That's a moot point. It doesn't matter if op had been trying for ten years or one month. You can't plan a pregnancy around a wedding. Plenty of people get pregnant by accident and there are also tons of weddings to attend in your 20s/30s. If you avoided getting pregnant so you wouldn't miss a wedding then you'd probably never be able to have children. |
Her post at 19:32 (she included her response in the quoted text so it kind of got buried). |
A wedding is a big deal. To people outside of DCUM who see it as a once in a lifetime commitment and a joining of two families. |
I did plan my pregnancy around BILs wedding. I would only do that for close family. |
The same could be said for having a baby. It's not a big deal , you've seen one you've seen them all and other than the parents no one cares that much. |
Ooooo nice dig implying I don't believe in the importance of marriage. I think MARRIAGE is a massively important deal. A wedding is not, a wedding is a day, a party, an event. Expecting everyone to make their lives revolve around your "special day" for months and months just so you don't lose any of the spotlight is beyond ridiculous. |
I'm sorry you don't come from a supportive family that you'd want around you to celebrate your milestones and the commitment you are making. Weddings and marriages have been celebrated with family and community for hundreds of years. There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to have that special moment honored with friends and family. Don't take your anger out on others because they have loving families and you don't. |
You are right, genius. It's a big deal for the parents, which is why they didn't make it to the wedding. |
| There must be more to this? Is this the first grandchild? Is DH's family (and SIL) a different religion or ethnicity than OP? Could this be a reason they let SIL get away with this behavior and aren't so warm to the baby? (I've unfortunately seen situations like that before. ) |
Uh yeah, no. The idea that you would try to squeeze in a wedding after the birth of your child is ridiculous, no matter the timing. Unless maybe the person getting married was also your child! What does that even sound like? "We are so happy for our healthy baby! You good wife? Because I have an open bar calling my name. Peace." This is from someone who timed their pregnancy around her sister;s wedding because I wasn't missing it for anything (and went when I was 36 weeks). |
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Let's simplify this:
Childbirth > wedding Demanding that a couple somehow control their TTC to fit around a wedding = insanity Life happens Deal with it |
NP here - the SIL/BIL did have family and friends present to share their special moment! But, another nice dig! You're going to make DCUM-worthy MIL someday! Or, maybe you're already a MIL I've read about (and not in a good way). |
Well if the baby was born just after midnight, YES I would have attended my siblings wedding that evening at 5pm. Family is that important to me. |
Why don't you read before you post? Baby was born after 4pm and wedding was at 5pm, three hours away. I don't care if OP's ILs are any different culture, religion, they all appear to have attitude of people from ASSgard! It is clear that they hate OP, she married their son, but she and her kid likely never be family to them. |
Family is important to me, which is why it was important for my husband to be around for the first days after our child was born. Since, you know, our child and I are his family. |