Would you marry someone with a history of mental illness?

[Anonymous]

Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is mental illness a deal breaker for marriage?

Mental illness? Maybe. I can tell you I definately wouldn't marry someone small minded who uses ignorance to stigmatize an entire group of people.

OP asked a simple, serious question about a real-world issue; I myself married a bipolar woman. Why you use the words "small minded", "ignorance", and "stigmatize" is bizarre.

[Anonymous]

NO!!!! Never (again).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

One person is not representative of every single person with a mental illness. There are many people without mental illnesses are more of a "hot mess" than some people with properly treated mental illnesses.

[Anonymous]

We're all mentally ill, it's just a matter of degree, and a matter of some people being tested and some not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

One person is not representative of every single person with a mental illness. There are many people without mental illnesses are more of a "hot mess" than some people with properly treated mental illnesses.

New poster here. You are correct. However I was once married to someone who was mentally ill, and now I worry about my kids every day. So far, so good, and I think we would already know if they inherited it. But it's terrifying.

I would never ever marry someone with a mental illness of any sort again. Use me as a cautionary tale. My life was a living hell. And there was no way to know he would develop his illness when I married him.

[Anonymous]

I would pass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

One person is not representative of every single person with a mental illness. There are many people without mental illnesses are more of a "hot mess" than some people with properly treated mental illnesses.

I agree but with mental illness you never know. It's risky and most people run away from marrying someone with mental illness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

One person is not representative of every single person with a mental illness. There are many people without mental illnesses are more of a "hot mess" than some people with properly treated mental illnesses.

New poster here. You are correct. However I was once married to someone who was mentally ill, and now I worry about my kids every day. So far, so good, and I think we would already know if they inherited it. But it's terrifying.

I would never ever marry someone with a mental illness of any sort again. Use me as a cautionary tale. My life was a living hell. And there was no way to know he would develop his illness when I married him.

One of your kids has a mental illness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hell no. I have a friend with mental illness and she's a hot mess. Men are more likely to run away from women with mental illness. It's really sad that my friend can't figure out treatment and it's been 10 + years. She says anxiety keeps her from having a job.

One person is not representative of every single person with a mental illness. There are many people without mental illnesses are more of a "hot mess" than some people with properly treated mental illnesses.

New poster here. You are correct. However I was once married to someone who was mentally ill, and now I worry about my kids every day. So far, so good, and I think we would already know if they inherited it. But it's terrifying.

I would never ever marry someone with a mental illness of any sort again. Use me as a cautionary tale. My life was a living hell. And there was no way to know he would develop his illness when I married him.

One of your kids has a mental illness.

Can you read? She said so far her child is ok. I would never do this myself it's too risky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope, and I say this as someone who had anxiety and depression all throughout my teens and 20s. My DH also has anxiety and for a long time we just fed off each other's anxiety, until I was able to get mine under control. His still isn't and it impacts our marriage.

In general, though, healthy people aren't attracted to those with mental illness, but people with it are attracted to each other (like my DH and I, and pretty much all my relationships before DH. Depression, bipolar, alcoholism, I've dated it all, ha). So if you're considering marrying someone with mental illness, get some counseling for yourself to figure out what's really going on.

There are SO many healthy people out there, it's just not worth it. Back when I was a mess, I wouldn't have wanted to marry myself, either.

You say there are so many healthy people out there, but most everyone I know has or has had something type of physical or mental unhealth. When you find that perfect person come back and let us know.

I'm 12:30/married for 20 years/bulimia/anxiety...interestingly enough, I always thought DH was my respite...his parents had a loving, stable marriage and his younger sibling was a calm, recent college graduate. MIL struggles with situational anxiety, sibling in grips of alcoholism after divorcing from bi polar spouse. You just never know.

Also, different altogether if the person actively refuses to get treatment.

[Anonymous]

Hell no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Would you marry someone who might get cancer some day? Would you marry someone who might start overeating and gain 60 pounds some day? Would you marry someone who shows no sign of mental illness until a brain injury at age 50?

This is such an offensive topic to get in to. Might surprise you OP, but there are many, many people with mental illnesses who frequent DCUM. I'd probably marry most of them before I wanted to marry someone as ignorant as you.

I live lived a hellish childhood with a schizophenic mother. Back then families hid mental illness and so I am sure my father didn't know what he was getting into.

NO, NO, NO, never should you marry or have kids with someone with a mental health history unless you are a fool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Would you marry someone who might get cancer some day? Would you marry someone who might start overeating and gain 60 pounds some day? Would you marry someone who shows no sign of mental illness until a brain injury at age 50?

This is such an offensive topic to get in to. Might surprise you OP, but there are many, many people with mental illnesses who frequent DCUM. I'd probably marry most of them before I wanted to marry someone as ignorant as you.

I live lived a hellish childhood with a schizophenic mother. Back then families hid mental illness and so I am sure my father didn't know what he was getting into.

NO, NO, NO, never should you marry or have kids with someone with a mental health history unless you are a fool.

So no one should marry you ( agreed) or your kids right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is mental illness a deal breaker for marriage?

Mental illness? Maybe. I can tell you I definately wouldn't marry someone small minded who uses ignorance to stigmatize an entire group of people.

LOL at the person who calls other people ignorant and can't even spell simple words.