Teen is all over his sister

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I totally think this is a troll. Early on she said she'd call CPS, then she got wishy washy, in order to generate more pages of responses. I haven't read everything, but first got a whiff of troll when she said that others haven't noticed anything unusual, and then said well actually other people have noticed. Something feels off about OP.

I dont think the wishy washy means troll, unfortunately. I wish this were a troll. Unfortunately people will grasp at whatever they can to avoid hard things or facing things. My mil and sil don't speak because when sil came to her and told her she was molested by her mom's brother, mil did not believe her. SIL had signs of sexual abuse and MIL used those very signs to say she couldn't trust her and therefore didn't believe her. She thought sil just needed more religion to behave better. It was a screwed up situation but how these things often go.

Adults dont want to face what is happening and they will grasp at anything to avoid it.

I wish this were a troll because I don't want it to be true. Statistically, we know these kids are out there. Most likely it is true. OP just wants to put her head in the sand and not confront it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally think this is a troll. Early on she said she'd call CPS, then she got wishy washy, in order to generate more pages of responses. I haven't read everything, but first got a whiff of troll when she said that others haven't noticed anything unusual, and then said well actually other people have noticed. Something feels off about OP.

I dont think the wishy washy means troll, unfortunately. I wish this were a troll. Unfortunately people will grasp at whatever they can to avoid hard things or facing things. My mil and sil don't speak because when sil came to her and told her she was molested by her mom's brother, mil did not believe her. SIL had signs of sexual abuse and MIL used those very signs to say she couldn't trust her and therefore didn't believe her. She thought sil just needed more religion to behave better. It was a screwed up situation but how these things often go.

Adults dont want to face what is happening and they will grasp at anything to avoid it.

I wish this were a troll because I don't want it to be true. Statistically, we know these kids are out there. Most likely it is true. OP just wants to put her head in the sand and not confront it.

PP here. I agree that sexual abuse/incest can happen at greater rates than what people would like to think. In my home town, there was a whole large family that were reputedly the products of incest. I had a friend in high school that had been sexually abused by both her mother and uncle. It definitely happens.

I suspect OP is a troll not because of the content of her post, but because of the tone, and pattern of responses in this thread. OP wants to pretend she's hemming and hawing over the decision when really I think she likes the attention this thread has gotten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally think this is a troll. Early on she said she'd call CPS, then she got wishy washy, in order to generate more pages of responses. I haven't read everything, but first got a whiff of troll when she said that others haven't noticed anything unusual, and then said well actually other people have noticed. Something feels off about OP.

I dont think the wishy washy means troll, unfortunately. I wish this were a troll. Unfortunately people will grasp at whatever they can to avoid hard things or facing things. My mil and sil don't speak because when sil came to her and told her she was molested by her mom's brother, mil did not believe her. SIL had signs of sexual abuse and MIL used those very signs to say she couldn't trust her and therefore didn't believe her. She thought sil just needed more religion to behave better. It was a screwed up situation but how these things often go.

Adults dont want to face what is happening and they will grasp at anything to avoid it.

I wish this were a troll because I don't want it to be true. Statistically, we know these kids are out there. Most likely it is true. OP just wants to put her head in the sand and not confront it.

PP here. I agree that sexual abuse/incest can happen at greater rates than what people would like to think. In my home town, there was a whole large family that were reputedly the products of incest. I had a friend in high school that had been sexually abused by both her mother and uncle. It definitely happens.

I suspect OP is a troll not because of the content of her post, but because of the tone, and pattern of responses in this thread. OP wants to pretend she's hemming and hawing over the decision when really I think she likes the attention this thread has gotten.

PP I'm starting to believe you're right. Which gives me hope because it would mean this isn't really happening (in this case).

[Anonymous]

Spend a year as a social worker. You will 100% believe OP. I've seen so, so, so much worse. From all kinds of families. The stuff of nightmares.

Kids who are victims of abuse carry those wounds forever.

One of the saddest things I saw was that kids don't know any different because they are often isolated by their family/the perpetrator. They will keep loving that family because they don't realize people who love you don't abuse you. And they are convinced they are unlovable by anyone else. It is heartbreaking and tragic. And often what you see and hear about is only the tiny tip of the iceberg of horror that they are living.

I'm really sorry to all the PPs who were victims. I've been thinking about all of you and hoping you get the help you deserve.

[Anonymous]

I think most of us know that this girl is 100% real in just about every neighborhood. But OP isn’t real, or she would have already done the right thing.
Shame on the troll!

[Anonymous]

I am crying reading this thread. This happened to me. My cousin was 3 years older than me and I was his target for years until he went to college. I’m almost 50 now. It still hurts. I hope the op will make the call.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am crying reading this thread. This happened to me. My cousin was 3 years older than me and I was his target for years until he went to college. I’m almost 50 now. It still hurts. I hope the op will make the call.

I am so sorry about what he did.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I totally think this is a troll. Early on she said she'd call CPS, then she got wishy washy, in order to generate more pages of responses. I haven't read everything, but first got a whiff of troll when she said that others haven't noticed anything unusual, and then said well actually other people have noticed. Something feels off about OP.

I dont think the wishy washy means troll, unfortunately. I wish this were a troll. Unfortunately people will grasp at whatever they can to avoid hard things or facing things. My mil and sil don't speak because when sil came to her and told her she was molested by her mom's brother, mil did not believe her. SIL had signs of sexual abuse and MIL used those very signs to say she couldn't trust her and therefore didn't believe her. She thought sil just needed more religion to behave better. It was a screwed up situation but how these things often go.

Adults dont want to face what is happening and they will grasp at anything to avoid it.

I wish this were a troll because I don't want it to be true. Statistically, we know these kids are out there. Most likely it is true. OP just wants to put her head in the sand and not confront it.

PP here. I agree that sexual abuse/incest can happen at greater rates than what people would like to think. In my home town, there was a whole large family that were reputedly the products of incest. I had a friend in high school that had been sexually abused by both her mother and uncle. It definitely happens.

I suspect OP is a troll not because of the content of her post, but because of the tone, and pattern of responses in this thread. OP wants to pretend she's hemming and hawing over the decision when really I think she likes the attention this thread has gotten.

Plus 1,000

[Anonymous]

Speculation but based on the details of the posts and hesitancy for action I think OP is the victim, and she is either trying to reconcile the past or this is going on now and she's reaching out for help. To help yourself or someone you care about:

The National Sexual Assault Hotline is available 24/7: Telephone: 800.656.HOPE (4673) Online chat: online.rainn.org Español: rainn.org/es

[Anonymous]

The reason I've had trouble believing OP from the beginning is not that abuse does not happen. However, it usually happens behind closed doors. I find it unlikely that abusers are as blatant and obvious as OP made this seem. To hear her tell it, brother is practically fondling the sister at the local swimming pool. Abusers tend to isolate their victims and try to maintain normalcy for the sake of public appearances, but apparently this family goes on vacation with OP's family and, according to OP, there were other friends of the family who witnessed all this inappropriate behavior. This is where the story does not seem true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reason I've had trouble believing OP from the beginning is not that abuse does not happen. However, it usually happens behind closed doors. I find it unlikely that abusers are as blatant and obvious as OP made this seem. To hear her tell it, brother is practically fondling the sister at the local swimming pool. Abusers tend to isolate their victims and try to maintain normalcy for the sake of public appearances, but apparently this family goes on vacation with OP's family and, according to OP, there were other friends of the family who witnessed all this inappropriate behavior. This is where the story does not seem true.

This is definitely true of adult abusers, but may not be the case when children are the abusers. Particularly if the child does not see anything wrong with it. I remember, back when I was 12 or so (40+ years ago), I had a friend (a year or so younger than me) who's younger sister (4 or 5) would hang out with us. Bottom line is he told how he would put in in her (or near her). The context was we were in the woods and peeing....and sister was trying to pee with us. (FWIW, family was totally f****ed up. His mom later (when I was 13 and her H was deployed) seduced me. So, it is possible he does not realize it is wrong.

[Anonymous]

If he is doing this in front of others, then I'm afraid it only gets worse when they are alone at night behind close doors with the lights out and underneath the blankets.

My brother was aggressive when he was younger and would always want to wrestle, but by this age he was completely hands off. No one bad to tell him. You just know intuitivel6, it is inappropriate with a girl. This was pure wrestling, no kissing, hugging etc.

[Anonymous]

social worker here. call CPS. They are there to investigate and offer resources if need be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The reason I've had trouble believing OP from the beginning is not that abuse does not happen. However, it usually happens behind closed doors. I find it unlikely that abusers are as blatant and obvious as OP made this seem. To hear her tell it, brother is practically fondling the sister at the local swimming pool. Abusers tend to isolate their victims and try to maintain normalcy for the sake of public appearances, but apparently this family goes on vacation with OP's family and, according to OP, there were other friends of the family who witnessed all this inappropriate behavior. This is where the story does not seem true.

This is definitely true of adult abusers, but may not be the case when children are the abusers. Particularly if the child does not see anything wrong with it. I remember, back when I was 12 or so (40+ years ago), I had a friend (a year or so younger than me) who's younger sister (4 or 5) would hang out with us. Bottom line is he told how he would put in in her (or near her). The context was we were in the woods and peeing....and sister was trying to pee with us. (FWIW, family was totally f****ed up. His mom later (when I was 13 and her H was deployed) seduced me. So, it is possible he does not realize it is wrong.

Even if what he told you is the truth, he told a peer, not an adult, and he wasn't doing it in public or in front of other people. That actually supports my point. That family does sound awful; hope the kids somehow managed to be ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This may be child abuse (child on child abuse) please let DCF know

If OP is very close to the mom, she should talk to the mom first.