Wife takes care of the 'other woman', ends her DH's affair and his marriage in one evening

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

These things are consolations and secondary. For most women, their marriage is the single most life-determining thing there is, and the original nuclear family they created and gave birth to is not replaceable like a new job or career bump. It is their soul.

NP. Huh? What are you talking about? Your marriage is life-determining? Not a single one of my friends thinks of their marriage this way. A marriage and a family are a lot of work. Having friends and other life affirming outlets outside of the marriage and family is so important, that’s your lifeline in times of stress.

+1.

I don't know a single woman who considers her marriage to be the most important thing. Many women try to hang on to uninterested spouses because they think the marriage is better for the children.

But in this case, there are no children involved. I am just baffled, and most women in my circle would be too. You have family, you have friends, why takeaway your life for someone. who does not care about you? It's just incomprehensible.

[Anonymous]

For me it would be the emotional equivalent to a man of losing his life savings. Men jumped out of windows when the stock market crashed even though it didn’t bring the money back. What she did is similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

These things are consolations and secondary. For most women, their marriage is the single most life-determining thing there is, and the original nuclear family they created and gave birth to is not replaceable like a new job or career bump. It is their soul.

NP. Huh? What are you talking about? Your marriage is life-determining? Not a single one of my friends thinks of their marriage this way. A marriage and a family are a lot of work. Having friends and other life affirming outlets outside of the marriage and family is so important, that’s your lifeline in times of stress.

+1.

I don't know a single woman who considers her marriage to be the most important thing. Many women try to hang on to uninterested spouses because they think the marriage is better for the children.

But in this case, there are no children involved. I am just baffled, and most women in my circle would be too. You have family, you have friends, why takeaway your life for someone. who does not care about you? It's just incomprehensible.

She got pissed off that she could not control him. Honestly that tells you everything you need to know about why the marriage was unbearable. If you need to control another person and you don’t have your center in yourself you’re just going to end up devouring each other, whether that’s psychologically or in this case literally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For me it would be the emotional equivalent to a man of losing his life savings. Men jumped out of windows when the stock market crashed even though it didn’t bring the money back. What she did is similar.

Those men are fools, just like she is. But they are a hundred times better than her because they did not take others with them.

And when men want to take someone in murder suicides, they take they usually take the spouse not the other man. Her husband was not a purse or dollar that was stolen from her. He was a person who made the decision over and over to lie to her, manipulate her, and leave her. Killing him would have been stupid, but leting him live and killing the other woman instead is beyond ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me it would be the emotional equivalent to a man of losing his life savings. Men jumped out of windows when the stock market crashed even though it didn’t bring the money back. What she did is similar.

Those men are fools, just like she is. But they are a hundred times better than her because they did not take others with them.

And when men want to take someone in murder suicides, they take they usually take the spouse not the other man. Her husband was not a purse or dollar that was stolen from her. He was a person who made the decision over and over to lie to her, manipulate her, and leave her. Killing him would have been stupid, but leting him live and killing the other woman instead is beyond ridiculous.

Ummm. No. Men will take the other man's life quite frequently. They will do it themselves or hire a hit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

How are you now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

Ugh, I am so, so sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

How are you now?

Posting here repeatedly and blaming the Meredith. Her DH posts all the time to show remorse. DCUM is their therapist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

Ugh, I am so, so sorry.

Yes, and Jennair didn't have a job or support in a new town.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

Yes. All that can be true AND so can be the concept that getting involved in an ongoing sexual relationship with someone else's husband or wife invites psychosis and danger.

You are absolutely right. It's just that the murderous act stands out to me more than anything else.

I am someone who will never cheat or date an involved man. But I cannot understand how one goes from being a victim of cheating to a murderer. It's so senseless. So it's harder for me to focus on that smaller yet obvious lesson.

I didn’t either. Until I was 100% completely blindsided finding out about a multi-year affair two decades into marriage with kids. Great marriage/sex life/happy family. I went to a very dark place. I practically had a nervous breakdown and reality was distorted. Nobody in our circle ever could have predicted this. It really shocked so many. I was not sleeping or eating. I couldn’t. That does a number on your mental health.

I had my own income, a great family and was strong mentally so I can see if somebody had past trauma or was slightly unstable prior or had underlying mental health issues—how in that incredible loony fog they could commit a crime of passion. Insomnia over an extended period of time does a number on your sense of reality.

I have always had a great fear of prison. I watched far too many prison documentaries. For a few weeks the thought of prison and what it would do to my kids was the only thing stopping me. I scared myself. It really is one of those- unless you lived it (long happy marriage with unconditional trust) you could never understand what it’s really like. It’s nothing like I imagined or in the movies.

I know I would never murder, but I can see why it is common in these situations.

How are you now?

Posting here repeatedly and blaming the Meredith. Her DH posts all the time to show remorse. DCUM is their therapist.

Mark and Meredith loaded the gun. Jennair pulled the trigger. No Mark tried to write a deflection book. In truth they were never planning to divorce, and since he was a man child most of the responsibilities fell to her. He called that controlling, most would call that responsible. If she wanted the bills to be paid she would need to pay them. She left him alive because she knew he would struggle. That he is. While I think he is remorseful, a narcissist is a survivor. However, he still doesn't have a job. He's over 50 and doesn't have a good retirement either. Even with a life insurance payout that will run out at some point. Jennair had attachment issues with him, but he finally admitted she was never diagnosed with any mental illness. Only depression, and PTSD caused by those two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ you need to read more critically. No one is justifying murder. Lots of people are recognizing that the wife was abused (gaslit, etc) and had a breakdown as a result, and was obviously (and understandably) not stable at the end.

And that if you want to greatly reduce your chances of a crazy person going after you or your family, don’t f@“”ck and maintain a relationship with somebody that’s married. Pretty simple.

We have different takes on this. For me the lesson is that your marriage should not be the only thing that you have going for you. You need close friends and family. You need to build a world outside your marriage. You cannot own a human being. If someone does not want to be married to you move on. She is dead and buried. And he is living his life, putting his ugly face out there, using her name to seek attention.

These things are consolations and secondary. For most women, their marriage is the single most life-determining thing there is, and the original nuclear family they created and gave birth to is not replaceable like a new job or career bump. It is their soul.

They didn't have kids, but that's another factor. It destroys the kids lives which amazes me that anyone would throw away their spouse and children for AP. Goes back to a lot of mental illness in our society.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP has weird eyebrows.

Agreed. Color me shamelessly shallow, but that was my first thought. She had puffy, heavy eye lids. Cute in a country simple way.

Looks mean nothing here. M was "cute" on the outside, but ugly on the inside which really counts in life. Meredith had good jobs, but too bad she couldn't get her personal life in order. At the end of the day all three sunk very low, and NONE of this should have happened.