How to spice up sex life in newer marriage...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In today’s climate, it’s risky for even a married man to initiate.

You're stupid.

[Anonymous]

OP here: thanks for the advice. I am not nagging when I say I've talked to him, I've mentioned it a couple times in the last 6 months. We dated 4 years and even first year of marriage no sex drive issues, just severely declined in the last 6 months. He is very affectionate in other ways, hugs, cards, kisses, flowers, but not sure what changed sexually. I know every couple goes through end and flows but can't imagine if this is supposed to be the rest of my life .....

[Anonymous]

Say it more often, and more clearly. Tell him what you want and need. If he doesn't step up, make a therapist appointment.

He may have a health issue. New meds?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like he's not attracted to you. Could be physical or could be you annoy him.

A real man can get ready on the spot for his wife. A hetero man with a properly functioning dick that is. A ready and willing woman of any type is attractive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: thanks for the advice. I am not nagging when I say I've talked to him, I've mentioned it a couple times in the last 6 months. We dated 4 years and even first year of marriage no sex drive issues, just severely declined in the last 6 months. He is very affectionate in other ways, hugs, cards, kisses, flowers, but not sure what changed sexually. I know every couple goes through end and flows but can't imagine if this is supposed to be the rest of my life .....

So many people in your position. This probably is the rest of your life. I bet he never was really high drive to begin with so he ran out of steam quick. For high drive people, it takes them decades of monotomy to slow down.

You sound young. Cut bait now, or just accept that you will spend the rrst of your life andnthen die with a dead sex life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: thanks for the advice. I am not nagging when I say I've talked to him, I've mentioned it a couple times in the last 6 months. We dated 4 years and even first year of marriage no sex drive issues, just severely declined in the last 6 months. He is very affectionate in other ways, hugs, cards, kisses, flowers, but not sure what changed sexually. I know every couple goes through end and flows but can't imagine if this is supposed to be the rest of my life .....

So what changed 6 mos ago? His job? Your job? Money? Discussion on having kids? New "hobby"? Have YOU stopped doing housework?

[Anonymous]

OP, how much weight have you gained since the wedding?

[Anonymous]

Maybe do more chores around the house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: thanks for the advice. I am not nagging when I say I've talked to him, I've mentioned it a couple times in the last 6 months. We dated 4 years and even first year of marriage no sex drive issues, just severely declined in the last 6 months. He is very affectionate in other ways, hugs, cards, kisses, flowers, but not sure what changed sexually. I know every couple goes through end and flows but can't imagine if this is supposed to be the rest of my life .....

Do not take this wrong but how difficult are you to have sex with? Do you make a lot of demands- touch here, do not touch there, this position only, take a long time to get going, make it seems like a huge favor to have sex, etc? Also many women are just bad in bed. Men will put up with that for a while but over the long term the interest just declines.

On another note, sexual fantasies are very narrow. An example you like your arms held down during sex but not rough sex. You really have to talk to your partner and understand what they like about a fantasy. If you don’t it can quickly turn the other person off or it can turn you off. Also you have to keep an open mind and remember it’s just for fun.

[Anonymous]

My DH just has a low libido. When we do have sex he flips me over and all of that.

While I wish we have sex more (only once per week), he makes it worthwhile when we do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:cooks, cleans, does laundry

You married a beta male. He won't change. If you want things spiced up dump him for a more-masculine alpha male.

This is bull. Plenty of men out there who contribute to domestic tasks and would be thrilled to put out every day.

DP. Mine is perfect all around. No labels of today's society fit him.

[Anonymous]

Your husband is masturbating, maybe to porn, maybe not. When seminal fluid in the male builds up it creates the urge to have sex. H needs to save it up for you. At least more of it.

[Anonymous]

This is a very sad post.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is a very sad post.

It is. And so far it's a useless thread bc OP has given few details.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:cooks, cleans, does laundry

You married a beta male. He won't change. If you want things spiced up dump him for a more-masculine alpha male.

This is bull. Plenty of men out there who contribute to domestic tasks and would be thrilled to put out every day.

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