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Am I the only parent with a high IQ child who does not care to scramble for the best schools?
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Anonymous
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He is "gifted" yes, but what is so wrong with not talking about it all the time, and just sending his little gifted tail to MCPS, and waiting to hear what the teachers want me to do with (to) him.
I want him to just have fun as a child, learn the basics and not get on anyone's nerves. When he is 11, we can talk about life, grades, birds, bees, SATs, Colleges and all that. |
Anonymous
| I actually almost never talk about our child's giftedness, and never out of the context of someone specifically asking, so not sure what you mean by suggesting that others "talk about it all the time," LOL. (In fact, in my opinion, parents of truly gifted kids learn very rapidly never to mention it at all because others get hostile and think you're bragging even when you're not, so I mention it almost never and only when I have to.) We are in MoCo and for us, the issue was that our local elementary school wasn't going to do any differentiation at all--in MoCo, gifted education in the early grades is at the whim of the principal. We were literally told that DC would have to sit through learning the alphabet with the other kindergarteners even though DC was already reading at an upper-elementary level. We were likewise told that acceleration in math was dependent on staffing and was unlikely to happen (this for a child who could multiply simple numbers in his/her head at the age of three and could add two- and three-digit numbers in his/her head at four--never taught by us, BTW, DC just has a mind that thinks that way). So for us, we felt that MCPS failed us. We really wanted public school but decided that we couldn't torture our child by forcing DC to be bored all the time--and I don't think torture is too strong a word for forcing a fluent reader to sit through lessons on the alphabet most of the day. We chose a private school that would accelerate/challenge DC appropriately. We still hope to go to MCPS eventually, but so far we have been disappointed with their approach. So to answer your question, there is nothing wrong with sending your child to MCPS if you get lucky with the principal. If not, however, you may possibly end up regretting it. |
Anonymous
I'm sure you meant no offense, but it's quite clear you have no family nor friends nor even friends-of-friends in Mumbai. If you did, you would know that torture is, in fact, too strong a word. A little respect, please. |
Anonymous
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OP, if you lived in DC, it is possible you might feel differently. You might feel a sense of urgency, depending on your local zoned school.
Or you might not, but there seems to be a not-good track record of gifted kids in DCPS. So when you and your gifted minor child are someday living in a school district with take-a-chance? schools, do write us back. |
Anonymous
| If your child is happy with his/her school and how life is going there, then good for you and him/her! No need to scramble for a different type of school or education. |
Anonymous
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OP, didn't you know that 99% of the children of parents on this board have high IQs?
Amazingly, most of them go to public school. |
Anonymous
| Has there been any study to show that differentiation of kids before age 10 changes long term outcome? |
Anonymous
| I don't know, and it's a valid question, but personally I wouldn't care too much if studies found no effect. I'm primarily concerned with how my child is doing right now--not whether she's ahead or behind or by how much but whether she's happy, interested, curious, challenged, and so on. |
Anonymous
It's the interested and challenged part that can be a problem if school doesn't offer above grade level education for those who are ready for it. How long do you think your child will be interested and challenged if he/she is reading quite fluently at home, but studying individual letters and their sounds in school? And if they are not interested in what's going on in class and not challenged, how long do you think he/she will stay happy and curious in school? The answer for our child was not long ... PreK and K were OK, probably because she was occupied by getting used to the school routine and figuring out social issues. By first grade she was bored, and by second grade she was unhappy. The problem with a year by year approach to school is that when a particular school that doesn't offer challenge goes bad (if it does) for your child, other options (like private school or moving to another neighborhood for a better public school) might be off the table, depending on family circumstances. |
Anonymous
| PP, you completely misinterpreted my post. I favor differentiation. I don't care if it's shown to have long-term effects. But whatever. |
Anonymous
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We feel like slackers too, especially compared to our neighbor who calls the school every time her kid is put in a lower reading group or whatever, and who is always trying to compare grades with us.
In MCPS it does really depend on what your school is willing to do. We have been lucky school-wise, and DC is now taking math two grades ahead (which DC wanted more than we did, I'm not even sure it's a great idea given that you read about kids who do advanced math early forgetting it all by SAT time). |
Anonymous
Oh come on. This comparison is over the top. Everyone knows what PP is talking about. |
Anonymous
| The truly gifted kid is a little conundrum. I taught only G&T kids are they need JUST the right balance between work and play and it differs for each kid. And then THAT changes, it is not an easy parenting job for sure. If you do NOT challenge the kids enough academically, there can be a world of trouble that comes with boredom...I saw more of it in the later years, depression, drug use, etc. Then again, if they are worked for the sake of being worked, they lose a sense of meaningfulness and academia. There is a "what is the point?" feelings. Listen, I saw parents every day doing right by their kids, it can happen! It just needs a tad more attention than maybe, your totally average kid. But the rewards are deep! |
Anonymous
You know what? It's probably at least partially true, that your local neighborhood public school is offering your child, and others, accelerated math and other things BECAUSE of those pain in the a%% neighbors (and others before them) who always call and demand more -- more info, more services, more differentaition. I NEVER wanted to be that kind of parent -- but we're in a school where no one does anything special for kids who have already mastered the material. If you don't call and request (and complain, and demand) you don't get. Pushy obnoxious parents are a pain, but their presence does tend to get better services for kids in schools. God bless 'em. 
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Anonymous
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Thank you for your effort, really, it is appreciated!
The neighbor I'm referring too, however, is not pushing for new services. She's just trying to shoehorn her kids into the existing ones. We do find in MCPS that even in schools where advanced classes are offered, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. This applies both to unqualified kids as well as to qualified kids, because the MCPS folks seem to have a man-the-barricades mentality towards the ambitious parents of all those kids who score in the 99th percentile, that you read about on DCUM. Apparently there are more parents who feel they have qualified kids than the 10% or whatever that your school will allow to take the school's special services. Thus the aggressive approach taken by many MCPS parents (and I know quite a number!) towards getting into these advanced programs, even where they exist. Which is another thread entirely. |