Most young men are single - most young women are not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

[Anonymous]

I don't see how this is a problem?

Same thing is Japan. They're fine.

https://www.nippon.com/en/japan-data/h00759/

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I notice that articles like these always frame the issue as some deficiency or failing with men, whereas when a demographic trend is unfavorable for women it is usually externalized, attributed to some outside force or...blamed on men again.

We need to start being honest about how held-preferences, individual action and societal forces are combining to foment these trends.

It's easy to just resort to bludgeoning men, but I don't think it's the answer long term.

I do think the answer is with men. My dh was raised by his parents to be a full partner: work, cook, clean, love children, remember holidays. So many men just weren't. They basically think all they need to do is get a job. Showing up doesn't count anymore for men. Women do it all and men need to step up. I'm raising my sons to do better.

I have both sons and daughters and I also think schools play a role. They are geared towards girls who sit better and don't need as much activity.

Schools have more movement, moving around, and movement breaks than they did when we were in school. I think the problem is the opposite, that schools expect a lot from girls but have low expectations of boys and low requirements. And therefore low results.

Same as society.

[Anonymous]

Hmm, how can half of the dating pool be single and the other half not? Sounds more like a difference in how young men and women define single? LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am all for supporting women and encouraging them to be leaders. However, I hate what we are doing in society today, forgetting about the boys and younger men sometimes. The old white guys seem to women out in the old generation. But they are different than the young males who are struggling right now.

In my company (in a field that was formerly considered male dominant), 65% of the leadership is women. We were told specifically to promote women into these positions, and once the women are in they continue to push other women into leadership positions. It's like the good old boys network except the other direction.

In my experience women in leadership roles tend to promote and pay women less. My company did an internal study that showed that the highest levels of pay inequity were under women hiring managers. They eventually made an effort to fix the pay gap to stop women from leaving.

[Anonymous]

So, we've moved from "what about the boys?" to "what about the men?"

Men just need to nut up. This is pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am all for supporting women and encouraging them to be leaders. However, I hate what we are doing in society today, forgetting about the boys and younger men sometimes. The old white guys seem to women out in the old generation. But they are different than the young males who are struggling right now.

In my company (in a field that was formerly considered male dominant), 65% of the leadership is women. We were told specifically to promote women into these positions, and once the women are in they continue to push other women into leadership positions. It's like the good old boys network except the other direction.

In my experience women in leadership roles tend to promote and pay women less. My company did an internal study that showed that the highest levels of pay inequity were under women hiring managers. They eventually made an effort to fix the pay gap to stop women from leaving.

In my experience, the best/better/good/okay supervisors I've had have all been men. Similar for DH, friends and family members.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I notice that articles like these always frame the issue as some deficiency or failing with men, whereas when a demographic trend is unfavorable for women it is usually externalized, attributed to some outside force or...blamed on men again.

We need to start being honest about how held-preferences, individual action and societal forces are combining to foment these trends.

It's easy to just resort to bludgeoning men, but I don't think it's the answer long term.

I do think the answer is with men. My dh was raised by his parents to be a full partner: work, cook, clean, love children, remember holidays. So many men just weren't. They basically think all they need to do is get a job. Showing up doesn't count anymore for men. Women do it all and men need to step up. I'm raising my sons to do better.

I have both sons and daughters and I also think schools play a role. They are geared towards girls who sit better and don't need as much activity.

You say the answer is with men and then also talk about how pedagogy has been slanted to emphasize the ways in which girls learn at the expense of boys...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't see how this is a problem?

Same thing is Japan. They're fine.

https://www.nippon.com/en/japan-data/h00759/

Japan is not fine. At all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, we've moved from "what about the boys?" to "what about the men?"

Men just need to nut up. This is pathetic.

This type of talk is really toxic and why so many are starting to listen to people like Andrew Tate and Jordan Peterson.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't see how this is a problem?

Same thing is Japan. They're fine.

https://www.nippon.com/en/japan-data/h00759/

They're not fine at all lol. The demographic time bomb is a huge issue for Japan.

[Anonymous]

Not sure how to resolve these kinds or issues.

I have friends who are teachers. They see lots of little boys struggling in the system. Lack of social skills, immaturity. The girls are more sophisticated.

I worry about the girls who have suicidal thoughts due to self-esteem. Then I also question how much is that also driven by other little girls versus the overall society? Most of my children's social media feeds are by girls showing off all the friends they have and cool things they do. The boys don't do as much of this.

I also worry about boys who lack social skills and don't even know it. They have less sense of team work. We will release these kids into the world, and if they are ill prepared for work or a healthy relationship, then we all suffer as a society. It isn't just enough to tell them to be better or that it's their fault or the fault of their older misogynistic generation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, we've moved from "what about the boys?" to "what about the men?"

Men just need to nut up. This is pathetic.

This is the way! More of this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Considering most college students are women and most college drop outs are men, I don't really expect to see this reverse any time soon. Most of the jobs that men fell back to are becoming automated so that they need fewer humans doing the same amount of work.

At this point, I think it might be prudent to figure out a solution to these problems. Maybe start all boys in Kindergarten at 6 or 7 instead of 5 or 6. Then by the time they reach college they can actually be mature enough to complete it.

I don't think one year is going to make a difference for a man to complete a college degree or not. They can also go to college much later in life when they are ready.

From a socializing perspective, it's the phones and computers. It's so easy now for boys to lose themselves in cyberspace and only interact with people in that space. We saw just how easy that was during the pandemic.

I think it would help if schools had a no phone policy.

Young women have decided that they would rather stay single in their youth than be with a man who doesn't meet their criteria. Women are ok with that because they have a strong social circle and can get their social/emotional needs met there. Young men don't have that. That's why they are floundering. We need to teach them to cultivate friendships. Men who are outgoing, great personality, kind but don't have a degree are still a decent catch, and a lot of women will be attracted to them. But, men who are socially awkward, not mature and don't have a degree? They are sol.

My son tells me that the 'me too' movement has put social interaction on ice. Young men are afraid to ask women out because they are risking being 'me too'd', that's why they do it through apps. They are scared that women will react badly if they approach them in person. My DH asked me out several times and I turned him down several times, he was persistent, young men can't do that now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So, we've moved from "what about the boys?" to "what about the men?"

Men just need to nut up. This is pathetic.

This is the way! More of this!

Enjoy having your rights stripped away by men being told to nut up into toxic masculinity and vote for f'ing fascists.