What's weird about where you are staying - Thanksgiving 2024 edition

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know this thread is intended in jest and there are some great stories. But I am also shocked at how spineless some grown adults are! If visiting family is miserable or abusive in any way, STOP DOING IT! It's not mandatory. Many people eat Thanksgiving with only their nuclear family. You can also do that. Travel and multiple nights in an environment that makes you crazy is not neccessary. You are a grown up. Its OK to make your own tradition.

Saying it from the perspective of someone who stepped away from the tradition to get away from the abuse: these kinds of people don’t leave you alone just because you’re “making your own tradition” or because you’re a grown up. In the fall, I can’t pickup the phone, check my texts or my emails without being berated by my elderly mother or being scolded by people she’s charged with doing her dirty work. A lot of people on her have made the calculation that a few days’ suffering is better than months of punishment.

If the facts are on your side, this shouldn't be an issue. One or two explanations "We aren't coming because it's not an enjoyable environment." And then some concession that you can stomach "would you be interested in coming to Susie's band recital next weekend?" Or "we are available to face time at X", then you just move on.

If others come at you, again, explain calmly and without theatrics. Ask if there is a common ground they could agree to. Wish them a happy holiday and move on.

I just think so many people want the drama because to them it means family and it’s obligatory. And that is sad.

Please start a new thread for discussing abuse. Please do not ruin this thread for people dealing with the bizarre, the ridiculous, and faintly disturbing family that is mostly just weird, funny, and inexplicable.

Pp was on topic. Get over your need for “funny.” DP

As my dad would say "Someone got up on the wrong side of the the bed".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My folks passed away 30 years ago and I've been the host of the family holidays ever since. With pretty much zero help. I live for these threads and at this point in my life am taking notes on how to implement a number of these things bc I'm so sick of hosting.

And yes, I've basically screamed "I AM NO LONGER WILLING TO HOST" and nothing happens. Then I'm left feeling bad for my youngest kid who still thinks the holidays are magical and loves the family togetherness (and tbt is the one and only person that helps.......with anything). He's a senior in college and I'm secretly hoping he gets a job on the other side of the country so that I claim visiting him on holidays.

Keep the stories coming!

Similar story here, except about 3 years ago I decided that’s it—not doing it again. The massive amount of work it takes to host is worse than sleeping in a kiddie bed if you ask me. Of course neither is pleasant. But still.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

I feel your pain. I am looking at a frozen turkey sitting on the counter. It was fully defrosted LAST YEAR and then REFROZEN when a contingent family did not make it up from the twin cities. This is an 18 pounder. Early tomorrow morning, crimes against nature will be committed in order to finish the thawing. This is one of many attempts on our lives that have/will occur this Thanksgiving. I’m going to go eat a snickers bar and have a Bloody Mary. They don’t believe in food allergies or food safety here, but they believe in large supplies of junk food and nobody monitors your drinking. #winnng

RED PLASTIC BIN IN THE FREEZER LADY PLEASE COME BACK

No, no, no, no, NO. Tell you don't have children who will be eating that killer turkey!

There are children here but none on my watch will eat the Turkey. All of the sane adults work together to protect ourselves and the innocents. The perpetrators don’t get sick. I don’t know if they’ve evolved to have cast iron stomachs or if it’s the alcohol (I’m indulging, not judging, but they drink SO MUCH).

My mother is 97, lives in her home on her own and still drives. She's never had cancer, has normal cholesterol etc. She is a unicorn according to my internist, who doesn't believe she exists. She still gardens and does stuff on her own. She has never been a person concerned with eating healthy foods. She has always eaten a lot of vegetables and few sweets but she's Southern and loves her Southern food. She's never had a heart attack, heart issues, or strokes. She lives in the hot South. She leaves food out all the time. We just visited and she made sausage and biscuits several mornings and they sat out all day. We didn't realize and the first day, most of us had stomach issues. I'm pretty certain she has poisoned herself so many times with every possible food borne illness that it has killed anything that can kill her.

My mom is only 78 but is like this (and also a Southerner). She doesn’t wash her hands, leaves food out, eats old leftovers; licks the spoon, doesn’t stay away from sick people, etc. and never gets sick. There have been holidays when every single one of us catches a stomach bug, she is right in the mix without taking any precaution, and she is the only one who avoids it. My BIL says she’s like a cockroach.

This whole generation is like this. I virtually never saw my mother wash her hands. Even after using the bathroom. It’s pretty gross.

There is a theory that the increase in allergies is due to having a more sterile environment. Antidotes like these make me wonder if we’re the ones doing something wrong and these old ladies have the right idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am hosting my parents for Thanksgiving week and made sure to stock up on their preferred grocery items, etc. But they are very unhappy that we do not have cable so they can’t watch MSNBC at top volume all day long!

My sister comes for the day to my place for Thanksgiving and then both of us stay at my parents’ for Christmas… but as our families have grown, the guest room space there has gotten less comfortable. Because her kids are “bad sleepers” and can’t share rooms, DH and I have ended up on an air mattress in the den with one dc. So it might be time for a hotel!

Definitely time for a hotel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

I feel your pain. I am looking at a frozen turkey sitting on the counter. It was fully defrosted LAST YEAR and then REFROZEN when a contingent family did not make it up from the twin cities. This is an 18 pounder. Early tomorrow morning, crimes against nature will be committed in order to finish the thawing. This is one of many attempts on our lives that have/will occur this Thanksgiving. I’m going to go eat a snickers bar and have a Bloody Mary. They don’t believe in food allergies or food safety here, but they believe in large supplies of junk food and nobody monitors your drinking. #winnng

RED PLASTIC BIN IN THE FREEZER LADY PLEASE COME BACK

No, no, no, no, NO. Tell you don't have children who will be eating that killer turkey!

There are children here but none on my watch will eat the Turkey. All of the sane adults work together to protect ourselves and the innocents. The perpetrators don’t get sick. I don’t know if they’ve evolved to have cast iron stomachs or if it’s the alcohol (I’m indulging, not judging, but they drink SO MUCH).

My mother is 97, lives in her home on her own and still drives. She's never had cancer, has normal cholesterol etc. She is a unicorn according to my internist, who doesn't believe she exists. She still gardens and does stuff on her own. She has never been a person concerned with eating healthy foods. She has always eaten a lot of vegetables and few sweets but she's Southern and loves her Southern food. She's never had a heart attack, heart issues, or strokes. She lives in the hot South. She leaves food out all the time. We just visited and she made sausage and biscuits several mornings and they sat out all day. We didn't realize and the first day, most of us had stomach issues. I'm pretty certain she has poisoned herself so many times with every possible food borne illness that it has killed anything that can kill her.

My mom is only 78 but is like this (and also a Southerner). She doesn’t wash her hands, leaves food out, eats old leftovers; licks the spoon, doesn’t stay away from sick people, etc. and never gets sick. There have been holidays when every single one of us catches a stomach bug, she is right in the mix without taking any precaution, and she is the only one who avoids it. My BIL says she’s like a cockroach.

This whole generation is like this. I virtually never saw my mother wash her hands. Even after using the bathroom. It’s pretty gross.

There is a theory that the increase in allergies is due to having a more sterile environment. Antidotes like these make me wonder if we’re the ones doing something wrong and these old ladies have the right idea.

Maybe. When I was in India, our driver brought up cleanliness quite a bit. He said that we Westerners are more subject to infection because we don’t have good immune systems because we keep everything too clean. I suppose it’s possible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The no food in rooms thing I get. We are militant about that because we get ants otherwise. Food in kitchen and dining room only.

Agreed.

Also agree. Not sure what is wrong with deterring ants and other critters.

You guys don’t read. It’s not that anyone opposes the “no food in bedroom” rule, it’s that someone’s dad freaked out because their kid threw away a wrapper ***from a bag of chips eaten previously during travel*** in the bedroom trash. Like, if you can’t handle teens throwing away empty, pre-eaten-before-they-arrived trash in a trash can, you are not fit to have guests. Period.

Thank you. And I will take it a step further, can’t we be a little flexible for guests?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

I feel your pain. I am looking at a frozen turkey sitting on the counter. It was fully defrosted LAST YEAR and then REFROZEN when a contingent family did not make it up from the twin cities. This is an 18 pounder. Early tomorrow morning, crimes against nature will be committed in order to finish the thawing. This is one of many attempts on our lives that have/will occur this Thanksgiving. I’m going to go eat a snickers bar and have a Bloody Mary. They don’t believe in food allergies or food safety here, but they believe in large supplies of junk food and nobody monitors your drinking. #winnng

RED PLASTIC BIN IN THE FREEZER LADY PLEASE COME BACK

No, no, no, no, NO. Tell you don't have children who will be eating that killer turkey!

There are children here but none on my watch will eat the Turkey. All of the sane adults work together to protect ourselves and the innocents. The perpetrators don’t get sick. I don’t know if they’ve evolved to have cast iron stomachs or if it’s the alcohol (I’m indulging, not judging, but they drink SO MUCH).

My mother is 97, lives in her home on her own and still drives. She's never had cancer, has normal cholesterol etc. She is a unicorn according to my internist, who doesn't believe she exists. She still gardens and does stuff on her own. She has never been a person concerned with eating healthy foods. She has always eaten a lot of vegetables and few sweets but she's Southern and loves her Southern food. She's never had a heart attack, heart issues, or strokes. She lives in the hot South. She leaves food out all the time. We just visited and she made sausage and biscuits several mornings and they sat out all day. We didn't realize and the first day, most of us had stomach issues. I'm pretty certain she has poisoned herself so many times with every possible food borne illness that it has killed anything that can kill her.

My mom is only 78 but is like this (and also a Southerner). She doesn’t wash her hands, leaves food out, eats old leftovers; licks the spoon, doesn’t stay away from sick people, etc. and never gets sick. There have been holidays when every single one of us catches a stomach bug, she is right in the mix without taking any precaution, and she is the only one who avoids it. My BIL says she’s like a cockroach.

This whole generation is like this. I virtually never saw my mother wash her hands. Even after using the bathroom. It’s pretty gross.

Same here on the hand washing, and my mom was a nurse. Never washed hands coming in from outdoors or after the bathroom. I started doing both once I had a baby, which is pretty late to discover hygiene.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re driving to my in laws today. It promises to be a disastrous thanksgiving. My son is meeting us tomorrow, and hopefully he’s up to helping out. My MIL refused to cater thanksgiving 6 weeks ago when we still had the option, and now there will be no caregiver for my ill FIL on thanksgiving day, so now she wants to cater.

It’s too late to cater - and we bought a turkey. And all the fixings to bring with us. So I will be cooking (hopefully with my sons help), while my husband is on urinal duty and caring for FIL. My husband usually cooks the turkey. Wish me luck.

Oh, and the oven is on the fritz.

Lots of people cook Thanksgiving dinner and the turkey is the easiest piece. Get over it.

It isn't the easiest "piece". It's actually hard not to turn the breast to sawdust if you don't have experience. It's also a huge heavy lethal bacteria factory as all fowl is in this country, so step off. It's actually tricky. So many people ruin turkey and it's the main reason people don't love it.

It is the easiest piece. Follow the directions on the turkey. Or follow the Ina recipe that I posted above.

[Anonymous]

My little nephew is “helping” with the pies… interspersed with throwing a slobbery tennis ball for their puppy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cereal for breakfast. Do not know when any other food is happening.

You expect a cooked breakfast on Thanksgiving? You are the problem. Forage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cereal for breakfast. Do not know when any other food is happening.

You expect a cooked breakfast on Thanksgiving? You are the problem. Forage.

+1

What’s wrong with cereal, on Thanksgiving of all days? Reminds me of the poster who wanted to disrupt her host’s Thanksgiving prep to cook a full hot breakfast for her “adult boys” because they’d simply wither away if they ate a bagel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am hosting my parents for Thanksgiving week and made sure to stock up on their preferred grocery items, etc. But they are very unhappy that we do not have cable so they can’t watch MSNBC at top volume all day long!

My sister comes for the day to my place for Thanksgiving and then both of us stay at my parents’ for Christmas… but as our families have grown, the guest room space there has gotten less comfortable. Because her kids are “bad sleepers” and can’t share rooms, DH and I have ended up on an air mattress in the den with one dc. So it might be time for a hotel!

Say more. Does one of their kids sleep with them? Or do they get their own room, their kids each get their own room, and your family is in the den? Why aren’t THEY in the den?

Each of her kids gets a bedroom and she and her DH get a bedroom. My parents consider her the fragile one and me the “hardy” one. I absolutely love her and my kid is a good sleeper but any attempt to adjust the imbalance has led to pouting and threats from her DH.

[Anonymous]

My parents downsized several years ago so I've been hosting. But my sibling just moved back to the area and is excited to host this year and I'm lounging on my couch this morning, not cleaning and it is so relaxing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom proudly told me on Monday that she just finished cooking the turkey so she can re-heat it for us Thursday.

I feel your pain. I am looking at a frozen turkey sitting on the counter. It was fully defrosted LAST YEAR and then REFROZEN when a contingent family did not make it up from the twin cities. This is an 18 pounder. Early tomorrow morning, crimes against nature will be committed in order to finish the thawing. This is one of many attempts on our lives that have/will occur this Thanksgiving. I’m going to go eat a snickers bar and have a Bloody Mary. They don’t believe in food allergies or food safety here, but they believe in large supplies of junk food and nobody monitors your drinking. #winnng

RED PLASTIC BIN IN THE FREEZER LADY PLEASE COME BACK

No, no, no, no, NO. Tell you don't have children who will be eating that killer turkey!

There are children here but none on my watch will eat the Turkey. All of the sane adults work together to protect ourselves and the innocents. The perpetrators don’t get sick. I don’t know if they’ve evolved to have cast iron stomachs or if it’s the alcohol (I’m indulging, not judging, but they drink SO MUCH).

My mother is 97, lives in her home on her own and still drives. She's never had cancer, has normal cholesterol etc. She is a unicorn according to my internist, who doesn't believe she exists. She still gardens and does stuff on her own. She has never been a person concerned with eating healthy foods. She has always eaten a lot of vegetables and few sweets but she's Southern and loves her Southern food. She's never had a heart attack, heart issues, or strokes. She lives in the hot South. She leaves food out all the time. We just visited and she made sausage and biscuits several mornings and they sat out all day. We didn't realize and the first day, most of us had stomach issues. I'm pretty certain she has poisoned herself so many times with every possible food borne illness that it has killed anything that can kill her.

My mom is only 78 but is like this (and also a Southerner). She doesn’t wash her hands, leaves food out, eats old leftovers; licks the spoon, doesn’t stay away from sick people, etc. and never gets sick. There have been holidays when every single one of us catches a stomach bug, she is right in the mix without taking any precaution, and she is the only one who avoids it. My BIL says she’s like a cockroach.

This whole generation is like this. I virtually never saw my mother wash her hands. Even after using the bathroom. It’s pretty gross.

There is a theory that the increase in allergies is due to having a more sterile environment. Antidotes like these make me wonder if we’re the ones doing something wrong and these old ladies have the right idea.

Typhoid Mary got dozens of people sick becuase—even after she knew it was her getting people sick—she continued to not wash her hands after taking a dump. Stop being disgusting and wash your damn hands.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Cereal for breakfast. Do not know when any other food is happening.

You expect a cooked breakfast on Thanksgiving? You are the problem. Forage.

+1

What’s wrong with cereal, on Thanksgiving of all days? Reminds me of the poster who wanted to disrupt her host’s Thanksgiving prep to cook a full hot breakfast for her “adult boys” because they’d simply wither away if they ate a bagel.

Haha, seriously.