About to blow my top with my D's university.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter really doesn't have any excuse for 1) not knowing her own grades, and 2) not knowing her degree requirements. You're really trying to blame the school but they didn't fail the class, she did.

Completely agree. If I was skirting close to a D in a class, sure as heck I’d know what that final grade was before I started telling future employers that I received my diploma.

You should be upset with your grown daughter. The college did nothing wrong.

+1 I was that idiot senior who was coming awfully close to receiving no credit for a class second semester senior year and you better believe that I knew my exact cumulative grade after every grading event. At my top 20 college the school would let you walk with your class but you would get the empty box....i thought that was a rather generous gesture.

[Anonymous]

Who fails a degree requirement as a senior? Very trashy. Your daughter was partying and goofing off instead of hitting the books. I’m guessing a joke degree too, like communications or sociology.

[Anonymous]

It's understandable why your daughter would hide her D from you, but now it's time for her to fix this problem.

[Anonymous]

"Trashy" "Idiot"

Really, this is a very young adult. Some people mature later than others.

Yes, call it a teachable moment. But please refrain from the judgemental labeling. Talk about a coarsening of social discourse!

[Anonymous]

I hope this thread becomes a teachable moment for many kids going off for their senior year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope this thread becomes a teachable moment for many kids going off for their senior year.

I hope it also becomes a teachable moment for parents used to smoothing the way for their little darlings. This is real life and there are consequences: if you've raised someone who is irresponsible or used to you cleaning up their messes, it'll come back to bite you in the end.

[Anonymous]

I had a guy work for me who failed an advanced math course. He was going for a bachelor's in Computer Science at a top-25 school. Because he failed that, he never got a diploma. I hired him anyway since I cared more about his skills than a piece of paper. He always said he'd finish up that final class, but never did and you had 7 years (starting from when you were a freshman) to finish your degree.

I guess it's 20 years later and he still has no degree, but no employer cares anyway since he has such good experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also don't understand how she had no idea she got a D in the class.

If the course is heavily weighted toward the final and she bombed it, it could happen. And, depending on the class, it's even possible to bomb a final without knowing it. I've never been in OP's DD's situation, but I definitely got a few bad grades on papers that I thought were great because the prof just had a really different set of criteria for grading than other profs I'd had.

OP, you need to let your DD handle this and not take it so personally. It's a pretty awful situation, and depending on where she works she honestly could lose her job. But the more proactive she is in resolving this, the better the outcome will be for her. I went to an HYPS school, and I was the student rep to the committee on requirements. There was one guy who lost his job, because the committee rejected his petition to substitute an independent study for a requirement that he never filled while in school. I really felt, though, that the school and his employer would have been more willing to work with him if he had not waited almost a year to resolve the situation.

[Anonymous]

Wow my reactions is though your D should have been on top of the grade situation this is totally on your D's school.

They are telling you three months later only because you inquired? I would say this is gross negligence on their part and it sounds like they are even admitting that.

I would go to the dean if they do not allow her to take her course locally. At 21 many kids just don't think like us wiser adults do.

I am sure it is a major life lesson for your D and in the end ,a good one however this is something the school should have advised you months ago!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a guy work for me who failed an advanced math course. He was going for a bachelor's in Computer Science at a top-25 school. Because he failed that, he never got a diploma. I hired him anyway since I cared more about his skills than a piece of paper. He always said he'd finish up that final class, but never did and you had 7 years (starting from when you were a freshman) to finish your degree.

I guess it's 20 years later and he still has no degree, but no employer cares anyway since he has such good experience.

White guy, right? Just as good as a diploma ...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also don't understand how she had no idea she got a D in the class.

If the course is heavily weighted toward the final and she bombed it, it could happen. And, depending on the class, it's even possible to bomb a final without knowing it. I've never been in OP's DD's situation, but I definitely got a few bad grades on papers that I thought were great because the prof just had a really different set of criteria for grading than other profs I'd had.

OP, you need to let your DD handle this and not take it so personally. It's a pretty awful situation, and depending on where she works she honestly could lose her job. But the more proactive she is in resolving this, the better the outcome will be for her. I went to an HYPS school, and I was the student rep to the committee on requirements. There was one guy who lost his job, because the committee rejected his petition to substitute an independent study for a requirement that he never filled while in school. I really felt, though, that the school and his employer would have been more willing to work with him if he had not waited almost a year to resolve the situation.

I get not expecting the D, but who just doesn't look at their grades when they're posted? If nothing else, to make sure there were any errors or missing grades that need to be corrected. If I truly didn't expect a D and saw one, I'd at least reach out to the professor to understand what happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow my reactions is though your D should have been on top of the grade situation this is totally on your D's school.

They are telling you three months later only because you inquired? I would say this is gross negligence on their part and it sounds like they are even admitting that.

I would go to the dean if they do not allow her to take her course locally. At 21 many kids just don't think like us wiser adults do.

I am sure it is a major life lesson for your D and in the end ,a good one however this is something the school should have advised you months ago!

It's not a college's job to tell each student whether they've met the requirements for graduation. It's the students' job to know what they need to do to get their degree, and to make sure they do it. Gross negligence to not remind a senior to check her own grades? Ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow my reactions is though your D should have been on top of the grade situation this is totally on your D's school.

They are telling you three months later only because you inquired? I would say this is gross negligence on their part and it sounds like they are even admitting that.

I would go to the dean if they do not allow her to take her course locally. At 21 many kids just don't think like us wiser adults do.

I am sure it is a major life lesson for your D and in the end ,a good one however this is something the school should have advised you months ago!

Her daughter's school had no obligation to inform OP of anything, and, in fact, is barred by FERPA from telling her anything her daughter didn't specifically authorize them to tell her. The likelihood that OP's daughter waived her FERPA protections so that her mother would know she wasn't graduating AND was never once informed that the class didn't count and she hadn't actually earned her degree approach "0."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow my reactions is though your D should have been on top of the grade situation this is totally on your D's school.

They are telling you three months later only because you inquired? I would say this is gross negligence on their part and it sounds like they are even admitting that.

I would go to the dean if they do not allow her to take her course locally. At 21 many kids just don't think like us wiser adults do.

I am sure it is a major life lesson for your D and in the end ,a good one however this is something the school should have advised you months ago!

It's not a college's job to tell each student whether they've met the requirements for graduation. It's the students' job to know what they need to do to get their degree, and to make sure they do it. Gross negligence to not remind a senior to check her own grades? Ridiculous.

Well it kind of is a college’s job to decide if someone passes and graduates. My DH is a professor and he has to submit senior grades a week in advance of grad. People know their status well in advance (not that anyone fails...I don’t think any top 25s fail people!). Troll.

[Anonymous]

OP,

What do you think should have happened, then?

Don’t you agree that your daughter bears some responsibility in checking her grades, regardless of what the college does?