What would you really like to tell your spouse or partner but can't or won't?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That how you always bring the cost of something or money into every single conversation with friends and it's embarrassing. You're that guy who always talks about money.

That I wish I could tell your friends how low your sex drive is. Considering how often you say crude remarks and talk about sex they would be shocked. Or maybe they wouldn't.

Typical, when they talk a lot about money and sex you know they have problems with both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Typo, I wish he WASN'T uncircumsised

LOL, funny. Mine is that I wish he wasn't circumcised.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typo, I wish he WASN'T uncircumsised

LOL, funny. Mine is that I wish he wasn't circumcised.

Poor guys. They don't usually have much of a choice in that!

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:That DH's high school friend/ex short term gf is nice and all but that I think her twice yearly 'pleasant emails' are, in part, to keep her foot in the door in case I screw up or die or whatever and it's just kind of obvious. That I remember him telling me that her husband sucks in bed and has a lot of hang ups and, well, he doesn't so it's like she's a vulture circling...

Wow. That's exactly what she's doing. Not being sarcastic.

Seriously. The fact that he knows too-intimate details like the husband's performance in bed is not good

If she is actually a threat to your marriage maybe you should address this. With her! can you politely and discretely intimidate the hell out of her?

Yes - I'm thinking along the lines of 'Dearest Suzy, thank you so much for contacting my husband with cute short little notes every fucking goddamned day.
Is this because your husband is not available for some reason? You know I'm here to talk if you need' Hugs.'

I mean my husband brought my coffee in bed 3x this week. I can't think of what to say to him except thanks.

No no, you need to have a talk with dh. Shouldn't have gone on this long. I wouldn't say any of that, just send her a email you're deleting that email account. You'll send her the new one. Of course never do and never answer any she ends up sending. She'll go away. Make sure dh doesn't respond to her in any way. She'll get the hint.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That although you think I am the greatest husband, I have had a couple of affairs and it has no effect on my love for you. I actually feel closer to you when I can get my needs met elsewhere and it takes the pressure off the sexual side of our marriage. If you would let me have an affair partner, I would worship you and be the most devoted husband ever.

Truly sick especially when one or both of you end up with a deadly std.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Not something to be hurtful, but would like to get off your chest but won't say out of fear of scorn or ridicule or rejection. Or maybe because after saying it things would never be the same.

. I would like to tell my husband to get a penile implant; his penis looks like a little boy, cannot get/keep erection and there has been no sex at my house since June 2007, at least, I haven't had any.

Be happy, most women envy you. You're free!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That your general passivity in life and your inability to initiate any meaningful conversation, or sex, for the last 8 years of our marriage has had the effect of me falling out of love with you, and if it weren't for our awesome young kids and generally fun family life, I would have bailed a long time ago. Even though I am sure you are not having an affair, I wouldn't even be that upset if you were because it would mean that you still have those feelings, even if they weren't directed at me. The thought of you not having any feelings like that at all is more devastating to me.

Be careful what you wish for. Had a friend that left her wonderful husband for a exciting kind of guy. Within a year she was calling me saying she made a mistake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Channeling my best Taylor Swift here: We are never, ever, ever getting back together. Throughout our trial separation you've been a total narcissistic prick (just like the marriage). I'm being nice now only to get a fair settlement agreement so you won't screw me over when I file. Oh, and you have a small penis. Trust me, darling - ALL my girlfriends know. And you were not my best ever either - not even in the top five. So good luck in the dating scene. You'll do ok if you stand on your wallet - at least until they find out I bought more than half of everything you own. Your last girlfriend was trashy, by the way. I'll take the kids if you bring a skank like that around again. Enjoy your freedom without my money!

Hahaha, like the part about standing on the wallet. He sounds like a real winner you put up with for a long time.

[Anonymous]

That I fell in love with a Jewish guy (AA woman) and would leave in a heartbeat if I thought it was reciprocal.

[Anonymous]

I'm bisexual and I want an open marriage. I honestly worry that it would bring up a threesome question and I don't mind the idea of him sleeping with other people as long as there are boundaries so it doesn't take away from our relationship. But I don't want to WATCH him have sex with or pleasure someone else. When you are with me I want all the attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm bisexual and I want an open marriage. I honestly worry that it would bring up a threesome question and I don't mind the idea of him sleeping with other people as long as there are boundaries so it doesn't take away from our relationship. But I don't want to WATCH him have sex with or pleasure someone else. When you are with me I want all the attention.

I would talk about it. As long as there are mutually agreed upon rules that are respected, why not?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm bisexual and I want an open marriage. I honestly worry that it would bring up a threesome question and I don't mind the idea of him sleeping with other people as long as there are boundaries so it doesn't take away from our relationship. But I don't want to WATCH him have sex with or pleasure someone else. When you are with me I want all the attention.

I would talk about it. As long as there are mutually agreed upon rules that are respected, why not?

We have both had affairs that were not pre approved. Since we moved beyond it I realized that it wasn't the affair but the way I was treated during it. The attention that I was losing to the sneaking around, the relationship they had not the sex. I don't know how he feels but I kind of had a revenge affair and he was really upset by it and I worry that he won't be into it and he won't trust me knowing I want to do it. We are really happy now and I don't want to fuck it up.

As for being bi, I recently told my husband that the first person I had sex with was actually a woman and you would have thought that the craziest most exciting thing ever had happened, so many questions with such a big smile on his face! I don't want to have to answer questions like that all the time.

Good reasons or am I just being a chicken?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I have lied about my number of sexual partners for almost 20 years. Told the lie once and never found a way to tell the truth. And he is totally one that will be hurt by the dishonesty even 20 years later. Wish that I was mature enough to go with the "none of your business" line at the time.

I am convinced that when I am old and forgetful that I will let it slip.

What did you tell him vs. the true number?

Told him 2, real number is 7.

Um, you're wasting a whole lot of angst over 5 partners?

Goes to honesty. My DW told me two then a few years later let slip that there was a third. Why would she have lied about him to begin with? I have to assume that there were more than that.

Correct answer. It's not the number, it's the dishonesty surrounding the number. Why lie unless there was a reason? What else has she felt a reason to lie about?

Why lie? Maybe her husband was some ridiculous prude who would feel like she was a slut or he was less of a man based on her number. The argument could be made that in that case she shouldn't have married him, but there is an answer to the question why lie.

Well, yeah. But the point remains that the issue is not that she had 5 more partners, it's that she specifically lied about it. If I'm her DH I'm left wondering what else she lied about.

Number poster here. Yes, to it being about honesty and yes to having a reason (or so I thought to lie). I started having sex WAY too young (13), and had 4 partners in a year before I wised up and decided that I wasn't ready. Then I changed my life and started hanging out with a different crowd. Then I waited 4 years to have sex again and started the lie about being a virgin. Guys respect refraining from sex much easier from a virgin. The next time I had sex i declared this new event as "losing my virginity" while in a 4 year relationship. When that ended I had a random hookup (also embarrassing so I omitted that one) and the lie continues. My now DH was the third (or 7th) guy. Who is going to believe that I didn't have sex for 4 years....especially now after the multiple decades long lie? Not to mention what the dishonesty says about my character.

Shrug...you are a born again virgin. That's all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm bisexual and I want an open marriage. I honestly worry that it would bring up a threesome question and I don't mind the idea of him sleeping with other people as long as there are boundaries so it doesn't take away from our relationship. But I don't want to WATCH him have sex with or pleasure someone else. When you are with me I want all the attention.

I would talk about it. As long as there are mutually agreed upon rules that are respected, why not?

We have both had affairs that were not pre approved. Since we moved beyond it I realized that it wasn't the affair but the way I was treated during it. The attention that I was losing to the sneaking around, the relationship they had not the sex. I don't know how he feels but I kind of had a revenge affair and he was really upset by it and I worry that he won't be into it and he won't trust me knowing I want to do it. We are really happy now and I don't want to fuck it up.

As for being bi, I recently told my husband that the first person I had sex with was actually a woman and you would have thought that the craziest most exciting thing ever had happened, so many questions with such a big smile on his face! I don't want to have to answer questions like that all the time.

Good reasons or am I just being a chicken?

Hot

[Anonymous]

+ a million on the teeth brushing thing. Sorry but if you want me to be REALLY into sex, you need to brush your teeth first.