Been married for 24 years. Love my husband but I am going to come out and say it...I am bored. I respect him immensely, he is a highly accomplished professional, we live in an amazing home, have a second beach house, our kids attend a top private school, we take amazing trips, you get the picture. I quit working years ago to raise our kids which i do not regret. I got married young and that could be a big part of why i am feeling this way. I am not happy about it because I don't want to do something stupid. My husband is a good loyal man, but boring ugh..yes he is. Works a lot too.
Fast forward= went to our beach house this past weekend to have some work done. The architect who is doing the job was there (met for the first time) and to say there were sparks is an understatement. It was actually a little scary. I don't know that I have ever felt that electrifying feeling EVER. No nothing happened but we worked together a few hours and it was very obvious there was a strong mutual attraction. He is a good 10 years younger than me (but I look very young for my age). Now, I am supposed to go back this Sat. to work with him all day. My husband is flying to the Orient for two weeks and leaving it in my hands. I am honestly petrified of something happening. The physicality of the situation was unlike anything I have ever experienced and I am not going to lie...if he had tried to kiss me i would not have stopped him. Please help me!! Do I go? Do I not go? Do I fire him and hire someone else? Between my feelings of wanting to be with someone else (again kind of out of boredom) the insane attraction to this gorgeous man (unmarried) and my own total lack of self control at this point in my life...I am a little nervous. Please do not judge me. I am putting myself out there beucuse I want genuine good advice. |
I'm sure you're not the first woman who's 'house he's been working on' had created this scenario. You're just the typical bored housewife that he pumps, than dumps. Don't fall for it. |
Be an adult, get some self control, and stop acting like a teenager.
He sees $$$$ signs with you...thats it. |
You are an adult. Act like an adult. If you feel like you are unable to control yourself around this man, you should not be around this man. It sounds like you are having a midlife crisis of sorts. A therapist can help you sort this out, or you could just pull yourself together and not act on your sexual attraction to a stranger. Also, "the Orient"? Really? It's 2013 and this is not a Victorian romance novel. |
I hear you. Just resist at all costs. |
Compare the life you have now, with your husband and the life you'd have as a single, divorced woman. The architect will move on and you'll be alone. Hopefully the husband wins. |
You don't love your husband. If you did you would not even entertain the thought of cheating on him because you're bored.
If you do cheat, I hope your husband finds out and puts your ass out on the curb with nothing but a paper bag full of clothes. |
bwahaha, I was thinking the real thing. Me thinks OP is taking a stab at soft core novel writing. LOL |
Do you see yourself as someone with integrity or character? A person who cheats is a person who lacks integrity and has little character. having an affair involves lying, cheating, deceit and betrayal. It can mean giving STDs to an innocent spouse. It means being willing to emotionally hurt and cause pain to the person you made a marriage commitment too and often also impacts the mental health of your children when they get caught up in a bitter pain filled divorce and custody. No one thinks they will get caught but many do.
Would you tell your children that lying, cheating, deceiving and hurting others is how to behave? Is that how you want others to see you? Are you okay with being someone who has no integrity? |
Judging you on using the term orient because it makes you seem out of touch. Otherwise yes it human and yea you should resist like the PPs said. This is so textbook it's not even funny. |
Bring one of your kids or a friend to all of your meetings. |
Good idea |
Get a hobby. You live a charmed life that most people would kill for. You would be an absolute fool to jeopardize it. |
Brilliant! |
This is NOT a tough situation. You're an adult. You have self control. If you cheat on your husband, you're scum. Being bored is not an excuse. You have an amazing life that many people only dream of, and you'd rather throw it all away on a fling than actually put in a bit of work to revive your relationship with your husband? He has done nothing wrong here, I might add. Disgusting, OP. |