I can’t do this anymore. I think I am having a mental meltdown

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I gave up on parenting about a week ago.

The kids can do whatever they want. We offer food, clothing, shelter, books, TV or they can go outside.

After a few weeks of shelter-in-place I told my kids they had to start entertaining themselves. I help with school work (even added some of our own for a while, though we declared summer from the home-initiated stuff this week), we feed you, we supervise you outside as needed. But we don't entertain you.

It's honestly been a lot easier since then. The kids have done some interesting things they came up with.

OP, people belong in community. It's fine to feel like this situation is messed-up. It is.

[Anonymous]

The only people who should feel like a failure are the idiots who social distanced in the first place. This whole thing was a farce from day one. We didn’t SD for a second, and we never got the thing. Yes, enough already. What are you waiting for?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only people who should feel like a failure are the idiots who social distanced in the first place. This whole thing was a farce from day one. We didn’t SD for a second, and we never got the thing. Yes, enough already. What are you waiting for?!

Hopefully your child learns about exponential growth in their distance learning b/c you surely won’t teach them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You take the risks you’re able to handle. I’m worried about a second wave of COVID cases so I’m willing to stick it out for the next few months.

Read this: https://www.cebm.net/covid-19/covid-19-epidemic-waves/

It’s by a fellow at Oxford.

Most of what we know about 2nd waves in pandemics is from the Spanish Flu, which is not a comparable situation to this one, for reasons explained in the link.

I’m not saying there won’t be outbreaks that we will need to handle, but the notion of a *more* deadly 2nd wave is taken from a situation that is VERY different than the one we’re experiencing now.

And it’s all conjecture, so we want to prepare for the worst while hoping for the best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You take the risks you’re able to handle. I’m worried about a second wave of COVID cases so I’m willing to stick it out for the next few months.

Read this: https://www.cebm.net/covid-19/covid-19-epidemic-waves/

It’s by a fellow at Oxford.

Most of what we know about 2nd waves in pandemics is from the Spanish Flu, which is not a comparable situation to this one, for reasons explained in the link.

I’m not saying there won’t be outbreaks that we will need to handle, but the notion of a *more* deadly 2nd wave is taken from a situation that is VERY different than the one we’re experiencing now.

And it’s all conjecture, so we want to prepare for the worst while hoping for the best.

I understand. We’re being careful too. I wanted to share that link because it challenges the notion that there WILL be a 2nd wave and it WILL be worse than the 1st one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only people who should feel like a failure are the idiots who social distanced in the first place. This whole thing was a farce from day one. We didn’t SD for a second, and we never got the thing. Yes, enough already. What are you waiting for?!

Oh my

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not all or nothing, you know. You can pick and choose some lower risk activities. It's not like your only choice is between total isolation and being in massive crowds.

This. And I know several parents who have "given up" totally but these same parents weren't exactly knocking it out of the park before. Their kids wouldn't know a screen time limit or a balanced diet if it smacked them in the face. Their parenting strategy seems to be "you can do what you want as long as you leave me alone."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave up on parenting about a week ago.

The kids can do whatever they want. We offer food, clothing, shelter, books, TV or they can go outside.

After a few weeks of shelter-in-place I told my kids they had to start entertaining themselves. I help with school work (even added some of our own for a while, though we declared summer from the home-initiated stuff this week), we feed you, we supervise you outside as needed. But we don't entertain you.

It's honestly been a lot easier since then. The kids have done some interesting things they came up with.

OP, people belong in community. It's fine to feel like this situation is messed-up. It is.

This is how people used to parent. It works out ok.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Heck yes. Single mom, working from home full time. 2 second graders. Just got an email today from one of the teachers that one of my girls hasn’t turned in her social studies and science slides since May 4 and will likely impact her final assessment.

WTF?! Second graders are expected to self teach about the American Revolution.

I have struggled, pushed, reviewed and corrected mat and ELA slides on a daily basis for 2 kids since March. The Science/Social studies slides were posted in the weekly discussion section, not the daily assignments.

I’m so angry, overwhelmed, and feeling like complete f’ing failure because I can’t be a mom, employee, full time caretaker, homemaker, and teacher at the same time.

Divorced Single mom of 13,12,10 with Mentally ill ex- I feel you sister. Eff the revolution anyway.

[Anonymous]

I will do what's best for the overall health and safety of my family. If that means we continue to shelter-in-place, then so be it. My kids go outside and play every day. They sometimes play at a distance with other kids. My older kid connects with friends online. I took my kids to the park on Monday, but we kept our distance from other people. This isn't an all or nothing situation, and it never really was. You just have to be mindful, careful, and minimize people contact at this junction. It won't last forever. Yes, its very, very challenging teleworking, being tech support, teaching kids, and trying to make sure assignments are turned in, particularly when teachers are vague, but it is what is for now. I haven't been 100% successful and I dare anyone at work or school to complain about it. I am doing my best.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will do what's best for the overall health and safety of my family. If that means we continue to shelter-in-place, then so be it. My kids go outside and play every day. They sometimes play at a distance with other kids. My older kid connects with friends online. I took my kids to the park on Monday, but we kept our distance from other people. This isn't an all or nothing situation, and it never really was. You just have to be mindful, careful, and minimize people contact at this junction. It won't last forever. Yes, its very, very challenging teleworking, being tech support, teaching kids, and trying to make sure assignments are turned in, particularly when teachers are vague, but it is what is for now. I haven't been 100% successful and I dare anyone at work or school to complain about it. I am doing my best.

You don’t know what shelter in place is. Shelter in place means you can’t leave where you are currently. It’s used for things like active shooter situations, natural disasters, etc.

We used to be under a stay at home order. We no longer are. You are just choosing to limit public interactions. You aren’t sheltering in place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will do what's best for the overall health and safety of my family. If that means we continue to shelter-in-place, then so be it. My kids go outside and play every day. They sometimes play at a distance with other kids. My older kid connects with friends online. I took my kids to the park on Monday, but we kept our distance from other people. This isn't an all or nothing situation, and it never really was. You just have to be mindful, careful, and minimize people contact at this junction. It won't last forever. Yes, its very, very challenging teleworking, being tech support, teaching kids, and trying to make sure assignments are turned in, particularly when teachers are vague, but it is what is for now. I haven't been 100% successful and I dare anyone at work or school to complain about it. I am doing my best.

You sound mentally ill. Sad you chose to have children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only people who should feel like a failure are the idiots who social distanced in the first place. This whole thing was a farce from day one. We didn’t SD for a second, and we never got the thing. Yes, enough already. What are you waiting for?!

Did you figure this all out when you were hiding in the bunker?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will do what's best for the overall health and safety of my family. If that means we continue to shelter-in-place, then so be it. My kids go outside and play every day. They sometimes play at a distance with other kids. My older kid connects with friends online. I took my kids to the park on Monday, but we kept our distance from other people. This isn't an all or nothing situation, and it never really was. You just have to be mindful, careful, and minimize people contact at this junction. It won't last forever. Yes, its very, very challenging teleworking, being tech support, teaching kids, and trying to make sure assignments are turned in, particularly when teachers are vague, but it is what is for now. I haven't been 100% successful and I dare anyone at work or school to complain about it. I am doing my best.

+ 1

I thinnk people who are having mental breakdowns are the ones who were not very involved parents even before COVID. I think the pandemic has made it clear how dysfunctional many families were. That is the reason child abuse and domestic violence has increased to. Earlier people could escape outside the home. Now we are at home and if it is not a haven then everything falls apart.

It is not an all or nothing situation. People are being creative and kids are also playing outside, studying and connecting with friends online. Is your house is a bit messier? Are the chores not done? Have you not been folding clothes after doing laundry? Yes. For most of us all of this is happening and these are minor inconveninces. There are a lot of benefits of staying at home too - kids being able to sleep in duing the week, No commute, Being with family, leisurely pace of school work, no running from one EC to another...these are all benefits that evens out the drawbacks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Heck yes. Single mom, working from home full time. 2 second graders. Just got an email today from one of the teachers that one of my girls hasn’t turned in her social studies and science slides since May 4 and will likely impact her final assessment.

WTF?! Second graders are expected to self teach about the American Revolution.

I have struggled, pushed, reviewed and corrected mat and ELA slides on a daily basis for 2 kids since March. The Science/Social studies slides were posted in the weekly discussion section, not the daily assignments.

I’m so angry, overwhelmed, and feeling like complete f’ing failure because I can’t be a mom, employee, full time caretaker, homemaker, and teacher at the same time.

Divorced Single mom of 13,12,10 with Mentally ill ex- I feel you sister. Eff the revolution anyway.

Seems like you both already had dysfunction in your lives and that has been exacerbated by the pandemic and other issues. You probably had someone else raising your kids at least part of the time (school, camps, activities) and now that is no longer there. It must be hard now, even harder than what was before.