Being more submissive to my husband

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a submissive wife and it works for us.

I get satisfaction from him being in charge and being the breadwinner/provider. In return as a SAHM I look after the family and take care of his needs both physical and others. Also I am not a decision maker so him telling me what to do is much better than me agonizing over decisions.

Omg, grow a spine already and grow up. You're a grown woman that's glad to be treated like a child and he's your daddy. That is a disgusting dynamic.

What will you do if something happens to your husband? You need to learn how to take care of yourself and make good decisions and earn a living.

Not submissive PP...but that is serious judgement. Clearly not something that works for you but let other be happy with what works for them.

Nope, I'm pretty content passing judgment on this one! Tat had to be said.

We do not fully understand PP's circumstances. We should give her the respect of making her own choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Husbands- what is it about having a submissive wife that's appealing? What do you find challenging about it?

Hi OP. DH here. I have been married twice. The ex was American and not submissive at all. It did not last. DW is from overseas. She grew up in Asia with a more traditional view of gender roles. She is highly accomplished and educated yet as a family we subscribe to more of the power dynamic that you describe. It has worked really well for both of us over the last 10 years. the one thing that does frustrate me sometimes she has a hard time articulating what she wants.

I just wanted to share this to make the point that not every relationship is 50/50.

We're not really talking about 50/50 of chores, though, but an equal share of household choices and decision-making. Although I can see how discouraging discussion and debate might cause a submissive wife to feel inarticulate or unheard.

[Anonymous]

I think that in the long run, my daughters would suffer if I agreed to this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Husbands- what is it about having a submissive wife that's appealing? What do you find challenging about it?

Hi OP. DH here. I have been married twice. The ex was American and not submissive at all. It did not last. DW is from overseas. She grew up in Asia with a more traditional view of gender roles. She is highly accomplished and educated yet as a family we subscribe to more of the power dynamic that you describe. It has worked really well for both of us over the last 10 years. the one thing that does frustrate me sometimes she has a hard time articulating what she wants.

I just wanted to share this to make the point that not every relationship is 50/50.

As an Asian woman, may I just say ewww. Asian woman are not submissive. But they are willing to make compromises for the sake of the family.

PS... she has a hard time articulating what she wants because she is passive aggressive. That's how Asian women like to make you think you make all the decisions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Husbands- what is it about having a submissive wife that's appealing? What do you find challenging about it?

Hi OP. DH here. I have been married twice. The ex was American and not submissive at all. It did not last. DW is from overseas. She grew up in Asia with a more traditional view of gender roles. She is highly accomplished and educated yet as a family we subscribe to more of the power dynamic that you describe. It has worked really well for both of us over the last 10 years. the one thing that does frustrate me sometimes she has a hard time articulating what she wants.

I just wanted to share this to make the point that not every relationship is 50/50.

Eww. This is disgusting. You are practically describing why men have an Asian fetish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a submissive wife and it works for us.

I get satisfaction from him being in charge and being the breadwinner/provider. In return as a SAHM I look after the family and take care of his needs both physical and others. Also I am not a decision maker so him telling me what to do is much better than me agonizing over decisions.

Guy here...I wish you were my wife. There would be a lot less conflict in my household.

+2

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that in the long run, my daughters would suffer if I agreed to this.

Suffer through awesome marriages

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a submissive wife and it works for us.

I get satisfaction from him being in charge and being the breadwinner/provider. In return as a SAHM I look after the family and take care of his needs both physical and others. Also I am not a decision maker so him telling me what to do is much better than me agonizing over decisions.

Guy here...I wish you were my wife. There would be a lot less conflict in my household.

+2

There is clearly a lot of trolling going on in the thread.

My 2 cents: There is an evolutionary basis for this power dynamic. It is more hard wired in some of us than others. Cultural progress has meant societal expectations are much more even but we are still fighting thousands of years of evolution here. As long as its a choice I don't see anything wrong with PP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that in the long run, my daughters would suffer if I agreed to this.

Honestly it would be worse for the boys. Thinking it's normal for mom to express opinions that go disregarded all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Husbands- what is it about having a submissive wife that's appealing? What do you find challenging about it?

Hi OP. DH here. I have been married twice. The ex was American and not submissive at all. It did not last. DW is from overseas. She grew up in Asia with a more traditional view of gender roles. She is highly accomplished and educated yet as a family we subscribe to more of the power dynamic that you describe. It has worked really well for both of us over the last 10 years. the one thing that does frustrate me sometimes she has a hard time articulating what she wants.

I just wanted to share this to make the point that not every relationship is 50/50.

You are exactly like my ex. Ever since we got divorced he has dated a rotating cast of women from overseas because he can tell them what to do and he controls their visa.

He treats them like crap ...makes them do all the domestic chores and probably treats them fairly roughly in bed.

I feel like this submissive thing is just an excuse for men who either never grew up or are not willing to adjust to a normal relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a submissive wife and it works for us.

I get satisfaction from him being in charge and being the breadwinner/provider. In return as a SAHM I look after the family and take care of his needs both physical and others. Also I am not a decision maker so him telling me what to do is much better than me agonizing over decisions.

Guy here...I wish you were my wife. There would be a lot less conflict in my household.

+2

There is clearly a lot of trolling going on in the thread.

My 2 cents: There is an evolutionary basis for this power dynamic. It is more hard wired in some of us than others. Cultural progress has meant societal expectations are much more even but we are still fighting thousands of years of evolution here. As long as its a choice I don't see anything wrong with PP.

That's the basis for men justifying polygamy and fathering so many children out of wedlock. Biologically, a man is supposed to spread his seeds. Culture hasn't kept up with biology. I guess you can use that excuse if it works for you.

[Anonymous]

I can see this type of relationship working only if A. The DH and DW were exactly the same in every facet of life so all decisions would be the same anyway or B. the DH always made decisions that were in the best interest of the family/marriage rather than in his own best interest. But, the men I know who do put their marriage first in all decisions aren't interested in a submissive wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would totally be into this if my husband wasn't such a moron.

The judgment of a person who married a moron (and stayed married to him) could also be questioned...

[Anonymous]

This thread is horrifying

[Anonymous]

Didn't someone do an AMA on this a while back?