these DCUM WOHMs how they vastly prefer working to SAH. Doesn't bother me or affect me one iota.

If you're totally secure that you are using your intellectual ability and won't regret the time at home, it shouldn't bother you.

I know, right? Kind of like the way you and your fellow harpies aren't insecure AT ALL about the mere existence of a thread in which SAHMs are saying how much they love being home. It doesn't bother you one bit.

Why are you descending to name-calling? I know there has been no reciprocal name calling of SAHMs. What was said that raised vitriol to this degree?

Well, let's see. No SAHMs have pushed their way into a thread that has *NOTHING* to do with them, and then proceeded to tell WOHMs that they've made the wrong choices, blah blah blah. So why would anyone feel the need to call SAHMs a name? We were enjoying what was a lovely thread, talking amongst ourselves about why we chose to SAH and what we love about it. No one invited the harpies - yes, harpies - in to criticize us, but displaying their usual lack of control, they came anyway. That's why they're being called harpies. And if you think that displays "vitriol," I'd have to say the SAHMs on this thread have displayed more restraint and maturity when dealing with the bitter trolls than I've ever seen from any of the troll WOHMs. Ever.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The implication in this thread is that staying at home is preferable to working and the women posting that they aren’t bored seem to b8e gloating about it. So that is what is bringing out the venom from the working moms. Maybe I should start a thread about how great it is to be a working mom and see how the SAHMs respond.

Go ahead. I do think staying home is great. That is why I do it. Why should I pretend that it sucks? If you prefer working, fine by me.

Seriously! I agree completely. Besides which, we hear all the time from these DCUM WOHMs how they vastly prefer working to SAH. Doesn't bother me or affect me one iota.

If you're totally secure that you are using your intellectual ability and won't regret the time at home, it shouldn't bother you.

I know, right? Kind of like the way you and your fellow harpies aren't insecure AT ALL about the mere existence of a thread in which SAHMs are saying how much they love being home. It doesn't bother you one bit.

Why are you descending to name-calling? I know there has been no reciprocal name calling of SAHMs. What was said that raised vitriol to this degree?

Lol, there seems to be one woh poster who has really lost it.

The PP above you asked a good question. Stop with the troll-y business.

DP here, but are you joking? There is indeed one troll on this thread and we all know it. Have you even read the entire thread?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:NP. Sorry but the SAHMs on this thread have lost the high ground. Lots of name calling. When will you learn to ignore the trolls? It makes you look foolish and insecure when you take the bait. Just ignore and have your little pow wow. I don’t know a single working mom who wastes time worrying about what SaHMs are doing.

Oh, please. The only person (or people) who has "lost the high ground" is the idiot who just can't tolerate women making the choice to stay home, and she plans to tell us that until she's blue in the face. Everyone else was having a great discussion until she (or they) rolled in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I loved it. Every day. It went so fast, and the kids grew up so fast. Never second guess if you can do it.

Completely agree. Those are years I will never, ever regret.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The implication in this thread is that staying at home is preferable to working and the women posting that they aren’t bored seem to b8e gloating about it. So that is what is bringing out the venom from the working moms. Maybe I should start a thread about how great it is to be a working mom and see how the SAHMs respond.

Go ahead. I do think staying home is great. That is why I do it. Why should I pretend that it sucks? If you prefer working, fine by me.

Seriously! I agree completely. Besides which, we hear all the time from these DCUM WOHMs how they vastly prefer working to SAH. Doesn't bother me or affect me one iota.

If you're totally secure that you are using your intellectual ability and won't regret the time at home, it shouldn't bother you.

I know, right? Kind of like the way you and your fellow harpies aren't insecure AT ALL about the mere existence of a thread in which SAHMs are saying how much they love being home. It doesn't bother you one bit.

Why are you descending to name-calling? I know there has been no reciprocal name calling of SAHMs. What was said that raised vitriol to this degree?

Lol, there seems to be one woh poster who has really lost it.

The PP above you asked a good question. Stop with the troll-y business.

Get your own thread. Jesus. You are annoying.

Amen. Get your own thread, PP, since you seem to want to turn this thread into your own private soapbox.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The implication in this thread is that staying at home is preferable to working and the women posting that they aren’t bored seem to b8e gloating about it. So that is what is bringing out the venom from the working moms. Maybe I should start a thread about how great it is to be a working mom and see how the SAHMs respond.

Go ahead. I do think staying home is great. That is why I do it. Why should I pretend that it sucks? If you prefer working, fine by me.

Seriously! I agree completely. Besides which, we hear all the time from these DCUM WOHMs how they vastly prefer working to SAH. Doesn't bother me or affect me one iota.

If you're totally secure that you are using your intellectual ability and won't regret the time at home, it shouldn't bother you.

I know, right? Kind of like the way you and your fellow harpies aren't insecure AT ALL about the mere existence of a thread in which SAHMs are saying how much they love being home. It doesn't bother you one bit.

Why are you descending to name-calling? I know there has been no reciprocal name calling of SAHMs. What was said that raised vitriol to this degree?

Lol, there seems to be one woh poster who has really lost it.

So asking why you feel the conversation warrants calling other moms ugly names is 'losing it'? I definitely am lost b/c that doesn't make sense either.

You feel "harpy" is an "ugly name"? Um... have you ever taken note of the TRULY ugly names some of these women call SAHMs? You must be new to DCUM.

And yes, you are lost. You should find another thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I really love it but maybe I'm doing it wrong!

as everyone knows. you have to have vagina to do this. not sure what happened to feminism. all the rich liberals in our mclean neighborhood have the wives stay at home.

Which goes to show feminism is alive and well. Good for these women for choosing something that was important to them and to their families. Oh, and to society. Having choices is what it's all about. Clearly, you didn't get the memo in your Womyns Studies 101 class.

How many men who are not downsized "choose" to be SAHDs? If we didn't need feminism, more men would take on the at home parent role.

They do have that choice, they just don't exercise it as often.

And why is that?

Conditioned to think it is not valuable. Just like you. I happen to disagree.

If women are SAH out of free choice today, and not "conditioned" to think they can't raise their children well with a FT job outside the home, then give me a little credit. I don't enjoy the domestic arts and I really enjoy getting up and going to work. I don't even think my WOH is valuable primarily for the money, I see no need to SAH for my particular family setup and children.

DP here. What are you even talking about? Who has told you to SAH? You sound more than a little defensive, and yet the only people telling others what to do (or not do) on this thread are - you guessed it - the resident WOHM troll(s).