DC Urban Moms Farce

[Anonymous]

hi! i'm a thirty something mom, a gen X but really relate to millenials. the park I go to has no signal!!!!! i can't believe there is a place where I can't text or upload to facebook! i'm a private person only connect with 75 of my BF daily. my mom just bought us a great house in gtown. i can't believe how OLD the other moms are and they don't talk to me!! the park is sooo boring i just need some casual conversation. should i have my mom talk with them and make them be my friend? my mom is great she wrote to my employer and got them to give me an extra week of maternity leave. these OLD moms seem really old and boring why would you not want to have kids early and get it out the way? why don't they like me? why would go to a park if you don't want to talk with moms? i just don't get it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 103 but look 60 years younger. Everyone says so. I take great care of myself, eat well and exercise, so I probably look better than you spring chickens. I partied like a rock star until I was 55, then felt grown up enough to spend 15 years earning a Masters degree. (I once knew a girl who did that when she was 22-24, but since she had children shortly afterward, I'm sure she ended up in a trailer park.) I went on to have a great career and traveled all over the world. There's no way I was mature enough to be a parent any earlier, and if I couldn't have done it, then no one else could possibly have, either. I wouldn't change a thing. After all, Boomers never have any regrets. There are too many of us to serve as yes men for each other. Even my pregnancies (when I was 95 and 98) were easy. I never felt sick a single day since I had hardly any hormones left. Don't you know that the laws of the natural world no longer apply for my generation? 95 is the new 34.

Best one yet.

[Anonymous]

Help! My two day old newborn is not sleeping through the night! Is this normal? What can I do to extend his sleep times?

Also, sometimes he nurses for looooong periods of time and other times he doesn't seem interested. Should I keep offering until he takes it?

Lastly: what type of baby carrier won't hurt my back?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

Lighten up. This is the farce thread. I am going to give it a guess and assume that the correct spelling was not used on purpose.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Help! My two day old newborn is not sleeping through the night! Is this normal? What can I do to extend his sleep times?

Also, sometimes he nurses for looooong periods of time and other times he doesn't seem interested. Should I keep offering until he takes it?

Lastly: what type of baby carrier won't hurt my back?

Haven't you read the book? The book will give you the answer to this question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

Lighten up. This is the farce thread. I am going to give it a guess and assume that the correct spelling was not used on purpose.

it is not just the spelling, the entire context is offensive. Perhaps if you understood the purpose of a bris you would understand that it is offensive and frankly, dumb since it makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

Lighten up. This is the farce thread. I am going to give it a guess and assume that the correct spelling was not used on purpose.

it is not just the spelling, the entire context is offensive. Perhaps if you understood the purpose of a bris you would understand that it is offensive and frankly, dumb since it makes no sense.

Wow, you REALLY suck.

[Anonymous]

Hi, can anyone tell me where I should live in the DC metro area? DH and I are moving there in two weeks with a toddler and I am six months pregnant with #2. We'll need a 5br/2ba house that is 2500 square feet or more, is in a safe neighborhood, preferably with a lot of trees. We'd also like to have a full basement and an easy walk to good public schools. Our price range is $250K. Thanks!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

Lighten up. This is the farce thread. I am going to give it a guess and assume that the correct spelling was not used on purpose.

it is not just the spelling, the entire context is offensive. Perhaps if you understood the purpose of a bris you would understand that it is offensive and frankly, dumb since it makes no sense.

Wow, you REALLY suck.

Sorry to say, I agree. Ms. Defender of the Bris: please lighten up. This topic is clearly labelled "Farce" and it's managed to go twenty-plus pages and collect over a thousand views without anyone getting their panties in a twist. Why not take a breath and let it go? And if you can't, how about starting a new thread to my fully share your point of view without derailing what has been a very popular and fun thread thus far?

(BTW, please don't dismiss me as someone who doesn't understand. I'm Jewish and quite observant. I also happen to have a sense of humor . . . . )

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hi, can anyone tell me where I should live in the DC metro area? DH and I are moving there in two weeks with a toddler and I am six months pregnant with #2. We'll need a 5br/2ba house that is 2500 square feet or more, is in a safe neighborhood, preferably with a lot of trees. We'd also like to have a full basement and an easy walk to good public schools. Our price range is $250K. Thanks!

Have you looked in Rockville?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son will be 18 years old next month, and I regret not having him circumcised when he was an infant. His girlfriend has made some off-color comments to me about his excessive foreskin. Do you think it's too late for me to get him circumcised? Can anyone recommend a good moyle for a briss?

it's "mohel" not moyle and "bris" not briss, really don't use language you have no clue about-it's offensive.

Lighten up. This is the farce thread. I am going to give it a guess and assume that the correct spelling was not used on purpose.

it is not just the spelling, the entire context is offensive. Perhaps if you understood the purpose of a bris you would understand that it is offensive and frankly, dumb since it makes no sense.

I am married to a jew. I showed my DH and SIL and neither were offended.

[Anonymous]

this thread is getting stale and just a way to mock someone who disagrees with your views.. yawn

[Anonymous]

What is the best/worst (fill in the blank) thing that you or your (fill in the blank) has ever (fill in the blank)? Please respond!!

[Anonymous]

OK Miss Briss -

We can spell moyel with a y if we want. "Mohel" is Hebrew. Moyel is yiddish.

Hak mir nisht ken tshaynik

(stop going on and on and on about the same old same old)