Men 45+ on OLD: are they all broke?

[Anonymous]

OP clearly was a rigid outlook. I agree with pp, I'd be happy to go camping or something low-key with some friends/luxury trips with others. I give my friends/lovers respect, knowing they are worldly enough to enjoy a range of activities.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Wealthy men don’t need OLD to find a date. They are like a flame to moths.

This. Most of these men never are on OLD. The wealthy lawyer marries his secretary. The MD's marry RN's.

MDs marrying the nurses and lawyers marrying secretaries is definitely not the norm.

DH is a surgeon and we know a handful of doctors who met their PA or nurse wives when they were med students or during residency but they are few.

I know a lot of lawyers and can’t think of one who married a secretary. I do know many lawyers who married other lawyers.

Doctors married doctors. Lawyers married lawyers.

The one doctor nurse couple I’m thinking of are already retired. I think they met at UPEnn like 40 years ago. They were in college. Husband went to med school. Wife went to nursing school.

The other doctor who married a PA married a model looking PA when he was a resident. She was stunning and really nice. Yale has a PA school.

I wonder how hard it is to get into UPenn nursing or Yale PA school. It is a good place to meet a husband.

I know a ton of doctor-nurse couples my age (40s). All the doctors are male and non-white--about half are immigrants and the other half are born here but are kids of immigrants. The nurses (female) are almost always not only white but blonde. Seeing so many of these couples feels kind of weird, as if there's some sort of transaction going on.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I'm cheap af, and also poor by DC standards (only $1 million in the bank and $200k income).

But the bigger problem is that I have no intention of dissipating my wealth on an over-the-hill woman.

You have no wealth to dissipate.

I nearly spat out (dissipated!) my coffee. Spot on.

What kind of gold digging losers are you guys dating when all you can think about is how much the women want you for your money?

It’s not the flex you think it is.

Right!?

This is DCUM. Everyone has 3M in liquid and 10M in the market.

Actually I have $4M in liquid and about $18M in the market and properties but I didn’t want to brag. And the women I date have no idea of my wealth. I don’t pay their way and they don’t pay mine though we do pay for each other’s dinners and other things from time to time. When we traveled to places like Mallorca, Corfu, Palawan, St Kitts, Antarctica, etc we each pay our way and split costs for any shared expenses (rooms, etc). Works well that way.

Yakis - a woman who may be making 200k/year paying for her dinners with you. It would be fair if you shared expenses pro-rats your wealth. Very few people would be comparable. It’s totally different from two mid 6-figures executives sharing expenses. You are cheap IMHO

You would never know. Too many gold diggers out there.

You can simply decline taking her to an expensive restaurant for the first date; offer a coffee/drinks. If you start seeing each other, see if she reciprocates at least gets tickets for movies/theaters. But keeping scores like you do is just sick, IMHO. Being extremely wealthy, you have your girlfriends subsidize your travel: you are a wealthy kept man/toy boy. And also bitter about women.

Not even close. We pay 50/50 for our travel so no gf subsidy. And they don’t have a clue about my wealth so no harm no foul. If I ever got the slightest hint they were a gold digger I would end the relationship.

So you are cheap as F. People at your wealth level would travel business class, stay at Ritz etc. You could have just offered her to pay in what’s fair and just have a nicer vacation. But instead you find average well-off women who pay 50% traveling “economy”. Either she has to invest much higher share of her income into posh travel at your level (which is unfair as you are extremely wealthy), or you basically travel middle class. You are a cheap wealthy gigolo

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:I'm cheap af, and also poor by DC standards (only $1 million in the bank and $200k income).

But the bigger problem is that I have no intention of dissipating my wealth on an over-the-hill woman.

You have no wealth to dissipate.

I nearly spat out (dissipated!) my coffee. Spot on.

What kind of gold digging losers are you guys dating when all you can think about is how much the women want you for your money?

It’s not the flex you think it is.

Right!?

This is DCUM. Everyone has 3M in liquid and 10M in the market.

Actually I have $4M in liquid and about $18M in the market and properties but I didn’t want to brag. And the women I date have no idea of my wealth. I don’t pay their way and they don’t pay mine though we do pay for each other’s dinners and other things from time to time. When we traveled to places like Mallorca, Corfu, Palawan, St Kitts, Antarctica, etc we each pay our way and split costs for any shared expenses (rooms, etc). Works well that way.

Yakis - a woman who may be making 200k/year paying for her dinners with you. It would be fair if you shared expenses pro-rats your wealth. Very few people would be comparable. It’s totally different from two mid 6-figures executives sharing expenses. You are cheap IMHO

You would never know. Too many gold diggers out there.

You can simply decline taking her to an expensive restaurant for the first date; offer a coffee/drinks. If you start seeing each other, see if she reciprocates at least gets tickets for movies/theaters. But keeping scores like you do is just sick, IMHO. Being extremely wealthy, you have your girlfriends subsidize your travel: you are a wealthy kept man/toy boy. And also bitter about women.

Not even close. We pay 50/50 for our travel so no gf subsidy. And they don’t have a clue about my wealth so no harm no foul. If I ever got the slightest hint they were a gold digger I would end the relationship.

So you are cheap as F. People at your wealth level would travel business class, stay at Ritz etc. You could have just offered her to pay in what’s fair and just have a nicer vacation. But instead you find average well-off women who pay 50% traveling “economy”. Either she has to invest much higher share of her income into posh travel at your level (which is unfair as you are extremely wealthy), or you basically travel middle class. You are a cheap wealthy gigolo

They aren't married or even engaged.

[Anonymous]

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I finally met a lovely man. I think he runs deficit of about $700 every month. He works his tail off and didn't buy anything outrages. It's temporary and I will gladly help him fix it. I would even help him if we weren't together.

Really? You would financially help a single adult man? Mega turn off.

Yeah, nope. I’ve established my life independently and am not tying myself to just another dead weight.

So what kind of income/wealth do you expect a man to have?

Enough disposable income to match mine. Enough free time to match mine.

Sure, but what constitutes matching yours?

I'm a woman make about 300K a year. My average weekend outing is about $150; I take one large vacation a year at about $20K, couple small trips in the range of $5k. So it's about $15,000 on travel and $3600 on dates that a BF would need to match my expenses on entertainment and travel only. If we move in together, we would be saving on mortgage/rent so not a bad deal for him overall

You’re too poor for my tastes.

I don’t date men who judge women by their wallet.

What about women who judge men by their wallet? How is this any different?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Asking bc that has been my experience. Met multiple nice good looking men who all have enormous financial liabilities. Either they earn very little or are broke after divorce and are too old to fully recover, or earn well but have huge obligations and/or are cheap AF. It’s a pity bc I’ve really liked several of them, but need someone similarly secure and am not getting into a financial quagmire.

You only think they are broke. Men can smell a gold digger miles away. They go out of their way to make you think they are poor, have some fun, and then move on.

My friend’s brother used to act poor to weed out the gold diggers. He would purposely pick a hole in the wall first date restaurant. Some women only want to go to fancy restaurants.

Smart guy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm cheap af, and also poor by DC standards (only $1 million in the bank and $200k income).

But the bigger problem is that I have no intention of dissipating my wealth on an over-the-hill woman.

You have no wealth to dissipate.

I nearly spat out (dissipated!) my coffee. Spot on.

What kind of gold digging losers are you guys dating when all you can think about is how much the women want you for your money?

It’s not the flex you think it is.

Right!?

This is DCUM. Everyone has 3M in liquid and 10M in the market.

Actually I have $4M in liquid and about $18M in the market and properties but I didn’t want to brag. And the women I date have no idea of my wealth. I don’t pay their way and they don’t pay mine though we do pay for each other’s dinners and other things from time to time. When we traveled to places like Mallorca, Corfu, Palawan, St Kitts, Antarctica, etc we each pay our way and split costs for any shared expenses (rooms, etc). Works well that way.

Yakis - a woman who may be making 200k/year paying for her dinners with you. It would be fair if you shared expenses pro-rats your wealth. Very few people would be comparable. It’s totally different from two mid 6-figures executives sharing expenses. You are cheap IMHO

You would never know. Too many gold diggers out there.

There are, both genders and probably among binary and fluid ones have their share as well.

[Anonymous]

Lots of fluid diggers as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wealthy men don’t need OLD to find a date. They are like a flame to moths.

This. Most of these men never are on OLD. The wealthy lawyer marries his secretary. The MD's marry RN's.

MDs marrying the nurses and lawyers marrying secretaries is definitely not the norm.

DH is a surgeon and we know a handful of doctors who met their PA or nurse wives when they were med students or during residency but they are few.

I know a lot of lawyers and can’t think of one who married a secretary. I do know many lawyers who married other lawyers.

I know female physicians who are married to cops, firefighters, contractors, teachers etc but most married them before medical school and try to shed them before they get their first attending physician paycheck.

[Anonymous]

(So much IVF in DMV)

[Anonymous]

There are lots of male gold diggers out there. Speaking as a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm cheap af, and also poor by DC standards (only $1 million in the bank and $200k income).

But the bigger problem is that I have no intention of dissipating my wealth on an over-the-hill woman.

You have no wealth to dissipate.

I nearly spat out (dissipated!) my coffee. Spot on.

What kind of gold digging losers are you guys dating when all you can think about is how much the women want you for your money?

It’s not the flex you think it is.

Right!?

This is DCUM. Everyone has 3M in liquid and 10M in the market.

Actually I have $4M in liquid and about $18M in the market and properties but I didn’t want to brag. And the women I date have no idea of my wealth. I don’t pay their way and they don’t pay mine though we do pay for each other’s dinners and other things from time to time. When we traveled to places like Mallorca, Corfu, Palawan, St Kitts, Antarctica, etc we each pay our way and split costs for any shared expenses (rooms, etc). Works well that way.

Yakis - a woman who may be making 200k/year paying for her dinners with you. It would be fair if you shared expenses pro-rats your wealth. Very few people would be comparable. It’s totally different from two mid 6-figures executives sharing expenses. You are cheap IMHO

You would never know. Too many gold diggers out there.

You can simply decline taking her to an expensive restaurant for the first date; offer a coffee/drinks. If you start seeing each other, see if she reciprocates at least gets tickets for movies/theaters. But keeping scores like you do is just sick, IMHO. Being extremely wealthy, you have your girlfriends subsidize your travel: you are a wealthy kept man/toy boy. And also bitter about women.

Not even close. We pay 50/50 for our travel so no gf subsidy. And they don’t have a clue about my wealth so no harm no foul. If I ever got the slightest hint they were a gold digger I would end the relationship.

So you are cheap as F. People at your wealth level would travel business class, stay at Ritz etc. You could have just offered her to pay in what’s fair and just have a nicer vacation. But instead you find average well-off women who pay 50% traveling “economy”. Either she has to invest much higher share of her income into posh travel at your level (which is unfair as you are extremely wealthy), or you basically travel middle class. You are a cheap wealthy gigolo

What is so great about either the Ritz or Business Class that makes it worth all the extra money?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are lots of male gold diggers out there. Speaking as a woman.

+1. Dated a teacher who said he would be my concubine—no thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm cheap af, and also poor by DC standards (only $1 million in the bank and $200k income).

But the bigger problem is that I have no intention of dissipating my wealth on an over-the-hill woman.

You have no wealth to dissipate.

I nearly spat out (dissipated!) my coffee. Spot on.

What kind of gold digging losers are you guys dating when all you can think about is how much the women want you for your money?

It’s not the flex you think it is.

Right!?

This is DCUM. Everyone has 3M in liquid and 10M in the market.

Actually I have $4M in liquid and about $18M in the market and properties but I didn’t want to brag. And the women I date have no idea of my wealth. I don’t pay their way and they don’t pay mine though we do pay for each other’s dinners and other things from time to time. When we traveled to places like Mallorca, Corfu, Palawan, St Kitts, Antarctica, etc we each pay our way and split costs for any shared expenses (rooms, etc). Works well that way.

Yakis - a woman who may be making 200k/year paying for her dinners with you. It would be fair if you shared expenses pro-rats your wealth. Very few people would be comparable. It’s totally different from two mid 6-figures executives sharing expenses. You are cheap IMHO

You would never know. Too many gold diggers out there.

You can simply decline taking her to an expensive restaurant for the first date; offer a coffee/drinks. If you start seeing each other, see if she reciprocates at least gets tickets for movies/theaters. But keeping scores like you do is just sick, IMHO. Being extremely wealthy, you have your girlfriends subsidize your travel: you are a wealthy kept man/toy boy. And also bitter about women.

Not even close. We pay 50/50 for our travel so no gf subsidy. And they don’t have a clue about my wealth so no harm no foul. If I ever got the slightest hint they were a gold digger I would end the relationship.

So you are cheap as F. People at your wealth level would travel business class, stay at Ritz etc. You could have just offered her to pay in what’s fair and just have a nicer vacation. But instead you find average well-off women who pay 50% traveling “economy”. Either she has to invest much higher share of her income into posh travel at your level (which is unfair as you are extremely wealthy), or you basically travel middle class. You are a cheap wealthy gigolo

What is so great about either the Ritz or Business Class that makes it worth all the extra money?

+1. DP here. OMG when I read this PP I instantly thought os a gold digger I know in person. She wants to validate herself with expensive trips and "stuff", have bragging rights, and seeks her self worth by going to expensive places, like her rich relatives. But, she is doing nothing to earn that kind of money herself. I would tell my sons to run fast from this train wreck! Live within your means, people.

[Anonymous]

IYKYK