As a parent, I feel strongly about...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a two-year-old and a newborn. I do feel strongly about having an educated, loving nanny over daycare or even my sole involvement. Our nanny has a masters in Early Childhood Development and has years of teaching experience. She has a skill set that DH and I simply don’t have and knowledge we don’t possess. I’ve always worked from home so I see how nanny engages and teaches my children. And how she loves them.

It’s also important to me to breastfeed at the breast and not to do any sort of cry-it-out sleep training. I believe firmly in the “fourth-trimester” concept of holding a newborn as much as humanly possible in the first three months.

+1. I believe in the vital importance of the first three years of life. We sacrificed greatly to afford our college educated, former teacher nanny long before it was popular or possible. Both of my kids have always been great, excited learners, in large part, thanks to their nanny.

I don’t think “having a nanny” is a parenting value. If your nanny is how you get at your value of education and enthusiasm for learning, great. But I know lots and lots of kids who have this without a nanny, including my own.

I disagree, PP. I believe having an educated nanny is a parenting value. This kind of childcare is not inexpensive and lots of things are sacrificed to pay for it. So the one-on-one engagement with teacher from birth on is a priority for us.

[Anonymous]

I definitely feel strongly about giving my children the best possible start in life. DH and I give up a great deal for that

[Anonymous]

I feel strongly about antiracist school integration -- intentionally choosing a school in which my white, middle class kid is not in the majority, choosing not to hoard opportunity by requesting to transfer to certain schools/get certain teachers/apply for special programs/get tested for gifted and talented, etc. It's been a journey to get to this point, after a few years of navigating the school lottery systems, boundary discussions, and ugly conversations about "good" and "bad" schools, but I finally feel like now our family is living our values.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel strongly about antiracist school integration -- intentionally choosing a school in which my white, middle class kid is not in the majority, choosing not to hoard opportunity by requesting to transfer to certain schools/get certain teachers/apply for special programs/get tested for gifted and talented, etc. It's been a journey to get to this point, after a few years of navigating the school lottery systems, boundary discussions, and ugly conversations about "good" and "bad" schools, but I finally feel like now our family is living our values.

Your poor kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel strongly about antiracist school integration -- intentionally choosing a school in which my white, middle class kid is not in the majority, choosing not to hoard opportunity by requesting to transfer to certain schools/get certain teachers/apply for special programs/get tested for gifted and talented, etc. It's been a journey to get to this point, after a few years of navigating the school lottery systems, boundary discussions, and ugly conversations about "good" and "bad" schools, but I finally feel like now our family is living our values.

I am curious where you landed in terms of schools. I know people who say stuff like this and argue against charters and take great pride in sending their kids to IB schools. But then it turns out their IB is a perfectly fine school. This gets a lot harder when your IB is genuinely a failing school with skyrocketing suspension and truancy rates.

We will either lottery out of our IB or move before our kid hits 1st grade. I value making anti-racist choices but I also value not spiting my child to serve my image of what a progressive should do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:5 and 8 year olds. I hope for them to find happiness. Part of that will come from finding a solid career so I hope to prepare them for that.

Living only for your own happiness is what makes a narcissist. I feel strongly that people should strive for duty and honor before personal happiness. I hope they lead conventional lives, and am teaching traditional values - faith, charity, loving their neighbors. It is the best path for finding, not merely “happiness,” but true joy and contentment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:5 and 8 year olds. I hope for them to find happiness. Part of that will come from finding a solid career so I hope to prepare them for that.

Living only for your own happiness is what makes a narcissist. I feel strongly that people should strive for duty and honor before personal happiness. I hope they lead conventional lives, and am teaching traditional values - faith, charity, loving their neighbors. It is the best path for finding, not merely “happiness,” but true joy and contentment.

Sorry, what is the difference between happiness and true joy/contentment?

That's just navel gazing, isn't it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:5 and 8 year olds. I hope for them to find happiness. Part of that will come from finding a solid career so I hope to prepare them for that.

Living only for your own happiness is what makes a narcissist. I feel strongly that people should strive for duty and honor before personal happiness. I hope they lead conventional lives, and am teaching traditional values - faith, charity, loving their neighbors. It is the best path for finding, not merely “happiness,” but true joy and contentment.

Sorry, what is the difference between happiness and true joy/contentment?

That's just navel gazing, isn't it?

I would say happiness is fleeting: keeping up with the Joneses, consumerism, divorces/remarriages. Joy and contentment come from finding your vocation, and working to help your fellow man.

[Anonymous]

Global warming. I worry about their future.
I have taken on a much more active role than I did before.

[Anonymous]

I feel strongly that we should...

- teach our kids a strong work ethic,
- teach our kids empathy towards others,
- provide our kids with the best education possible,
- model healthy lifestyle choices,
- teach our kids how to do things for themselves,
- provide love and support

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teaching them to be empathetic and confident enough in themselves to be able to say no to friends. Teaching them to not be materialistic.

My kids are 8 and 10 but I do still feel pretty strongly about not putting infants in daycare. No judgment on people who do as we don’t all have the choice. And of course I support the movement for paid parental leave.

I am a SAHM. I am glad my parents put me in day care. My mom didn't enjoy parenting at all. Some people are better off just being night/weekend parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:5 and 8 year olds. I hope for them to find happiness. Part of that will come from finding a solid career so I hope to prepare them for that.

Living only for your own happiness is what makes a narcissist. I feel strongly that people should strive for duty and honor before personal happiness. I hope they lead conventional lives, and am teaching traditional values - faith, charity, loving their neighbors. It is the best path for finding, not merely “happiness,” but true joy and contentment.

Sorry, what is the difference between happiness and true joy/contentment?

That's just navel gazing, isn't it?

I would say happiness is fleeting: keeping up with the Joneses, consumerism, divorces/remarriages. Joy and contentment come from finding your vocation, and working to help your fellow man.

Consumerism/divorces/remarriages obviously don't contribute to happiness. I think we've established that striving for joy or striving for happiness are pretty similar. Thus, navel gazing.

[Anonymous]

Trying to raise optimistic kids who can look on the bright side of things.

Too many people are pessimistic, constantly comparing and hyper competitive and frankly miserable as a result.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel strongly about antiracist school integration -- intentionally choosing a school in which my white, middle class kid is not in the majority, choosing not to hoard opportunity by requesting to transfer to certain schools/get certain teachers/apply for special programs/get tested for gifted and talented, etc. It's been a journey to get to this point, after a few years of navigating the school lottery systems, boundary discussions, and ugly conversations about "good" and "bad" schools, but I finally feel like now our family is living our values.

That seems strange. Being anti racist, who could be against that.

But why would you not apply for special programs for your kids? Or have them tested for gifted programs? That means their education won't be as good as it can be. That makes no sense, why would a parent do that to a child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel strongly about antiracist school integration -- intentionally choosing a school in which my white, middle class kid is not in the majority, choosing not to hoard opportunity by requesting to transfer to certain schools/get certain teachers/apply for special programs/get tested for gifted and talented, etc. It's been a journey to get to this point, after a few years of navigating the school lottery systems, boundary discussions, and ugly conversations about "good" and "bad" schools, but I finally feel like now our family is living our values.

That seems strange. Being anti racist, who could be against that.

But why would you not apply for special programs for your kids? Or have them tested for gifted programs? That means their education won't be as good as it can be. That makes no sense, why would a parent do that to a child?

They want to teach their white DS that they are not in his corner, that he is on his own, that his mother doesn't value him. That will make the world a better place.