How do I get my 10 yr old to move more? worried about her weight

[Anonymous]

As parents covid really screwed us over. I had a really healthy teen, now fat— I can’t say a word and she doesn’t seem to notice. Its horrible. Her friends for the most part look even worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

This is what I was thinking- that’s not even close to overweight?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As parents covid really screwed us over. I had a really healthy teen, now fat— I can’t say a word and she doesn’t seem to notice. Its horrible. Her friends for the most part look even worse.

Hon, Covid has screwed us all over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seriously op? You posted about your 10 year old when you have an older child that needs professional help gaining weight? Is she on a stimulant? If so, who cares if she gets bad grades, or is hyper, she is malnourished! Stop the meds and have your child get healthy.
You should have posted, any tips on how to get my kid to eat? Instead you are telling your girls that the healthy one is doing something wrong? Bcs you are, girls know, your dd knows that you think she is getting fat.

The 12 year old IS getting professional help gaining weight so I didn't need to post about her. I don't need tips from DCUM. Her doctor and a nutritionist are working with her, along with us as a family. I also have not told my 10 yr child she is doing anything wrong. What is wrong with you? I have not spoken about this at all with my 10 year old. And as I said originally, my 10 yr old eats healthy food, she just eats too much of it and is moving less. The nutrionist works with our whole family. This is not a food issue but a portion control issue (maybe) and a moving issue which is why I asked about getting her to move more and said nothing about food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As parents covid really screwed us over. I had a really healthy teen, now fat— I can’t say a word and she doesn’t seem to notice. Its horrible. Her friends for the most part look even worse.

Hon, Covid has screwed us all over.

Indeed. Just one of the many ways.

But, it’s one of the reasons I think a lot of kids are carrying extra weight right now. They couldn’t get out and move 😔

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

Yes. It is within the norm, but on the actual exact percentage of being overweight.OP should worry that she decided to be a lazy parent. She finds time to run on her own, but leaves her 10 year old to sit around all day long.Weight is not even the issue here. Not doing things with you child is.

Let me know when forcing a child to run miles becomes good parenting. I am going to encourage her to run with me but in the past (since March) she always declines.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

Yes. It is within the norm, but on the actual exact percentage of being overweight.OP should worry that she decided to be a lazy parent. She finds time to run on her own, but leaves her 10 year old to sit around all day long.Weight is not even the issue here. Not doing things with you child is.

Let me know when forcing a child to run miles becomes good parenting. I am going to encourage her to run with me but in the past (since March) she always declines.

You said you are planning to ask her, not that you asked her? Which one is it?
You sound like a very high strung person and without any balance in your life. Nobody is saying force your kid to run, but you can't walk with her? What is wrong with your mind set? Life is not all or nothing. Go for a bike ride or a walk with her and skip your run. Bcs you know...that's what parents do, they put their kids first. You were shocked? I mean how does your dd feel when ste steps on a scale and mom freaks out? Bcs you clearly wrote that she used to be a skinny girl. I am pretty sure you caused her an eating disorder with your overreaction. Even if you claim you did not react, your original post clearly stayted "I was shocked!!!"

[Anonymous]

Your 10 yo doesn’t eat too much! She is at an ideal weight for her height. You sound insane.

[Anonymous]

My recently-turned-11-year-old is about 5' and weighs the same thing your daughter does. She's not even remotely pudgy and is playing an outdoor sport this fall and rides her bike for exercise. It would never occur to me to worry that 95 lbs. is "fat" at her height, and her doctor has no issues with it either.

If you're concerned about your daughter's lack of activity, focus on that, but don't blame people for making assumptions about your preoccupation with her weight when you lead with how astounded you were by her weight and lamenting that she used to be skinny. Your initial post is highly focused on her weight, overweight v. skinny, not wanting to give her a complex, and even your desire to get her moving is couched in terms of nipping her "weight problem" in the bud. It's worth a look at your own perspective on body issues and how you may be conveying those without explicitly saying them to both of your children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My recently-turned-11-year-old is about 5' and weighs the same thing your daughter does. She's not even remotely pudgy and is playing an outdoor sport this fall and rides her bike for exercise. It would never occur to me to worry that 95 lbs. is "fat" at her height, and her doctor has no issues with it either.

If you're concerned about your daughter's lack of activity, focus on that, but don't blame people for making assumptions about your preoccupation with her weight when you lead with how astounded you were by her weight and lamenting that she used to be skinny. Your initial post is highly focused on her weight, overweight v. skinny, not wanting to give her a complex, and even your desire to get her moving is couched in terms of nipping her "weight problem" in the bud. It's worth a look at your own perspective on body issues and how you may be conveying those without explicitly saying them to both of your children.

I think you are comparing your kids without meaning to, so the younger one is looking overweight to you, since she is 10 lbs heavier and half a foot shorter.

When my ds lost weight on a stimulant, we did everything to get it back. Stopping for shakes while driving home from school, feeding a full breakfast before school and a full meal after school when it wore off, everything. I am suspicious that your dd is not getting the right kind of care from the team you have now. I can see why you worry about her every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lots of kids around that age chunk up before they start growing. My kid was puffy from about the age of 10. He’s 12 now and has grown about an inch a month during quarantine. Keep her active because she’s bored and needs to change up a routine, but it’s not about weight now.

100% what happened to me. I was only heavier-looking once as a child/teen, and it was for about 6 months at around age 10. Turned out my body was prepping for a major growth spurt, and once that happened I just automatically went back to my old slimmer weight. Kids grow in fits and starts. Getting some kind of physical activity, especially outside the house, is probably a good idea for all of us right now for our general mental and physical health. But please don’t do it because you’re worried about her weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

My DD (11) has the same stats and she’s a little on the chubby side. But nothing a little exercise & mindful eating won’t take care of.

[Anonymous]

I have a similar issue but am not worried about her weight. I’m worried about the reduction of movement since the pandemic began. She has been unhappy about distance learning and the inability to see friends or even just kids her own age. It gets a little old for us to suggest a bike ride or hike. She does soccer now, but it isn’t the same as being in school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

This is what I was thinking- that’s not even close to overweight?!

Kids' BMI and adult are NOT the same. Her DD is about 80th percentile for height/weight. >85th percentile for height/weight is considered overweight for a child.

OP. My DD sounds exactly the same and I could have written your post. I get why you are concerned. I think you are doing the right things. Have her come on runs with you a couple times per week. My DD loves to do this. Sure I don't get in nearly the same intensity of a workout and it is more of a walk than a run, but I'm glad she is moving and I enjoy the time together.

Past that, there isn't much you can besides keeping healthy foods in the house and keeping out junk or items she tends to overeat. You are right not to say anything. For my DD, I think she is developing early and quickly. She wears a 9 shoe now, which is my size. I'm 5'5" and my DD is 5'7" so I don't think she will be taller/larger than average as an adult, but I do think she will be done growing by 12 and probably the tallest in her class for a couple yrs. I grew with this same pattern.

[Anonymous]

5’7 for a girl is taller than average.