Most young men are single - most young women are not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

My son tells me that the 'me too' movement has put social interaction on ice. Young men are afraid to ask women out because they are risking being 'me too'd', that's why they do it through apps. They are scared that women will react badly if they approach them in person. My DH asked me out several times and I turned him down several times, he was persistent, young men can't do that now.

Up through my thirties, I dealt with a lot of persistent young men. Including one who abducted and sexually assaulted me. I never thought the persistence was romantic. It always felt disrespectful of my no answer. If they don’t respect no to a date, why would I think they would respect no to sex?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am all for supporting women and encouraging them to be leaders. However, I hate what we are doing in society today, forgetting about the boys and younger men sometimes. The old white guys seem to women out in the old generation. But they are different than the young males who are struggling right now.

In my company (in a field that was formerly considered male dominant), 65% of the leadership is women. We were told specifically to promote women into these positions, and once the women are in they continue to push other women into leadership positions. It's like the good old boys network except the other direction.

Yup. Out of 5 entire offices we have, all led by women. All directors below them are women. Then about 16/20 mid managers below them are women. And then 14/22 junior managers below them are women. It's absolutely the good ol girls network. Definitely misandry at play. I applied for a mid manager position with great qualifications. Got an email stating the director would setup an interview. The interview never was scheduled by her, yet she did take the time to interview all women. This was already after pre-screening of submissions by the way, because we all had in panel interviews before we were supposed to interview with the director. How exactly can the director make an informed decision about which are the best candidates if she never even bothered to interview everyone and give everyone a fair chance?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

My son tells me that the 'me too' movement has put social interaction on ice. Young men are afraid to ask women out because they are risking being 'me too'd', that's why they do it through apps. They are scared that women will react badly if they approach them in person. My DH asked me out several times and I turned him down several times, he was persistent, young men can't do that now.

Up through my thirties, I dealt with a lot of persistent young men. Including one who abducted and sexually assaulted me. I never thought the persistence was romantic. It always felt disrespectful of my no answer. If they don’t respect no to a date, why would I think they would respect no to sex?

+1
I can't imagine marrying someone who had to harass me to accept a date with him. How pathetic for both of us.

[Anonymous]

Lol

Too many posters ITT conflate single with no sex. I'm here to tell you that's very, very wrong.

My best friend is 6'5" and a chief surgeon in a major city. He actually *chooses* to be single, because that way he can sleep with many women with no strings attached. He is already divorced from one marriage and never wants to be married again. I bet he's easily slept with over 500+ women. That's not even an exaggeration.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

My son tells me that the 'me too' movement has put social interaction on ice. Young men are afraid to ask women out because they are risking being 'me too'd', that's why they do it through apps. They are scared that women will react badly if they approach them in person. My DH asked me out several times and I turned him down several times, he was persistent, young men can't do that now.

Up through my thirties, I dealt with a lot of persistent young men. Including one who abducted and sexually assaulted me. I never thought the persistence was romantic. It always felt disrespectful of my no answer. If they don’t respect no to a date, why would I think they would respect no to sex?

I'm sorry that happened to you. But of course women prefer to be pursued than to be the one pursuing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol

Too many posters ITT conflate single with no sex. I'm here to tell you that's very, very wrong.

My best friend is 6'5" and a chief surgeon in a major city. He actually *chooses* to be single, because that way he can sleep with many women with no strings attached. He is already divorced from one marriage and never wants to be married again. I bet he's easily slept with over 500+ women. That's not even an exaggeration.

The article also addresses men and women who have not had sex in the past year.

So not your friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

My son tells me that the 'me too' movement has put social interaction on ice. Young men are afraid to ask women out because they are risking being 'me too'd', that's why they do it through apps. They are scared that women will react badly if they approach them in person. My DH asked me out several times and I turned him down several times, he was persistent, young men can't do that now.

Up through my thirties, I dealt with a lot of persistent young men. Including one who abducted and sexually assaulted me. I never thought the persistence was romantic. It always felt disrespectful of my no answer. If they don’t respect no to a date, why would I think they would respect no to sex?

I'm sorry that happened to you. But of course women prefer to be pursued than to be the one pursuing.

Of course you speak for all three billion of us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol

Too many posters ITT conflate single with no sex. I'm here to tell you that's very, very wrong.

My best friend is 6'5" and a chief surgeon in a major city. He actually *chooses* to be single, because that way he can sleep with many women with no strings attached. He is already divorced from one marriage and never wants to be married again. I bet he's easily slept with over 500+ women. That's not even an exaggeration.

Cool! I know women who fit every descriptor you mentioned as well. No different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

Have you thought about the impact this will have on the girls who are 5 and 6 in kindergarten? Or ready to be in kindergarten at 5 and 6. We don't want our girls to have to wait on your boys, or be bullied by your older boys. My girls were ready to start K at 5, and my first grader especially is in class full of boys who turned 7 before winter break and it's just a mess. Boys starting Kindergarten later is NOT the answer, trust me.

DP. Actually, I think there's merit to the idea of some children, some boys and a few girls, starting school later, at 7 or 8. Not kindergarten, they would start in 2nd or 3rd grade. This would mean that someone, parent or older sibling, would have taught them to read and do addition and subtraction first. My boys would have benefitted from that, more maturity, before starting school.

It would be difficult though, probably prohibitively difficult.

You think? We don’t live in Sweden. This country barely gives maternity leave and doesn’t offer pre-k but you think it’s going to change its paradigm so that boys can start school at 7 or 8?

This is ridiculous for all but the UMC and up. As it stands, schools provide social services for kids. I don't think the 13 year olds carjacking around here would have benefited tremendously from an extra few year at home...

Fwiw, children in Sweden who start school at 7 are not home with their parents in the years before that. They have extended play-based preschool from 3-7 where children play, socialize, and learn to read and do simple math.

I’m the November bday pp. I started full-day school in 1st grade 2.5 months before my 7th bday. I went to half-day public pk3, pk4 & K. Pk 3 was two days per week, half days. I think pk4 and K were 5 days/week. I think that arrangement was good. This was in “flyover country” and my mom only work part-time.

[Anonymous]

Have you heard what is expected of men nowadays? My BIL who just graduated college shared with us- the rule of 6. They must have a 6" p, make 6 digits, and be at least 6 feet tall. If you don't meet all three of these girls literally turned down guys. These were kids (girls) in college.

I say this as a parent of both boys and girls, girls have been the shining star for the last few decades, it's time to reshift attention to boys merely to pull them out of this rut we've created.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you heard what is expected of men nowadays? My BIL who just graduated college shared with us- the rule of 6. They must have a 6" p, make 6 digits, and be at least 6 feet tall. If you don't meet all three of these girls literally turned down guys. These were kids (girls) in college.

I say this as a parent of both boys and girls, girls have been the shining star for the last few decades, it's time to reshift attention to boys merely to pull them out of this rut we've created.

First of all, don’t use “men” and “girls” in the same paragraph.

Second, what are you doing to do about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you heard what is expected of men nowadays? My BIL who just graduated college shared with us- the rule of 6. They must have a 6" p, make 6 digits, and be at least 6 feet tall. If you don't meet all three of these girls literally turned down guys. These were kids (girls) in college.

I say this as a parent of both boys and girls, girls have been the shining star for the last few decades, it's time to reshift attention to boys merely to pull them out of this rut we've created.

Yeah they literally will. They have every right to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you heard what is expected of men nowadays? My BIL who just graduated college shared with us- the rule of 6. They must have a 6" p, make 6 digits, and be at least 6 feet tall. If you don't meet all three of these girls literally turned down guys. These were kids (girls) in college.

I say this as a parent of both boys and girls, girls have been the shining star for the last few decades, it's time to reshift attention to boys merely to pull them out of this rut we've created.

I'm sure some women have these expectations. But there are millions of shorter, poorer and less endowed men getting laid.

I had a friend who used to complain bitterly about not being rich enough to "get girls". He devoted his entire life to becoming rich. And he did. It hasn't helped him. BECAUSE HE'S STILL A BITTER ASSH-LE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol

Too many posters ITT conflate single with no sex. I'm here to tell you that's very, very wrong.

My best friend is 6'5" and a chief surgeon in a major city. He actually *chooses* to be single, because that way he can sleep with many women with no strings attached. He is already divorced from one marriage and never wants to be married again. I bet he's easily slept with over 500+ women. That's not even an exaggeration.

Yeah, you've spammed us with this story all iver the boards for a Kong time. It is not indicative if the average male experience. Surprise! Tall, hot, high value man makes out like a bandit!

We're talking about what to do with the rest...

[Anonymous]

30M here and I'll give my perspective, I don't think there's one single cause but a huge one is the prevalence of dating apps. A lot of these articles ignore how dating apps have risen to become the dominant way that singles are meeting these days, and they are extremely unfavorable to men who are not in the top 5-10% looks bracket. I never see this mentioned in any of the published commentary on this topic but it's intensely talked about on various internet forums.

I don't believe the main issue is education or income, as I know plenty of men who are above average in this area and they still struggle immensely to meet women because they aren't particularly good looking (not ugly, just not tall/hot/ripped) and they have zero outlets to meet women in person, so they go on Tinder or Hinge and get ignored... as in can't even get a single date. These are guys in their 20's/early 30's who have advanced degrees making 200-300k.

On dating apps a small cohort of good looking men are monopolizing access to women, IMO the problem lies in how they force you to evaluate a partner on looks and nothing more. With men, this isn't much of a problem because men already prioritized looks before dating apps. With women, it is a problem because women by nature are more multi faceted in evaluating a potential partner. But when women use dating apps they are FORCED to only choose men on looks which isn't something they would normally do in person, and it turns out that when women are judging men on looks alone they tend to be much more ruthless and can only find a small % of the male population good enough. Men can find a broad range of women visually attractive, but women can only find a small percent of men visually attractive (if they know nothing about the guy).

It's now become socially unacceptable, or just too risky, to approach women in many real life situations. As a result, men are flooding to dating apps where 80-90% just can't compete.