To the Women Who Look at me with Disdain, go to &^$*(

[Anonymous]

'' excuse me... wich is your car? my nanny was looking for something like this...''


I MEAN!!!! because where I came from I do have money and since I got in the U.S.A just because I'm from South America people think that I don't have a college degree and a NICE LIFE where I came from.. and instead cleaning toilets I came here to Study. I hate people who looks me like that.

[Anonymous]

PP here,

I meant ''wich year is your TOYOTA..''


Sorry.

[Anonymous]

OP, you have to understand that you are judged visually before being judged verbally. Science tells us that humans and animals use their eyesight for personal survival.

Clothing is your non-verbal communication tool. We're not talking about the importance of looking nice. We're talking about dressing in a way that represents who you really are. If you are getting stares and getting upset about it, then it is your issue and you need to find a solution.

It is about dressing appropriately for the occasion and showing respect for the people and places you associate with. You can still dress casually but it sounds as if you are not dressing to honor your own authentic self. Dress authentically and you will be happy and others will not misread you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here,

I meant ''wich year is your TOYOTA..''


Sorry.

Toyota Landcruisers cost about $70,000.

Just fyi.

[Anonymous]

When I am feeling judged or stared at, I usually smile really wide and wave at the people staring. They are shocked into smiling back and I feel good karma coming my way. Sure, I would maybe love it if acid fell on their faces some days, but I just smile through it....fuck 'em. I have a good life, cannot let starers get me down!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:oh yeah, forgot to mention--spit is one of the trade-offs.

Yeah, when I was in public school I spit on private school kids every chance I got. (jk, jk!)

[Anonymous]

I simply cannot resist responding to all this. I realize this will elicit some dreadful retorts. I'm quite certain I'm the wealthiest woman/person (self made) at my son's school and have one of the highest net worths in the metro DC area and no one would ever know by the way I dress. This stuff is so trivial, nonsense, silly. Truly rich people and, frankly, secure people actually play this down big time. I go out of my way to look middle class, if you can believe it. I'm terrified my son will grow up with a philosophy of entitlement. I busted my ass in buiness school and on Wall Street. I want him to live up to his potential and work as hard as his parents have. I desperately want him to have middle class values. His only real luxury/priviledge is a private school education. OP, totally ignore the stares and just realize there's more than likely nothing there. She's playing a role -- wealthy-looking suburban mom -- and give her credit for how well she executes on it. It's a bit theatre. Take joy in who you are and focus on the things that matter. On the other hand, I am sorry for anyone who is truly financially insecure these days, especially moms who live paycheck to paycheck and struggle to do the best for their children. If you only knew how truly rich people (net worth >$100MM) see some of these archtypes you're referring to, you'd have a good laugh. Truly wealthy people generally go out of there way to look, well, like everyone else. Life is short, focus on what matters -- the health of children and family, achievement and growth and self-defined success. I'll get off the soapbox.

[Anonymous]

Interesting post. I guess your basic point is that in many instances, the ones who flaunt it are the ones who don't really have it. I like it!

[Anonymous]

You aren't going to change these people you think are looking down on you. So then you need to change yourself. You have to decide whether to (a) change how you dress in order to fit in with whatever social class you think is dissing you (and it may not be the richest, as others have pointed out), or (b) learn to ignore the starers. Decide which is more important to you, and do it!

You probably don't even expect to change anybody by posting this thread. I venture to guess that starting a thread here is just to vent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only time I went to a public school was for kindergarden. Some girl spit on me. I've never forgotten that. So, anytime I hear the word "public" I think of spitting. So, my kid goes to a private.

Can the bubble you're raising her in fit through the private school doors?

utterly ridiculous

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
To all those parents who judge humans by the clothing we wear, go to hell, really. We are entitled to have an off day. We are entitled to dress down sometimes. So long as our clothing is clean, and our body and hair are clean, it should not matter to you what we wear. It should not matter if our clothing comes from Neimans or Target or Costco.

ok
don't let others cut into your peace....but realize that your child is learning many lessons in this atmosphere, not simply how to multiply and read....
perhaps if this is a pervasive attitude, it's time to ensure your child understands your values
perhaps you should make every effort to continue exactly as you are, cos you give the other kids a different perspective from the 'norm'....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I simply cannot resist responding to all this. I realize this will elicit some dreadful retorts. I'm quite certain I'm the wealthiest woman/person (self made) at my son's school and have one of the highest net worths in the metro DC area and no one would ever know by the way I dress. This stuff is so trivial, nonsense, silly. Truly rich people and, frankly, secure people actually play this down big time. I go out of my way to look middle class, if you can believe it. I'm terrified my son will grow up with a philosophy of entitlement. I busted my ass in buiness school and on Wall Street. I want him to live up to his potential and work as hard as his parents have. I desperately want him to have middle class values. His only real luxury/priviledge is a private school education. OP, totally ignore the stares and just realize there's more than likely nothing there. She's playing a role -- wealthy-looking suburban mom -- and give her credit for how well she executes on it. It's a bit theatre. Take joy in who you are and focus on the things that matter. On the other hand, I am sorry for anyone who is truly financially insecure these days, especially moms who live paycheck to paycheck and struggle to do the best for their children. If you only knew how truly rich people (net worth >$100MM) see some of these archtypes you're referring to, you'd have a good laugh. Truly wealthy people generally go out of there way to look, well, like everyone else. Life is short, focus on what matters -- the health of children and family, achievement and growth and self-defined success. I'll get off the soapbox.

can you stay UNDER your soapbox? I am much like you, and would never post something like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I simply cannot resist responding to all this. I realize this will elicit some dreadful retorts. I'm quite certain I'm the wealthiest woman/person (self made) at my son's school and have one of the highest net worths in the metro DC area and no one would ever know by the way I dress. This stuff is so trivial, nonsense, silly. Truly rich people and, frankly, secure people actually play this down big time. I go out of my way to look middle class, if you can believe it. I'm terrified my son will grow up with a philosophy of entitlement. I busted my ass in buiness school and on Wall Street. I want him to live up to his potential and work as hard as his parents have. I desperately want him to have middle class values. His only real luxury/priviledge is a private school education. OP, totally ignore the stares and just realize there's more than likely nothing there. She's playing a role -- wealthy-looking suburban mom -- and give her credit for how well she executes on it. It's a bit theatre. Take joy in who you are and focus on the things that matter. On the other hand, I am sorry for anyone who is truly financially insecure these days, especially moms who live paycheck to paycheck and struggle to do the best for their children. If you only knew how truly rich people (net worth >$100MM) see some of these archtypes you're referring to, you'd have a good laugh. Truly wealthy people generally go out of there way to look, well, like everyone else. Life is short, focus on what matters -- the health of children and family, achievement and growth and self-defined success. I'll get off the soapbox.

can you stay UNDER your soapbox? I am much like you, and would never post something like this.

Why not? (another one here). I'm from the northeast, where displays of wealth are considered vulgar and the WASPs with the biggest trust funds usually drive around in beat-up cars and wear grungy LL Bean jackets. People with real money are more interested in conserving it for the next generation, or giving it away to charity. Not spending it on themselves. It's occasionally depressing to feel like people are judging me based on what I'm wearing, but I'm not going to change, because I don't need friends like that anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe they looked you up and down because they liked your sweatsuit and thought it looked comfortable?

Ha!

[Anonymous]

Wow, three posters in this thread with net worths in the 100s of millions. Who'da thunk it?