Who is right? Son accidentally took item - disagreement results

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I actually imagined the conversation went like this ("CB" = crazy bitch"):

CB: "Hi, it looks like your son accidentally grabbed my son's swimsuit. We're packing for a trip to the Jersey Shore in the morning. Is there any way we can get it back tonight?"
OP: "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Let me drive it to you."
CB: "That would be great, my address is ---"
OP: "Oh. That's 50 minutes away! My husband is out of town, I have a sleeping baby, and I need to put my other kid to bed. Sorry."
CB: "Oh ok. Can I meet you at address X instead? It's about half as far for you, but I'm in the middle of packing, so I can't get there until 10:00."
OP: "Um...let me check with DCUM and get back to you."

Who is the crazy bitch in this scenario?

You, PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually imagined the conversation went like this ("CB" = crazy bitch"):

CB: "Hi, it looks like your son accidentally grabbed my son's swimsuit. We're packing for a trip to the Jersey Shore in the morning. Is there any way we can get it back tonight?"
OP: "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. Let me drive it to you."
CB: "That would be great, my address is ---"
OP: "Oh. That's 50 minutes away! My husband is out of town, I have a sleeping baby, and I need to put my other kid to bed. Sorry."
CB: "Oh ok. Can I meet you at address X instead? It's about half as far for you, but I'm in the middle of packing, so I can't get there until 10:00."
OP: "Um...let me check with DCUM and get back to you."

Who is the crazy bitch in this scenario?

You, PP.

+1. PP, when she thought it was okay to characterize sleeping baby mom as a "crazy bitch."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She was inconvenienced because of your son's fault. That is the fact. It does not matter if you think that her inconvenience was small. That is your opinion.

You are feeling inconvenienced because you are supposed to fix your son's fault. That was your moral obligation. But you did not allow yourself to be inconvenienced to fix your son's fault. That is your selfishness and entitlement. You are not a good role model to your children in doing the right thing. Sorry, but I am not on your side. Even though I have sympathy for your situation.

Sometime doing the right thing is not easy, but not doing the right thing is wrong.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Can't believe most of the posters are putting the obligation on the wronged party and NOT the OP. Unbelievable.

This. You should have a neighbor of friend you can call to sit with your children at your house so you can leave the house for an hour or two in a situation like this. Did you even try to find someone? You could have just put the kids in the car and let them fall asleep. And if they didn't fall asleep, the next day is a Saturday, they could have slept in to make up for it. You could have offered to get up super early today to drive it back in the AM. Did you offer that? You could have offered to fed ex it overnight to wherever they are staying. Did you offer that? Did you really offer anything?

Get labels for your child, FOR EVERYTHING, like off of mabels labels or something, to prevent this from happening again. You don't know what the deal is with this family, maybe this is the kid's ultimate favorite bathing suit of all time, and they are all sold out that size, who knows. I think it kind of sucks to ask you to drive it a far distance and sure I would be annoyed at both the bathing suit mom AND my kid who should have been old enough to make sure he brought home the correct suit. But that's life.

"a situation like this"? I have people I can count on to help my kids if we need to take one to the hospital, if someone's flight was rescheduled and comes in late, if I'm called in to work etc. But to return a bathing suit? I would be embarrassed to ask for someone to help in "a situation like this" (and no doubt they would say hell no, tell the lady you'll get it to her in the morning or next week).

How do you live? We can't function as a society with such rigid expectation over every trifling thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP with only one swimsuit per kid. If it happened to me, I would be pissed off that OP didn't try to return in the same day after offering to do so.

It cost a lot more to buy at the beach, which will take away some money from the travel. We have limited budget and time to make the travel.

I would definitely blacklisted the parent. She spoiled the beginning of the vacation. I'll reminded of her antics everytime I see swimsuit that I have to buy (pricey low quality swimsuit) to replace it.

What a sad way to live. These things must really pile up on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Important takeaways from this thread:

Have more than one swimsuit for your kid

Don't answer texts from school moms you don't know after 8 pm. No good can come.

Uber can take your misbegotten swimsuit to its rightful owner if you decline to drag your kids out of bed for a midnight ride of 2 hours or so

there are ZERO places to buying a bathing suit at the Jersey shore

Somewhere in this tri state area, schools are already out!

Don't send your freakishly large kid to a school 40 minutes from your house.

[Anonymous]

Why on earth does this kid just have ONE bathing suit?! He's heading to the beach!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm the PP with only one swimsuit per kid. If it happened to me, I would be pissed off that OP didn't try to return in the same day after offering to do so.

It cost a lot more to buy at the beach, which will take away some money from the travel. We have limited budget and time to make the travel.

I would definitely blacklisted the parent. She spoiled the beginning of the vacation. I'll reminded of her antics everytime I see swimsuit that I have to buy (pricey low quality swimsuit) to replace it.

What a sad way to live. These things must really pile up on you.

It's crazy swimsuit lady! She has a pretty distinctive use of English.

[Anonymous]

Most important takeaway from this thread ------

******So many moms desperate to be liked can be suckered into just about anything! **************

Driving over to a kids house an hour away at 10pm to return a bathing suit. Zero common sense to whoever would do this. I wouldn't even do that for an adult much less a kid that I will see on Monday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did she know your son was the one who took the bathing suit? This story is fishy!

It does but people notice or maybe someone took pictures and the host gave out her information. But, why drive home knowing you live that far before getting the suit.

???

I've noticed in pool parties when other kids have the same suits as my kids, it's not very often but happens. The mom probably noticed that the other kid had the exact same trunks as her son.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids only have one swimming suit each. We washed and air dried after each usage.

Why ?

Why would anyone have one suit? What is your HHI?

Not PP but we live on a very low budget, get a lot of hand-me-downs from neighbors and my younger kids wear whatever has not been worn out by the older kids. We usually only have one suit per kid. (Why is the woman able to take a trip to the beach if the price of one bathing suit is going to make such a difference to her budget? We haven't been on a vacation in years....)

If someone took my kid's suit at a party, I would never dream of asking them to put the baby in the car and drive an hour to return it. My kid would swim in briefs before I'd make such a ridiculous request. The world doe not revolve around us -- or around the woman going to the shore without a bathing suit. Talk about entitled. Please drop everything and return a bathing suit? I'd be embarrassed to ask that of someone.

[Anonymous]

How did the mom get your cell if you never met before? I smell one of our prolific fiction writing trolls.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:OP, why do you care what DCUM thinks?

Your child took someone's swimsuit, and you did not return it to the other person. Both these acts (your son taking something, and you not returning it in time) has already happened. Why do you need DCUM to approve or disapprove? We do not know you. The other person knows you somewhat, and she does not have a good impression of you. Worry about her impression because she knows you IRL.

I think once the crazy lady's request starts getting out there, she's going to be the one who has to worry what people think of her.

Over a bathing suit.

She sounds self-absorbed. There will be more stories, after this one, I imagine.

How can she be self-absorbed, when it wasn't her suit that was taken by mistake? I don't think there's anything crazy about asking for a stolen by accident item to be returned immediately. OP doesn't want to return it immediately, which means she should keep closer tabs on her child who takes other people's things, if she doesn't want to be doing this for the next 10 years.

Again the word stolen. The kid is 6/7 . Really you need to let it go and just enjoy your vacation.

Again- you don't read very well. Try it again. Sound it out.

The word stolen, by definition, requires intent. Grabbing the wrong swim suit by mistake is not stealing.

Seriously. I'm on the Jersey shore right now and I'm pretty sure I could WALK to the Target here in 15 minutes.

?

The jersey shore isn't a town, people. I assure you that you won't find a Target or a kid's swim trunks for under $40 in Stone Harbor or Avalon. And you won't pass a target on the way there. Those beach towns don't have a boardwalk---just a little Main Street with upscale shops. And the family probably planned to leave at 6am and can't hit a local target on their way out of town.

You get to the Jersey shore by driving up 95 for hours. A big box store is not hard to find and don't most people stop for stuff along the way when going on a driving vacation? Come on. You can't possibly be arguing that it is impossible to replace a Target bathing suit while driving through the mid-Atlantic States.

It is an inconvience and the whole finding a target, pulling off, finding and buying a suit will probably take 50 minutes. Why should the other mom be subjected to this inconvience but not OP? OP is clearly outsourcing her childcare (see: she didn't go to party or maybe this wouldn't have happened) so of COURSE she thinks she shouldn't have to drive anywhere.

Because that is life with kids. Her kid went to a pool party, took off his suit, didn't immediately wrap it in a towel and put it in his bag, another kid had the same suit in a different size, the suits got switched. So, on the way to the beach she stops and picks up a new one along with some extra sunscreen. While they are stopped they get some lunch. No one stresses about it and everyone has a lovely weekend.

Returning things your child accidentally takes because you choose not to be responsible for your own child and your child doesn't know how to read sizes is ALSO a part of parenting.

As is teaching them to keep things in perspective, something your parents didn't do. People need to roll with the punches in life. For someone whose vacation train derails because of a minor thing like misplacing a swim suit, no doubt multiple other things go wrong on a daily basis.

What if OP misplaces her her toothbrush or deodorant or razor? Will she stay inside the hotel or does she have the wherewithal to replace them? It's not like she's taking a trip to the Amazon jungle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did the mom get your cell if you never met before? I smell one of our prolific fiction writing trolls.

Our directory has phone numbers in it. Doesn't yours?

[Anonymous]

Hey CBSM (Crazy Bathing Suit Mom) a few questions:

1. Did you write your son's name in the swim trunks? That's pretty standard for a one who has been on a swim team or attended a summer camp?

2. Did you reach out to any friends of your son to see if you could borrow a suit from one of them for a couple of days?

3. Why didn't you just stop at Target on the way home from the pool and saved yourself the time and aggravation? There were pretty good odds the other Mom didn't live anywhere near you.

;. Why are you incapable of chalking it up to shit happens sometimes that results in varying degrees of cost and inconvenience and then get on with your life and enjoy your time at the beach? We're not talking about a backpack with a retainer, medication or prescription eyewear. We're talking about a $10 swimsuit that you apparenyly think should have been FedExed for Saturday delivery or delivered by Uber.

5. Why is cyberbullying okay with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't think driving less than an hour somewhere with 2 kids + back is a big deal. Especially to fix my kid's mistake. Who are you princesses and how do you function in daily life?

The other mom was out of line for expecting OP to drive so far with a bathing suit but to be fair, OP did offer first and then it became awkward, like: "I would have driven the suit over but dang, not *that* far...).

Yes, that's right. The appropriate thing for OP to have said was, "I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was that far. I have a sleeping baby and I can't drive there at 10. Give me a call when you are free. Have a nice vacation."

But by far the appropriate missing response was "Oh, don't worry about it, we'll manage" on the part of the nutty other mother. What a kook.