Anyone else a bike widow?

[Anonymous]

only on DCUM is a man vilified and deemed not worthy for finding a fitness routine he enjoys.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:only on DCUM is a man vilified and deemed not worthy for finding a fitness routine he enjoys.

Its not just a fitness routine. Did you read OP's post? He is obsessive about it.

[Anonymous]

Yeah and if hubby is going to pull this routine, he will be paying for household help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:only on DCUM is a man vilified and deemed not worthy for finding a fitness routine he enjoys.

It isn't about fitness. That requires less than an he per day. This is new life wth a new partner- his bike- he has found

[Anonymous]

I have dated guys like this, whose hobbies would always be placed above our relationship. I can't imagine being married to one. I'm sure there are women whose DHs have cycling, gaming, golfing, gambling issues too.

For the sports thing, sometimes it seems like a midlife crisis to me. It's invariably men who didn't make the varsity team in school who are trying to prove to themselves they are serious athletes. Dude, it's over. Nobody cares about the races that you *pay* to enter or the rec games you play. Try hard, but do it for fun and camaraderie and don't let it take away from the rest of your life. I was a serious athlete and like my sport but I don't need to take myself so seriously anymore... all my old teammates feel the same way. Let the glory go, bro.

I'm sorry, OP. I wonder if you could get him to tone it down so he could make it something your family can do together. At least part of the time.

[Anonymous]

Maybe instead she can join him. And why is he or she obligated to help a grown child move or whatever? Helicopter mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe instead she can join him. And why is he or she obligated to help a grown child move or whatever? Helicopter mom.

You don’t understand the psychology of men like this. Going along with them is not an option. I’ve tried- some of the least fun, downright miserable attempts at a together activity. They don’t want to do this together and if they do allow you to join, you will be left in the dust immediately.

Dropping kids to college is not helicopter. Are you even a parent??

[Anonymous]

Woman here. Biking is incredibly healthy and makes people happy. Just deal with it , at least he’s not shooting up or whoring around.

[Anonymous]

Can you switch tasks - have him help his daughter move, and you stay home and hold down the fort and deal with dogs etc?

Can you hire someone to take the dogs out?

Don't they just need to be let out to go to the bathroom for a few minutes?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have dated guys like this, whose hobbies would always be placed above our relationship. I can't imagine being married to one. I'm sure there are women whose DHs have cycling, gaming, golfing, gambling issues too.

For the sports thing, sometimes it seems like a midlife crisis to me. It's invariably men who didn't make the varsity team in school who are trying to prove to themselves they are serious athletes. Dude, it's over. Nobody cares about the races that you *pay* to enter or the rec games you play. Try hard, but do it for fun and camaraderie and don't let it take away from the rest of your life. I was a serious athlete and like my sport but I don't need to take myself so seriously anymore... all my old teammates feel the same way. Let the glory go, bro.

I'm sorry, OP. I wonder if you could get him to tone it down so he could make it something your family can do together. At least part of the time.

+1

[Anonymous]

Hire a dog walker. He sounds self centered in a larger issue way, but this particular problem is actually easy to solve. Stop focusing on who takes care of the dogs and just hire someone to do it.

But definitely do address this if it is a larger issue, and it sounds like it is.

[Anonymous]

There are definitely worse hobbies (like, for example, having an affair, which seemed to be my spouse's hobby), but I can't believe it didn't dawn on him to help your daughter move her stuff. I agree with the PP who suggested that he go to help your daughter move, and you stay back with the kids at home and the dogs. Also, if he took his bike to your daughter's college, couldn't he still ride some? There needs to be some compromise with all of these events going on (daughter's move, daughter's graduation, kids' final exams).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hire a dog walker. He sounds self centered in a larger issue way, but this particular problem is actually easy to solve. Stop focusing on who takes care of the dogs and just hire someone to do it.

But definitely do address this if it is a larger issue, and it sounds like it is.

I hear your frustration, but this is a valid point. You can probably find out the name of someone in your neighborhood who does this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have dated guys like this, whose hobbies would always be placed above our relationship. I can't imagine being married to one. I'm sure there are women whose DHs have cycling, gaming, golfing, gambling issues too.

For the sports thing, sometimes it seems like a midlife crisis to me. It's invariably men who didn't make the varsity team in school who are trying to prove to themselves they are serious athletes. Dude, it's over. Nobody cares about the races that you *pay* to enter or the rec games you play. Try hard, but do it for fun and camaraderie and don't let it take away from the rest of your life. I was a serious athlete and like my sport but I don't need to take myself so seriously anymore... all my old teammates feel the same way. Let the glory go, bro.

I'm sorry, OP. I wonder if you could get him to tone it down so he could make it something your family can do together. At least part of the time.

wow, what a miserable outlook you have. no wonder you're divorced and alone. Enjoy your cats.

[Anonymous]

Why am I not surprised to learn that those dweebs who take up all of MacArthur Blvd all weekend long are also d-bags in real life?