How do I get my 10 yr old to move more? worried about her weight

[Anonymous]

10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

[Anonymous]

Sounds as if she attempting to recover from her over scheduled life pre-Covid.

[Anonymous]

I'd start slowly. Turn off the tv/devices more. Make the tempting junk food less available. You can still buy some of it, but maybe not all of it.

Then put daily exercise on her schedule. Tell her she needs to move her body for 30 minutes every day. Make up a list of ideas together of ways to meet that goal. Offer to do it with her. Whatever works well for her.

Never mention weight.

[Anonymous]

Yes never mention weight. Make it all about being healthy.

[Anonymous]

Do not say anything. Start working on your own complex around "skinny" vs "larger" and focus on behaviors instead of body. Make your family life active if you think her activity level has dropped and you think it would be healthy and enjoyable for her to have more activity in her life, not because you want to change her body. She is 10, covid or not her body will/would change over the next few years - often as puberty gets closer this happens and evens out over time, but your focus should not be on changing her body or keeping her body a certain way. Bodies change over time. Keep your focus on creating habits as a family that focus on eating as many meals as you can together, ideally at structured and predictable times. Snacks being structured can also be helpful instead of grazing. It helps you listen to your body better. Your goal is to help her learn how to listen to her body, find joy in movement, so her behaviors lead to overall health. Not focused on her body which is impacted by so many things - puberty, genetics, etc. Focusing on changing bodies or keeping our body a certain way often doesn't lead to healthful behaviors, but more restriction which often backfires. Kids eat in color on instagram has some recent posts on weight and kids, and her highlight on it has some good tips. While her kids are young, her approaches work for all ages of kids and are well supported by research on how to raise healthy kids that enjoy food, know how to listen to their body, etc.

[Anonymous]

I let my 10 yo DS skip asynchronous art and we power walked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sounds as if she attempting to recover from her over scheduled life pre-Covid.

NP. Just stop. How do you know she didn't enjoy all those activities?

OP, just start getting active as a family. Go hiking, biking, running, etc. Does she eat well? If so, then it sounds like it's really just about exercise.

[Anonymous]

pp here and I realized I didn't respond as much about the movement question. I would again structure it into your family life. I wouldn't personally make it a "you have to exercise 30 minutes a day." This isn't really a great way to get someone to enjoy moving their body. But you could structure into your day that every day before dinner you all get out of your house to do something you enjoy, that is active together. Brainstorm with her things she would enjoy - walks, jogs with mom where you all work towards a goal together and maybe plan your own fun 5k, hiking together as a family, shooting the basketball around, yoga, etc. Model for her why you enjoy running - for example maybe you think through things on your mind while you're running, you love the feeling when you finish, focus on it feeling good - not because it prevents your body from changing. Focus on how to help her find enjoyable movement because that is the most likely way that she will continue over time and as an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she's an early grower. My DD is 4' 5" (on the shorter side) and 60 lbs (petite). Honestly, 97 lbs doesn't sound unreasonable for being almost 5 feet tall. Are you sure that's overweight?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like she's an early grower. My DD is 4' 5" (on the shorter side) and 60 lbs (petite). Honestly, 97 lbs doesn't sound unreasonable for being almost 5 feet tall. Are you sure that's overweight?

It’s actually almost underweight.

[Anonymous]

Can she return to some of the sports if outdoors and masked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like she's an early grower. My DD is 4' 5" (on the shorter side) and 60 lbs (petite). Honestly, 97 lbs doesn't sound unreasonable for being almost 5 feet tall. Are you sure that's overweight?

I meant to say that my DD is 10 years old, too.

Also, does she have siblings and/or do you live in a neighborhood where they can play outside? I send my kids outside daily and it's not about weight... it's about fresh air, change of environment, and getting out of the house so that mom can have some peace and quiet. If they choose not to go outside then they must help with chores... they've never once chose to stay in!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:10yr old DD was a very active child pre-covid. She ran 5Ks every 3-4 months, played flag football once a week in fall, lacrosse 3 times a week in fall and spring, basketball 3 times a week in winter, and karate 3 times a week year round. Then covid came. Everything stopped (flag football and basketball were over). Karate went online and is limited. DD seems to have gained significant weight. I notice she moves less and eats more (sometimes out of boredom). She doesn't eat unhealthy food but she eats a lot of food. Yesterday she stepped on a scale and I was shocked!!! She's 4'11" and 97 lbs. She is on the cusp of being overweight and she used to be a skinny girl. I don't want to give her body image issues or a complex so I have said nothing.

I m a runner. I plan to ask her to start running with me at least one time a week. I run about 5 miles but will see if she can do 1 mile. She used to run 5Ks but now I'm not sure she can run a mile without stopping. How else can I encourage more movement to get this under control?

Is this satire? That’s a 19.6 BMI.

People really need to understand that children are on a different BMI scale. My 10 year old daughter has a BMI of 14.7. That is considered normal and not underweight.

[Anonymous]

have you tried a treadmill with a donut on a fishing line?