How to comfortably return to company I left over sexual harassment issue?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Man you guys are tough on me. I have been trying not to out myself here because the situation is pretty specific. To give enough context for the advice to be useful to me, though, HR contacted me personally. The hiring partner knows me and wants to hire me. The job is mine if I want it. I am not sure if I should address this old issue with HR. I have no interest in drama. I have no mental health issues. I just want to make sure I know what I am getting into and figure out if I should be asking for any protections. The job is in another area of the firm far from the predator, but he would still be senior to me in the org chart. I have a glowing reference from him in writing and actually think he would vouch for me, crazy as that may sound. And yes, I suppose nothing is confidential, but they’re not going to force me to sue if I consult with them!

HR would force you to sue? Forget "force", why would they want you to sue them? You don't seem to understand how things work. OP, we are being hard on you because you don't get it. We are trying to make you understand. You say you have no interest in drama, but you created it before and are trying to create it again. Yes, you are.

[Anonymous]

OP here. That was sarcasm. I understand perfectly well. My point is that in consulting HR, I would be clear that I am not looking for drama. It would be the opposite actually.

[Anonymous]

Also how exactly did I create drama before? He was seen sexually harassing me and people talked. I didn’t sue, I left. He created the drama but thank you for the victim shaming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. That was sarcasm. I understand perfectly well. My point is that in consulting HR, I would be clear that I am not looking for drama. It would be the opposite actually.

Oy. Knock yourself out OP. We tried.

Next.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also how exactly did I create drama before? He was seen sexually harassing me and people talked. I didn’t sue, I left. He created the drama but thank you for the victim shaming.

You did not handle it properly. Some of the blame for the drama does lie on you.

[Anonymous]

I chose not to sue, I chose to leave. I take responsibility for that, but that was entirely within my rights and created no extra drama. A drawn out lawsuit would have had much more dramatic punch. Obviously if I totally mishandled it on the professional front, I would not be getting recruited back. I am still not sure I wish I had reported to be honest—I might have gotten nowhere AND damaged my career and reputation. And this is why it sucks to be a woman who is harassed in her place of employment. It’s often a no win situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I chose not to sue, I chose to leave. I take responsibility for that, but that was entirely within my rights and created no extra drama. A drawn out lawsuit would have had much more dramatic punch. Obviously if I totally mishandled it on the professional front, I would not be getting recruited back. I am still not sure I wish I had reported to be honest—I might have gotten nowhere AND damaged my career and reputation. And this is why it sucks to be a woman who is harassed in her place of employment. It’s often a no win situation.

Pretty sure the people who you would be working for have no knowledge of this. But they will once people learn you might be coming back.

[Anonymous]

So given that, would you do anything preemptively?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also how exactly did I create drama before? He was seen sexually harassing me and people talked. I didn’t sue, I left. He created the drama but thank you for the victim shaming.

You did not handle it properly. Some of the blame for the drama does lie on you.

?? Stop victim blaming. OP handled it just fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I chose not to sue, I chose to leave. I take responsibility for that, but that was entirely within my rights and created no extra drama. A drawn out lawsuit would have had much more dramatic punch. Obviously if I totally mishandled it on the professional front, I would not be getting recruited back. I am still not sure I wish I had reported to be honest—I might have gotten nowhere AND damaged my career and reputation. And this is why it sucks to be a woman who is harassed in her place of employment. It’s often a no win situation.

There are many actions you could have taken, between “do nothing and quit” and “sue for sexul harassment”.

[Anonymous]

OP, how large of a company are you talking about here? When you say “different location” are you talking about different states? Is the HR team large enough that whomever was told about what happened to you isnt the person who contacted you? Im assuming that whatever was teported to HR isnt in your official employee record as you werent an employee when HR was informed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: I am going to apply to this position because I can always turn it down if I decide I don't want to deal.

OP this is what stood out from your post. What information do you need in order to make this decision?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Man you guys are tough on me. I have been trying not to out myself here because the situation is pretty specific. To give enough context for the advice to be useful to me, though, HR contacted me personally. The hiring partner knows me and wants to hire me. The job is mine if I want it. I am not sure if I should address this old issue with HR. I have no interest in drama. I have no mental health issues. I just want to make sure I know what I am getting into and figure out if I should be asking for any protections. The job is in another area of the firm far from the predator, but he would still be senior to me in the org chart. I have a glowing reference from him in writing and actually think he would vouch for me, crazy as that may sound. And yes, I suppose nothing is confidential, but they’re not going to force me to sue if I consult with them!

If that's the case, then why do you want to open this can of worms? Apply for the job and let the chips fall where they may.

[Anonymous]

I guess I’m just looking for some way of ensuring I am not revictimized or the subject of unprofessional “talk” but maybe there’s nothing to be done here...

[Anonymous]

Why would you go back to this organization? Remember, HR is paid by the employer... Apply to the job, and let the chips fall where they may, however, don't be surprised if you don't hear back from them. Trust me, take all of the respect and dignity you have for yourself and use your energy towards applying to other positions.